[Type 7] 7w6 retardation

[Stephano]

Lol, why do think that you are an INFJ? Are you new into MBTI? You really sound like the typical ExFP 7 so/sx girl.

 

[NKC]

[MENTION=10496]skylights[/MENTION]

thanks for the feedback

honestly it's because every time I have to bond with someone on such an incredibly deep level it's ridiculous. no relationship lasts forever, people either die or break up. and so I consciously try to intellectualize every experience (including relationships) and if a relationship ends, logically I'm fine. But I'd be lying if I didn't admit there wasn't this movie real playing in my head. It's like whiplash. When you get in a car, and you're driving and moving forward, and then hit a brick wall. your head is still moving forward. Or when you lose a limb a lot of people will say that they feel as though it's still there. there are some type of photographic materials too, that will even show a faint hue of where the missing limb once was. It's like that in my head.

So when someone still respects and cares for me but doesn't have the same affections as once was, I still carry on as if they give a shit.

Ironically, I'm quick to move on but there is a part of me that doesn't. It's as if I set myself up. I realize this. Not sure why though. It's like I am in my own way, stopping myself from obtaining the very thing I want (close connection) by choosing people that are not capable or wanting to give what I need. I suppose I seek reassurance a lot. I don't need to be validated, I'm fully aware and independent in that emotional regard. rather, I always look to this outside party like, "is this okay? is this okay to need you or want affection from you?". It's nauseatingly pathetic and I kind of want that part to go away.

I'll literally counsel myself in my own head with narrations from people who once loved and cared for me. I tend to fall head over heels for people I look up to, respect and admire but I haven't ever really been in the position where those people made it clear they need or want me in any way. I hold back with physical affections until I feel it's safe but that is more from personal experience than typing. It's strange in that my logical mind is always constant and moving separate from my feelings. I analyze way to much.

I dissect everything and break everything a part till it's a bloody mess, and then I put it back together again. That's what I do in my head.

This is me tearing myself a part in case no one has caught on to that yet. I know. It's pretty sick and twisted, lol!

 

[NKC]

Lol, why do think that you are an INFJ? Are you new into MBTI? You really sound like the typical ExFP 7 so/sx girl.

Interesting because I have several close friends who would beg to differ. I really could care less what people consider me at this point. I don't really relate to any of the ENFP's I've ever corresponded with. In some ways yes, but in most ways not. I'm not so sure what to say over this mbti issue. I've been active online for nearly 2 years but with the same crowd who haven't pegged me as enfp.

To be honest, I'm tempted to just throw enfp up so people stop. because frankly, I don't care. I know who I am and why I'm here.

no I'm not offended. Just tired of it because I have other things on my mind I'd like to address.
I don't mean to come off as disrespectful or anything. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.

would it make everyone feel better if I just list enfp ? I don't mind. It appears to really be a problem for most here. as one woman stated, it's serious business. all I can say to that is ... okay. it isn't for me but apparently it is for you. and if it's important to you it's important to me, so I'll change my type. ya know what I mean? can you imagine being in my shoes right now? the entire purpose of this thread was severely derailed in my mbti type. frustrating to say the least.

 

[Stephano]

I don't really relate to any of the ENFP's I've ever corresponded with. In some ways yes, but in most ways not. I'm not so sure what to say over this mbti issue.
I know who I am and why I'm here.

You seem to be very confident with your type, but when I think about 10 months back I was as convinced as you that I'm INTP and a 5w4 as well. I only found out that I'm in fact ENFP through a cognitive functions test.
But the point that you don't relate to the ENFPs you met is quite persuasively. I got several responses from family members that I'm like my Dad (another ENFP) and my brother like my Mom (most likely INFP and ISFP). Also one of my best friends (surprise, he's ENFP) asked me why we are so similar. So there's not much doubt here about my type.

That's really interesting right now. I can't imagine how an INFJ 7w6 would be like IRL, maybe more reserved and less 7 on the outside. Have you compared yourself to other INFJs on this forum? How do you differ from them and how do you relate to them?

 

[Lady_X]

i would think a 7w6 of any type would relate to any other 7w6...at least a bit.

