[Traditional Enneagram] Enneagram Compatibility

[Sunshine]

Are there any theories about this?

 

[Sunshine]

There's one enneagram type that I find myself consistently drawn to.

 

[Jeffster]

Hopefully it's Seven.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I'm generally don't advocate match-making advice with any type system.
I can say that the relevance of the Enneagram relationships is probably greater than the MBTI, because the Enneagram has so much more to do with personal goals, and philosophies, and behavior. It's not as internal and purely cognitive as the MBTI, so it manifests itself in much more outward ways, the kind of ways that are likely to have an effect on a relationship.

However, there is no way to assert what type would work with what type. Do you want someone just like you? Or how about someone really different and complimentary? Some gradient inbetween perhaps? The answer to this would heavily affect which type you are attracted to.

Aside from attraction, the practical compatibility of two Enneagram types also depends on how to parters involved intend to divide their responsiblities.
It's generally all too complicated and individually determined.

I do recall some statistics about which types form relationships the most often, but I'm not aware of the credibility of these statistics, nor do they say anything about the success rate of relationships after they are formed.

 

[MerkW]

Not sure if there are. I am willing to bet that there probably does exist some theory somewhere. I am not very much involved in the enneagram, so I would not know for certain or not. I, a 5 (wings currently undecided), find myself generally irritated by 2s, 7s, 3s, 6w7s, and 8w7s. I generally get along relatively well with 5s, 4w5s, 6w5s, 1w9s, 9w8s. The rest (4w3s, 1w2s, 8w9s, 9w1s) I usually have no remarkable opinion of.

 

[Sunshine]

I'm generally don't advocate match-making advice with any type system.
I can say that the relevance of the Enneagram relationships is probably greater than the MBTI, because the Enneagram has so much more to do with personal goals, and philosophies, and behavior. It's not as internal and purely cognitive as the MBTI, so it manifests itself in much more outward ways, the kind of ways that are likely to have an effect on a relationship.

However, there is no way to assert what type would work with what type. Do you want someone just like you? Or how about someone really different and complimentary? Some gradient inbetween perhaps? The answer to this would heavily affect which type you are attracted to.

Aside from attraction, the practical compatibility of two Enneagram types also depends on how to parters involved intend to divide their responsiblities.
It's generally all too complicated and individually determined.

I do recall some statistics about which types form relationships the most often, but I'm not aware of the credibility of these statistics, nor do they say anything about the success rate of relationships after they are formed.

Yes. There's probably a lot of non-type related stuff that needs to be taken into account. Some of which might hold more weight than type when it comes to determining compatiblity. Good point.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

It struck me as surprising that Sevens and Ones are supposedly common partners. These two types would make one of the most authentic odd couples in the Enneagram. But I suppose it makes sense for all those people that seek that Anima/Animus relationship.

 

[FFF]

a link you would like

CHECK THIS OUT

 

[SillySapienne]

I'm a four who is a sucker for eights.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I'm a four who is a sucker for eights.

Wow, that's turbulent.

 

[SillySapienne]

Wow, that's turbulent.

<------That's just how I do.

 

[FFF]

I think I'm a 9 for a 9 kinda guy. I think 1's and 2's are good too.

I don't think I would like a 6; they're my biochemical opposite. Also, I'd hate being with a 3 or an 8.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I think I'm a 9 for a 9 kinda guy. I think 1's and 2's are good too.

I don't think I would like a 6; they're my biochemical opposite. Also, I'd hate being with a 3 or an 8.

Interestingly, Nines and Eights pair often, even with the man being the Nine. Funny though, since the one loves to fight so much and the other hates it.

But it's always nice to hear someone(even a man) throw on some positive words for Ones. I rarely see people mention us when talking about attraction.

 

[miss fortune]

I think that ones are quite awesome... there's some delight in just hoping to get them down and dirty and ruffle thier feathers a bit

plus- there's something fascinating about self discipline

Also 8s, 3s and 9s are rather interesting, though I tend to find 2s and 4s a bit emotional for my tastes *shudder*

I fear that I tend to terrify 6s as well

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I think that ones are quite awesome... there's some delight in just hoping to get them down and dirty and ruffle thier feathers a bit

plus- there's something fascinating about self discipline

One of my best(and honestly only) friends is a female Seven. We've had a good joking conversation or two about being in a relationship, but it never extended outside of jokes. We are both aware of the myriad of issues.

You mention getting us down and dirty, and it reminds of a different conversation I had with her. I talked to her about how it's a mistake to start a relationship on the basis that you will some how "convert" the other person, as if romance were some kind of mission.
In light of the fact that Ones and Sevens pair often, I suspect that they both move toward each other with the idea that they will change one another. Seven's think they can sort of "liberate" the One, and One's think they can take Sevens and "set them straight"

I don't think it works nearly as often as people hope. It's not like in the movies.

But hey, there was a compliment in all of that, and I'll take it.

 

[Jeffster]

I'm a 7 and can understand the appeal of a 1. Like right now she could help me clean this filthy apartment up.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I'm a 7 and can understand the appeal of a 1. Like right now she could help me clean this filthy apartment up.

Maybe you'd should have a Two for that.

 

[Jeffster]

Maybe you'd should have a Two for that.

That works too.

 

[FFF]

Interestingly, Nines and Eights pair often, even with the man being the Nine. Funny though, since the one loves to fight so much and the other hates it.

But it's always nice to hear someone(even a man) throw on some positive words for Ones. I rarely see people mention us when talking about attraction.

I know this girl that's a 1 that I'm kinda attracted to and have a pretty easy time getting along with. It'd also be easy for me to tell her that she's okay as she is, and she doesn't have to be perfect. I also think it's really cute the way she tries so hard. She used to try so hard to beat me at Scrabble, but she just wasn't good enough at finding words to be of any competition.

I think things would turn out a lot like the following excerpt from the site I posted on the previous page:

Ones bring clarity and rationality and the ability to articulate ideals and understandings. They strive to improve themselves and their environment, are conscientious, have high ethical and moral standards, and are fair and consistent. Nines bring a gentle, accepting quality that nurtures and supports others without as much explicit demand for self-improvement. Nines are steady, easy to get along with, feel uncritical and undemanding, and prefer harmony and smooth relations over the pleasure of being right or of having the last word in a situation.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I know this girl that's a 1 that I'm kinda attracted to and have a pretty easy time getting along with. It'd also be easy for me to tell her that she's okay as she is, and she doesn't have to be perfect. I also think it's really cute the way she tries so hard. She used to try so hard to beat me at Scrabble, but she just wasn't good enough at finding words to be of any competition.

I think things would turn out a lot like the following excerpt from the site I posted on the previous page:

Ones bring clarity and rationality and the ability to articulate ideals and understandings. They strive to improve themselves and their environment, are conscientious, have high ethical and moral standards, and are fair and consistent. Nines bring a gentle, accepting quality that nurtures and supports others without as much explicit demand for self-improvement. Nines are steady, easy to get along with, feel uncritical and undemanding, and prefer harmony and smooth relations over the pleasure of being right or of having the last word in a situation.

Haha. I'm very familiar with the Enneagram Institute. I'm registered actually(though not the payed registry).

And it's true about trying to win at scrabble.
I get so sad when I keep losing.