DAMN IT! I WANT TO HEAR FI USERS EXPRESS THEIR FEELINGS!

[The Great One]

You can't catch me I'm the gingerbread man.

Delicious.

 

[Thessaly]

My Fi is ridiculously annoying and I find the more I suppress it the easier life is for me when it comes to interpersonal grievances. When it comes to my relationship with myself, the more I honor my Fi the more kick ass I become because I feel aligned and authentic. There is nothing worse for an INFP than being at odds with oneself. Usually this means going against the grain so being an INFP is an ongoing battle either internally or with others. It's tough I tell ya!

 

[The Iron Giant]

So if you wouldn't mind Fi users, try your best to put your feelings into words (no matter how strange it may sound to the rest of us). I yearn to crack the code which is Fi!

A distinct facet of Fi is how private it is, and the reason for this is how hard the feelings are to express. Who wants to spend fifteen minutes to try to find words to express something that simply cannot be expressed perfectly with words (and it's very, very important for us to feel harmony between words and feelings), and then probably be dismissed for those since they make little sense outside of us? Being an Fi user means feeling deeply insulted when having our feelings derided or dismissed, and that means conflict, and in some cases long term grudges. One doesn't need to be an enneagram type nine to want to avoid that.

It's hard for me to express Fi without it being pretty polluted by Te most of the time. When I'm rolling Fi, I'm usually pretty angry. I see Fi as a rather angry function, because it's a very easy going function most of the time. That may not make sense at first, but look at it this way: Fi is silent when values are not being offended. When Fi comes out and makes itself known, something is wrong. So in short, when it's visible, Fi is angry.

Since my Fi usually is trapped squarely under Te's heel, even things that offend my values are usually not hard to dismiss with a roll of the eyes, often an invisible one. It can take someone else prodding me with something offensive to bring that side of me out. Further, knowing my girlfriend is upset by something feeds into my anger toward it. Something I easily dismissed minutes ago gets my full attention and often my full displeasure.

OK, so uh... my feelings into words. I don't know if I can do that. I need context.

 

[AphroditeGoneAwry]

Interesting. I follow you on the angry thing. Like taking something personally. I wonder if Ti users are more likely to get irritable as well when others have a hard time understanding/following them?

And Ni and Si sort of seem to be 'above' others' opinions/concerns, don't they?

 

[greenfairy]

Interesting. I follow you on the angry thing. Like taking something personally. I wonder if Ti users are more likely to get irritable as well when others have a hard time understanding/following them?

And Ni and Si sort of seem to be 'above' others' opinions/concerns, don't they?

I know I do.

 

[AphroditeGoneAwry]

Maybe that is part of the reason my ex is/was always irritated with me.

 

[greenfairy]

I'm confused. I thought Fi users were hyperaware of their emotions, and so they had a pretty good understanding of them. So Fe users, even inferior Fe, are not that aware of their emotions unless they are triggered, but they don't understand them well? This is not a very clear distinction. I thought I use inferior Fe because sometimes I'm not very aware of my emotions and they get triggered sometimes and get out of control. Like, Fi dom would be consciously aware of emotions and what they mean and could deal with them well and T dom/aux would be less consciously aware of emotional things because their thoughts take up most of their consciousness. Am I right? It made sense to me to be Ti dom because I think all the time and when I feel something I have to put it into a thought in my mind in order to understand it. Like the unconscious emotion has to be filtered through the conscious thinking for me to process it. But, hearing about Fi being kind of unconscious anyway, I can kind of relate to the pictures and colors thing.

I dunno. Any clarity in this area would be appreciated, as I'm still trying to understand Fi to see if I use it.

 

[Lady_X]

There are things I have already thought through and know how I feel about them... Other things I'm not sure.

They have to be thoroughly thought through first.

Sometimes I may have a gut reaction like... A slight discomfort but I don't understand why yet so I have to think it through... To internally check the validity of that reaction. Or to perhaps expand my view on it... Look at it from other angles and then make up my mind.