 

[ndovjtjcaqidthi]

Interesting because I have several close friends who would beg to differ. I really could care less what people consider me at this point. I don't really relate to any of the ENFP's I've ever corresponded with. In some ways yes, but in most ways not. I'm not so sure what to say over this mbti issue. I've been active online for nearly 2 years but with the same crowd who haven't pegged me as enfp.

To be honest, I'm tempted to just throw enfp up so people stop. because frankly, I don't care. I know who I am and why I'm here.

no I'm not offended. Just tired of it because I have other things on my mind I'd like to address.
I don't mean to come off as disrespectful or anything. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.

would it make everyone feel better if I just list enfp ? I don't mind. It appears to really be a problem for most here. as one woman stated, it's serious business. all I can say to that is ... okay. it isn't for me but apparently it is for you. and if it's important to you it's important to me, so I'll change my type. ya know what I mean? can you imagine being in my shoes right now? the entire purpose of this thread was severely derailed in my mbti type. frustrating to say the least.

You say that you "could care less" about what people think of you, but you get all emotional when someone "judges" you, and then you go and say that you'll change your type to make OTHER people feel better.

You say that your friends would never consider the possibility that you're anything but INFJ, but then you say that you constantly "edit" your personality to fit in. How well do your friends know you then?

... Waiting.

 

[NKC]

You seem to be very confident with your type, but when I think about 10 months back I was as convinced as you that I'm INTP and a 5w4 as well. I only found out that I'm in fact ENFP through a cognitive functions test.
But the point that you don't relate to the ENFPs you met is quite persuasively. I got several responses from family members that I'm like my Dad (another ENFP) and my brother like my Mom (most likely INFP and ISFP). Also one of my best friends (surprise, he's ENFP) asked me why we are so similar. So there's not much doubt here about my type.

That's really interesting right now. I can't imagine how an INFJ 7w6 would be like IRL, maybe more reserved and less 7 on the outside. Have you compared yourself to other INFJs on this forum? How do you differ from them and how do you relate to them?

I literally JUST finished a long 2 hour talk with an ENFP who knows me personally who is into typology as well. And no, he didn't think my type was wrong. We talked about Fi as well, and some spats we've had, and spats I've had with INFP irl friend. And I gotta say. Fi is NO. LOL! I don't think you intended to sound condescending, though it could have been perceived that way according to him. and there is that difference. I might see something as condescending or rude, but I don't care. It doesn't irk my feelings. He also said, to be fair I must admit he's right, that because I came on here LOUD and wrote as comfortable as I do on PerC, that that was no doubt off-putting. Wasn't my intention. More or less, it's like I'm in that "I'm on a mission" mode. And so I do apologize in that, I realize I'm super intense and disregard the larger picture sometimes when I'm on a mission (what purpose/thoughts/goals in my head).

We laughed at the idea that I can not stand surprises such as unplanned trips, and that I am NOT spontaneous and how this drives every P type I've ever known nuts! lol. We also talked about my impression of ENFP/INFP. You see, I have a love/hate thing with NFP. You guys crack me open like an egg, but then you rummage and make everything messy. I like order and symmetry and clean. It's like sloppy kisses. YUCK. gross. So it agitates me how NFP can probe. It seems so messy the way you think. Not you you. but ya know.

Anyways, whenever I stand next to an NFP. They seriously make me feel like shit. Fi from my experience is SO intense. That Fi just feels so INTENSE. I just can't relate to that at all. Notice also, the only kind posts here are mostly from NFP. You guys seem to internalize other peoples feelings and sympathize deeply. It's like, I have intense depth to my character/personality. But Fi seems to be this DEEP WELL of INTENSE feeling. and it's intimidating. It's like, what do I do with that? I adore it, and admire it, but there's no way to honor it because I just don't know how. I don't FEEL in that type of way.

This brings me to a point. The point that I really should recognize my arrogance. In that, I come on here with a goal, and I bust out this whole slue of thought without any regard that no one here knows me/my writing style etc. I suppose it's because I'm in a "problem solving" mode. And kinda don't care (feelings detached). But when other people get upset, I get upset. So I suppose I would only be right to recognize that and take it down a notch. Know that, if my life circumstances were different, I would preoccupy myself (distract myself) with taking on this "issue" and attempt to dissect it etc. in the way that I am. I can pick people's brains online so to speak, with the distractions of irl situation. If things were different, I would probably just be by myself reading copiously.

