[ENFJ] Calling all ENFJs!

[AStrange~Nostalgia]

You sound depressed to be honest.

it`s true that I`m trying to get rid of depression that basically I have no idea where did it come from and it took me 2 years to actually realize the problem and *partially* understand where this feeling come from and actually admitting my real feelings.

and I`m trying not to run any more like you said ,however, I keep loosing the grip and hence losing the good results which I achieved , and slipping away from responsibilities even though I loved them and enjoyed them; but I lost passion in most things , and passion is how I measure progress ;the more things I regain my passion about ,the better I`m living.

and I never imagined myself old in heart ,but in mind ,wisely. and to actually see myself genuinely feeling and seeing life like an old lifeless heart when I`m barely 20 years old brings tears into my eyes. but I never give up , because giving up is not me, and giving up after you have just survived will kill ten times harder .


the fact that I`m writing my conclusion (feelings") makes it more encouraging for me to open from deep inside for more discovering of the problem and the real me which I desire the most .and to state a fine conclusion I found for myself, that actually keep recalling what I wrote in Bold gives me inner true bright hope and each time just saying it ,it heals parts of my soul.

I truly never claim to have a tough life , but laziness put me here in the first place :I can achieve my goal any time so no need to hurry -till it`s too late.'i just finished a tiring last year of school so I need to rest' , and it`s never enough resting. true that I learned a lot of new things that I always wanted to learn . but I kept myself too busy from my real troubles ,so basically I knew how to solve overthinking depression but I used it too much till it became opposite of cure.

but I thought, away from unhealthiness, I thought maybe it`s an ENFJ thing , that since I was in first grade I rarely studied the entire book , it just felt unnecessary .and I had good memory from class that I know half the book without studying good for me. but being unhealthy took away ALL the concentration from me (which is a problem) .

sorry if it`s long , but I feel refreshing right now .thanks for asking <3

 

[SearchingforPeace]

This thread might be useful to some: https://www.typologycentral.com/for...446-abyss-inferior-ti.html?79446=#post2538490

ENFJs are often in the abyss, which looks like depression. We look at ourselves and only see the negative, and can't see what everyone else sees in us.

Ex.: Today at my church, an older man that I am acquainted with (80 something) was sitting a couple rows back in the sanctuary. I said "Good morning, how are you?"

He responded with an empathic "Not as good as you are this morning!"

It was not an easy morning, getting the children ready for services. I sure didn't feel good and happy and peaceful inside.

So I responded, "How do you know I am doing better than you? You seem to be doing quite well."

He responded, "Everything about you screams happy and doing well, especially how you manage your children." I was shocked, and just nodded. I didn't need to argue with him.

Besides, I often seem to be less understanding of how I appear to others. I have, on occasion, let down my guard and looked at a mirror, just to see what I am feeling. I almost always keep the external presence up and just suppress internal issues.

As Fe doms, it isn't fake to present a contrary external emotional state compared to our internal state. We feel our emotions externally and so they are valid. Fi space, that deep internal emotional zone, is strange and painful for Fe doms to explore, just like FPs often struggle with FJs.

 

[AStrange~Nostalgia]

Recently I have been interested in the defrence between P/J personalities and how do they deal with each other, and what does it look like when a J is using the P side of him (especially in an unhealthy way).
So I would be thankful if you elaborate .

 

[AStrange~Nostalgia]

This thread might be useful to some: https://www.typologycentral.com/for...446-abyss-inferior-ti.html?79446=#post2538490

ENFJs are often in the abyss, which looks like depression. We look at ourselves and only see the negative, and can't see what everyone else sees in us.

Ex.: Today at my church, an older man that I am acquainted with (80 something) was sitting a couple rows back in the sanctuary. I said "Good morning, how are you?"

He responded with an empathic "Not as good as you are this morning!"

It was not an easy morning, getting the children ready for services. I sure didn't feel good and happy and peaceful inside.

So I responded, "How do you know I am doing better than you? You seem to be doing quite well."

He responded, "Everything about you screams happy and doing well, especially how you manage your children." I was shocked, and just nodded. I didn't need to argue with him.

Besides, I often seem to be less understanding of how I appear to others. I have, on occasion, let down my guard and looked at a mirror, just to see what I am feeling. I almost always keep the external presence up and just suppress internal issues.

As Fe doms, it isn't fake to present a contrary external emotional state compared to our internal state. We feel our emotions externally and so they are valid. Fi space, that deep internal emotional zone, is strange and painful for Fe doms to explore, just like FPs often struggle with FJs.

After reading this , I didn't really relate to it . But then I saw it , that almost everyone sees us in perfect condition and envy us for that, when actually ,we think that we are missing alot and people look down at us .

Since we make enimes with people who envy us, I've always seen it but didn't believe , poeple actually looked at me with hate and always tried to hurt my self esteem and make fun of me, and disrespect me infront of everyone , while trying to put me in bad situations to make me look awful . And ALL OF THAT was actually because they where jealous of me (that's what I was told) and it was true.

They were people who thought I was perfect and I'm arrogant about it even though I was the most humble person in that room .

So for someone who had low self esteem I was shocked when I discovered all that.
Even when I was depressed I was 'lucky' enough to make more enimes . I mean REALLY!
At least your experement was good.