This is done internally by my standards... My perception of what is right and good and important.
But yes sometimes.. Often... I don't know how I feel... And certainly can't verbalize it.

It is very much like ti in that it's highly important to be concise... To be accurate and to explore in depth and defined by your own set of principles.

 

[The Iron Giant]

I wonder if Ti users are more likely to get irritable as well when others have a hard time understanding/following them?

I have observed this in some. Any kind of introverted judgment is going to judge without an external baseline. That makes it internal, personal, and in a sense, automatic. Once the demand to put it into words arises, there can be a great deal of stress, because it's like translation when they have to go from something that is instinctively understood to something that is outwardly expressed. An Fi user knows when their values have been violated, but doesn't always know in what way. It manifests as that sickened feeling that something is wrong and must be either fixed or destroyed.

And Ni and Si sort of seem to be 'above' others' opinions/concerns, don't they?

I think I get what you mean, and yes, I think they do.

 

[Kayness]

I think [MENTION=15167]Stephen[/MENTION] made a really good post about it.

it's very, very private. Therefore it doesn't really get to come out much, and because of that, when the user decides to express it it just feels clumsy and awkward, which is also kind of discouraging.

 

[Ivy]

I think [MENTION=15167]Stephen[/MENTION] made a really good post about it.

it's very, very private. Therefore it doesn't really get to come out much, and because of that, when the user decides to express it it just feels clumsy and awkward, which is also kind of discouraging.

word.

whenever I try to translate fi into words, I always feel like it comes out as "Me have feeling, feeling feel good and bad at same time" or something.

 

[Lady_X]

^^ that's hysterical

And I'm all like that feeling you have when you're like 6 mo old and really want your blanket but someone takes it!!!

I have no effective way of communicating it. :/

 

[Lady_X]

^^ that's hysterical

And I'm all like that feeling you have when you're like 6 mo old and really want your blanket but someone takes it!!!

I have no effective way of communicating it. :/

 

[Viridian]

Are all Fi users this attuned to their feelings? Like, do you never unconsciously block them for whatever reason?

 

[Ivy]

To be honest, I don't know how to block feelings, consciously or unconsciously. Maybe I do it without knowing it, but I don't think so. I usually feel like there is no (or an inadequate) space between me and my feelings, I have no choice but to feel them fully and in the moment. Other people seem to be able to put off experiencing a feeling or bury them entirely- I lack that skill.

Somebody smart once theorized that language serves as a buffer between your psyche and your feelings. You feel things more acutely when you don't have the words to express the feeling. Now, I make a living using language to express things, even feelings sometimes, but a lot of what I feel is ineffable.

 

[Grublet]

I think everyone here is really cool and nice to me and I want to be friends with everyone here.

 

[The Iron Giant]

Somebody smart once theorized that language serves as a buffer between your psyche and your feelings. You feel things more acutely when you don't have the words to express the feeling. Now, I make a living using language to express things, even feelings sometimes, but a lot of what I feel is ineffable.

I have to agree with this. I've even seen the advice to "talk your feelings out" in a few places, including in a very cool book I've been reading about mindfulness meditation. The idea is that, biologically, we are not able to be in a fully panicked state while we're accessing language... they run in conflict to each other in our brains, which is why we behave irrationally when we're upset. As soon as we take the time to digest what we're feeling and speak it in words, we've already shut off the part of our brain that runs all that chaos.

 

[The Iron Giant]

I think everyone here is really cool and nice to me and I want to be friends with everyone here.

Of course you do, you're an ENFP and a type two! Feel free to add me.

 

[Kayness]

This is how a Fi user usually express their feelings:

Unhappy that I am, I cannot heave
My heart into my mouth: I love your majesty
According to my bond; no more nor less.
Cordelia, Scene I

from King Lear.

 

[The Iron Giant]

This is how a Fi user usually express their feelings:

Unhappy that I am, I cannot heave
My heart into my mouth: I love your majesty
According to my bond; no more nor less.
Cordelia, Scene I

from King Lear.