Finally, I realize whatever my type is, it isn't a common combination. I seem to have a pretty big storm behind my eyes always. I'm cerebral in nature. And so I look to online as an outlet, and an opportunity rather than a community. I suppose I'm an opportunist I don't hesitate to plug in and think/collect/think/learn online because it's different than in real life. In real life, I take great care to fit in, to do what I'm supposed to, to do what's right, to keep to myself and take careful attention to communication. There's a huge disparity between online / offline. Even skype, every time I've ever skyped with anyone from the forums, I get the same surprised response. I'm so outgoing but behind skype it's more in real life. And so I tend to be that version where it takes me a long time to warm up/ open up etc.

Anyways. I suppose I'm attempting to apologize and recognize my selfish demeanor. I hope no one takes it personal. I have no qualms admitting that I'm using you. LOL! Not in a malicious way! Anyone can use me too online for whatever my mind might be able to serve them with. I hope I didn't communicate my sentiments THAT poorly. I'm just being honest and I do care about people so please don't interpret this as an insult. I am probably not articulating this well at all. :/

On the subject at hand. I so far have concluded that I'm definitively a self preservation type. But I'm not so sure if I'm social or sexual with that, and in which order. From this point on, I think I have to accept the fact that I'm not going to get an easy answer overnight. (that's my impatient/lazy part of me that wants that ) So, I want to thank everyone for their input, the thread links and videos. I do appreciate the kind thoughts from some and authentic want to help solve the puzzle. I hope I don't seem super narcissistic stimming about talking about myself. It's really that in my mind, I just think it's a logical conclusion to make, that if I understand my motives/make up better, I might be able to resolve some internal confusion. I hope that makes sense.

regarding the quiz PM'd me. If I submit it to that person, I'm gonna just put it out there as a thread on PerC probably, or here. But I prefer to see every perspective and angle before drawing my conclusion as to what I feel fits and makes sense (to me, knowing all the private angles I'm not comfortable dishing out there). yeah, I know. I put SO much out there people tend to think that's it. *shrugs* not sure what to say other than, it is what it is. People are by and large simple to understand. A person on the other hand, is a little more complicated.

 

[NKC]

You say that you "could care less" about what people think of you, but you get all emotional when someone "judges" you, and then you go and say that you'll change your type to make OTHER people feel better.

You say that your friends would never consider the possibility that you're anything but INFJ, but then you say that you constantly "edit" your personality to fit in. How well do your friends know you then?

... Waiting.

well. I don't edit myself for friends. So I'm not so sure what to tell you. I have only a few people in my metaphorical bubble, lol. And yeah. I wasn't happy the minute everyone else was very apparently unhappy and disgruntled. So again, not sure what to tell you. Personally, I really am at a loss. The only people seeming to be the most irritated with my type, are other INFJ's here. Which is interesting considering, not one INFJ seems to feel the same on the other forum I frequent. I don't know. What do you want me to say? I don't know what you guys want from me. And that, has me kinda irritated to be honest. I feel like a T type who is being hammered with "how do you feel!" ... I don't know! I don't know what you want from me!!! LOL!

really now. this is a little ridiculous. So you don't think I'm an INFJ ... Okay!. Thank you for sharing.

 

[Stephano]

[MENTION=20059]NKC[/MENTION]
So you're saying you're different IRL than on the internet. Can you give me a brief insight into your personality? What makes you sure that you're an introvert an judger? What speaks for Ni and Fe?
Btw, what's your tritype or your instinctual variants? I think you have a 3-fix somewhere.

 

[NKC]

[MENTION=20059]NKC[/MENTION]
So you're saying you're different IRL than on the internet. Can you give me a brief insight into your personality? What makes you sure that you're an introvert an judger? What speaks for Ni and Fe?
Btw, what's your tritype or your instinctual variants? I think you have a 3-fix somewhere.

