I wouldn't really get pissed off by someone unintentionally missing something we planned to do. If I hadn't heard from them, initially I'd wonder what held them up, if they didn't typically flake on me, and hope that things were all right on their end.
If a pattern of breaking plans began to emerge, regardless of how often they clearly stated they'd be there, I'd probably just say, "cool, see ya then; let me know if anything changes between now and then." & I wouldn't really invest much in it. If they showed up, cool. If not, well, I'm not surprised; I realize my friend has the tendency to break plans. People seem to get pissed off because they had expectations that may not be applicable to the actual person they're dealing with.
Also, I don't really map out elaborate events, either, so, although I may plan on/look fwd to spending time with a friend, the activities are usually something we can do some other time, and I remain fairly easygoing about it. No real loss there.
I could get annoyed waiting around for them to come over, I guess, but I figure reconfirming your plans and such can come in handy here. Usually I'll ask friends to let me know when they're on their way, if possible. If I haven't heard from them, then it seems appropriate to contact them, to see what's going on. Why waste time getting annoyed if I can easily communicate to resolve it, and, if need be, move on to doing something else with my day?
Can't change people; you can only work out new ways to interact with them to resolve things.
If it's continually problematic, no matter how I try to communicate, etc, and I realize I'm always putting forth a more significant amount of effort into spending time with this friend, than they are with me [assuming there's nothing messed up going on in their lives at the time to acct for the behavior to some extent], then I just stop making plans with them. I don't ignore them, I don't bother getting mad or upset and exploding at them. I just stop actively seeking out their company. In the end, neither of us has truly lost anything, right? No harm done.
Seems like explaining why you failed to make it is sufficient enough in your situation, imo. Falling asleep ..happens.