Unless both ISTJ and ENFP have borderline S/N, it usually ends shitty.
I've talked about this on numerous occasions before because ISTJ male/ENFP female couplings occur fairly often (I'm guessing due to the fact that in our society ISTJ is often perceived as an ideal personality for a man, and ENFP is perceiveds as an ideal personality for a woman, so their coupling is encouraged by the external forces). But unfortunately for them, NP/SJ rarely make for a great dynamic.
I'm sure it works out for some, but from what I observed, it doesn't for most.
Edgar, I am gonna have to go opposite from you on this one.
I'd say behind an INTJ, an ISTJ is likely one of the better places for an ENFP to end up-especially as we grow older and get more Te. I have noticed the ENTPs tend to find enfps when young and then IXFJs for second wives. I wonder if ENFPs dont trend the same way but towards IXTJs.
I used to think IXTJs were boring as I was hunting for an Ne rush. However the more I watch them, I realize I can talk to them without speaking. We can read each other's facial expressions and communicate. I trust them. I enjoy the Ni grounding of the INTJ and love the abstract intellectual discourse. But the INTJs are much rarer (although I totally got hit on my an INTJ in la jolla last week), so ISTJs are more likely.
The ISTJs have an inferior Ne lurking in the basement. This is where it can be very fun. I will be very NeTe with my NTPs-not much emo at all. Around my ISTJs? I turn into an NeFi lunatic. They love it. It brings their Ne to the surface and makes them play. I dance in the chain mail at work, tell them I will whisper the secrets of ISO 13485 in their ears at midnight, and hop like a bunny down the hallway. They just stare-and giggle. We bond together.
Also I can be the whiniest Fi moany bitch ever and they empathasize. They totally understand and dont think I am selfish at all. What happens in turn is that the ISTJs seek me as a place they can Fi-share with. I may only know them for a week or so and they will share many painful stories as they know they can trust me and they recognize the Fi connection. They know they will not be Fe-shunned for sharing their pain.
I also share their core a little better? I would say they are systems then idealism where mine is idealism then systems. But we are both equally offended by some of the same TiFe behaviors.
ISTJ advice? Set up realistic expectations for how often you can overly emo breakdowns. I have convinced my QA director that if he wants to date emo chicks he has to tolerate once a month emo breakdowns. You cant get the emo without some emo fluctuation.
Also physical contact-we crave it. Set up schedules for petting of your pet ENFP and telling it that you love it. Just consider them part of your daily to-do list and you'll be good.