Introvert: (me traits): hates large crowds/bars etc. I can do low key bars w/ friends I trust and enjoy but short lived. I get tired and drained with crowds. I prefer small shin digs. I've always been one to have 1-3 best friends. I have trouble w/ superficial relationships but as an adult see the value therein and do my best to maintain acquaintances. I've learned to enjoy people generally on a deeper level but I am absolutely one who can bust out a list of things people do that irk me in a heart beat, lol. I keep to myself. I love being home. My preferred activities are either alone or w/ close friends. I need my space. Conflict drains me more than anything and I hate debating. All leaving me to conclude introverted feeler type.

Ni(me traits I believe to be as such). I'm an abstract thinker. I communicate mostly in metaphors and analogies. I'm elastic with my thinking. I cheery pick concepts here to put them there, where they serve their purpose for me. All my "ideas" I generate stem from life experience, stories heard or read, always coming from a central place. I collect. I organize my thoughts (albeit slowly) like a blender in my head, I'm a total spaz and collect and collect and chuck it in a blender to spin while I sleep. I wake knowing shit I don't get bad feelings but sometimes just "know". As an adult, I consciously wait to jump to conclusions. I lucid dream(always have) and often am understanding people on a very deep level.

Fe(me traits I believe to be so): I'm sensitive to the emotional environment, I pick up on people's feelings. I get upset if people around me are upset, I want to fix but have learned to focus rather on establishing boundaries. I'm incredibly animated with facial expressions and flailing hands. Talk soft unless I really like you and I'm excited to be talking to you, or unless it's a subject I know a lot about or am excited about. Strangers think I'm shy. Friends can't shut me up. Online is a loop hole I'm greedy like that, lol! I like to pick brains. I want to know how your feeling. I want to express my feelings. Let's talk about that. Let's problem solve these feelings. Maybe it's this. Maybe it's that. Theories. Hypothesis. Game plans to get better. I'm there for everyone's problems. I have problems no ones there. *crickets* fuck it. Go online. Sounding board and medium/outlet. I don't open up my problem to irl people. I don't want to burden them, I don't want to bother them, I want them happy at my own expense (problem solving this shitty trait probably made me a core 7, lol! ) I give. I give too much. I don't love the way my Fi friends love. I'm more cerebral regarding love. Fi makes me feel like I'm cold and mean or maybe guilty. Idk. I do deeply connect with people but because it's different maybe, It's exhausting and annoying(sometimes) I wish I didn't need to feel loved but I do. I like helping and making people feel good, feel happy, feel better. I'm certain enng lays in here somewhere.

J(me traits): I hate surprises. I prefer plans. I strategize.(most of which are kept to self), I have experience with doorslam abrupt brash judgements. I've grown more balanced(I hope). I know what I like. I know what I don't. I dont go with the flow well. I want to know what's next. I place judgments on things after I've thought of them a long time. When people (not this convo) but when my conclusions are challenged without a logical easy going approach, I'm irritated. It's like dude! At least take me out to dinner first. Geez. Don't you know I'm a brat joking. Maybe. I hope. lol!

Categorical thinking. I consciously try to soften. I poke fun of my tendencies and weaknesses. I enjoy analyzing people's emotional garbage, understanding, then regurgitating it in a very logical smooth way (with humor depending on) so as to empower them, give them hope, to remind them they're not alone and that it's okay. I've different life experience. Doesn't make me special. Just harsh super harsh life lessons, for lack of a better articulation. You would never meet me, or know me, I'm quiet. I keep to myself unless I like you. You know I must REALLY like you if I seek you out to interact if I don't necessarily HAVE to. I've been told many times I had a bitch look or "death glare" but I don't even know I'm doing it. I was just looking at the people in the room! Geez! I worked to be better and be more at ease in uncomfortable social scenarios.

Game plan: work restrictions till first of year. Continue being me, being happy and occupy my mind. From now till then, figure out why my love life is nothing short of a nightmare. Maybe grow some hypothetical extroverted make shift balls to get out there. No online. No long distance. I need in real life holding hands cheesy bullshit so. Go on forum. Use it for what it's worth. Figure out my dysfunction. First of year, get some money, make more money. Continue to save and plan move. Move. Situate self. Be a no one. Meet a some one special. Live happily ever after, no more kids, I tame myself enough so the poor man doesn't shove a pencil in his ear or gouge his eyes out. It might help if he's partially deaf.

Pretty sweet plan huh? LOLOL!!