Do You Experience Limerence?

[Amberiat]

The closest was a low level crush on a guy in cyberspace. Didn't even know what he looked like, only finding his giant brain very attractive. But I wasn't obsessive about it (no intrusive thoughts), only enjoying the random interactions when they happened and greatly enjoyed his posts, even when I disagreed with them. Sex never occurred to me with him, only the desire to get to know him better and if that ended in friendship, that was just as fine too.

Sounds like a tumor, poor guy.

 

[Lady Lazarus]

Yes. But virtually almost never and only with women. With men the in between step has always been virtually non-existent. Perhaps because that is just as constricting and selective in the earliest of preliminary stages alone.

On second thought, I think what I feel would better be described as possessiveness mixed with some of this Limerence stuff.

 

[rav3n]

Sounds like a tumor, poor guy.

lol! What made him unique was that he obviously had high fluid and high crystallized intelligence. Most are much stronger on one than the other. So the product of that was the ability to pull together the unexpected and make it and language his bitch. So the fun was to parse his posts and connect the dots which resulted in unique insights into the topic. Really cool.

 

[Galena]

Yes, though it's become very rare. I like it for what it is - a chance to experience affectionate feelings, which, outside of spontaneous leakages like this, I don't give myself many other chances to feel. IME, though, its a good as a sign that it's not meant to be in reality.

 

[tinker683]

I have before, though not really since I started dating my wife.

It’s definately powerful and compelling...but it’s also empty and hollow and leaves you feeling drained and hurting. I’m glad those days are over

 

[Mind Maverick]

Yes, often when there is strong chemistry or I hit it off well with someone. It's intrusive and I attempt to kill it with fire, I dislike the fact that this shit alters my judgment. It feels about as safe as driving under the influence after being drugged against your will: the intoxication is the emotions, the driving is the path I'm on and choices I navigate. I'd rather have a clear head.

Edit:
The feelings are positive, I just see them in a negative light. They aren't pleasurable to me because the sense of instability and lack of safety is more prominent and a greater priority to me. So basically, I strive to be inert about...generally everything, including these sorts of experiences.

 

[Nomendei]

Yes, and I don’t like it. It makes me feel weak. I might be slightly afraid of it. It has the ability to crash your plans and destroy your dreams.

 

[Coriolis]

Fortunately no.

 

[Earl Grey]

Sadly no. And I barely feel desires for 'something special' or 'exclusivity'.

Mostly interest which can be rationalized away / which can go away very easily.
And, being so focused on one person is just generally tiring.

 

[Mind Maverick]

All the NTs here are like "Kill it with fire/ no thanks" in contrast with some others who actually enjoy it, lol

 

[Luminous]

All the NTs here are like "Kill it with fire/ no thanks" in contrast with some others who actually enjoy it, lol

Nah...

Once, at least in my adult life. I'm not sure how to correctly diagnose my childhood crushes. Anyway, it was rather traumatic and disorienting because I had never experienced anything quite like it before.

Yeah, but thankfully it's decreasing more and more as I get older. It was at its peak during my late teens and early twenties but has dwindled since then. These days I think the most fulfilling relationships are built on mutual understanding, shared values and emotional connection, and that infatuation can be horribly misleading.

I’ve been guilty of the idealizing part or at the very least refusing to acknowledge someone’s shortcomings even as I was aware of them but I don’t relate to the rest except being a nervous wreck around a woman I really like but that in and of itself isn’t unusual I think. Limerence doesn’t sound like a fun state to be in.

Yes, though it's become very rare. I like it for what it is - a chance to experience affectionate feelings, which, outside of spontaneous leakages like this, I don't give myself many other chances to feel. IME, though, its a good as a sign that it's not meant to be in reality.

I have before, though not really since I started dating my wife.

It’s definately powerful and compelling...but it’s also empty and hollow and leaves you feeling drained and hurting. I’m glad those days are over

Yeah, it can be enjoyable. But it can also be traumatic, disorienting, horribly misleading, unrealistic, hollow, draining, hurtful. I'd add distracting, consuming, confusing, depressing.

 

[Forever]

I don’t know whether to feel impressed or dissatisfied with those who seem to put limerance away

 

[Luminous]

I don’t know whether to feel impressed or dissatisfied with those who seem to put limerance away

Eh. And what of those who would use it against you?

 

[Forever]

Eh. And what of those who would use it against you?

Like having limerence with people who wish you harm?

No one I experienced limerence with did not want to deliberately hurt me.

My emotions would not betray me in that way.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

I have before. I actually miss certain aspects of it.

 

[Luminous]

I have before. I actually miss certain aspects of it.

I do also. It's a crutch I'm struggling to walk without.

 

[Mind Maverick]

Nah...

It was really more intended as humor.

 

[spirilis]

I'll say I've never effortlessly lost weight any time in my life other than in the first 2-4wks of limerence's grip. That norepinephrine surge needs to be turned into a pill (ok it probably has and for all I know it's too dangerous to sell).

 

[Maou]

I don't experience it, but I wish I did.

 

[Lib]

I don’t know whether to feel impressed or dissatisfied with those who seem to put limerance away

Or a little bit more Se version: