Okay, ygolo, I'm looking at this thread, and it doesn't look to me like the technical aspect of writing is very important to your aims.
You can't look at 'how to write' books. You've got to look at what you're trying to do, and how you're trying to do it. The way I write usually involves finding a concept I find interesting and want to explore, and planting it in brainsoil to see what, if anything, grows there. This means my writing process usually involves lots of false starts, lots of drafts, and lots of notes and lots of research. I'm going to be looking at some things about structure that experts say about fiction because I want it to be read and liked, but mostly while exploring I'll be trying to look for things that will make sense to be there and things that will be emotionally satisfying. So that's basically how it goes for me.
Perhaps, I am being to reliant on others advise, but I believe myself good at seperating the good from the bad when it comes to this, and learning from other's mistakes is almost always a time-saver.
What I am trying to do is two-fold:
1) Get in touch with subtler emotions and the sub-conscious.
2) Communicate the themes clearly enough to an audience of "others" to see how close to THE subconcious I've gotten to.
It is my belief that what is deeply unconscious and subjective is in a way universal and objective. I want to tap into that aspect of the psyche.
What you're doing is completely different, probably completely different from what most people answering this thread are doing. You're trying to develop your subtler emotions or whatever. You're not trying to entertain others, or teach a lesson, or anything, or if you are, it's secondary and much less important than the goal of developing your emotions. Right? If it's just about developing your 'dreams,' then you might want to do journaling instead of creative writing (not just about what you did that day), or just stream-of-consciousness without an end in mind. That way, when writing, you won't be so distracted by writing conventions and will get right to the root of your goal. Yes, there are a billion books on writing, a billion sites telling you how to develop characters or plot or setting or whatever. You really don't need that for what you're trying to do, it's just going to get in your way.
Relating to an audience is important for me for reason 2) given above.
I already do journal quite a bit. This is meant for a more complex and challenging therapeutic reasons.
I am having trouble understanding the difficulty of simply making up a story. There is no need to ask for advice regarding this. I am one of these people who can make-up stories on the spot. So to me, I see no challenge in simply putting into writing what I am making up.
In kindergarden, I had to give a recital about some fable to the K through 8 auditorium. But I didn't know that I had to do this, so I was unprepared. They called my name to do the recital, and I was completely surprized. I went on stage an decided that instead of giving a recital, I would simply make up a story about a Gorilla and a Taxi xab driver. i have no idea if it was good or not, but I had little trouble comming op with a rather complex story with a moral even. Growing up, my little brother used to ask me for bed-time stories often. I had little trouble making them up as I went along.
Fiction is not the same as 'dreams.' Dreams don't have to make sense -- in fact, most of the time, neither does reality. Fiction does. Fiction has to make both logical and emotional sense to draw in your readers. Because of this hyperreallistic consistency that needs to be put into it, it's probably not the best place to find those emotions that have been hidden from you.
I thought it was the other way around. Dreams and reality do make sense. We don't necessarily know why they do, nor what sense they make, but they generally do make sense.
But I do think I understand what you mean. With dreams, the events are the events, you draw the sense from them if you can. While fiction needs to be coherent in its construction.
Then think about what I want to do as translating the cohesion inherent in dreams into a story that parallels it in a work of fiction that an audience can understand.
Now, if I missed something crucial about your request for help, tell me, I'm sorry. But, from reading this thread, I think that stories are not the outlet you're looking for.
Perhaps I can describe it as a 3 phase process (with plenty of overlap in phases):
1) Getting in touch with the sub-concious
2) Making logical and emotional sense of it
3) Relating that sense to an audiience
I am already good at 1), if I learn 3), then I can get validation of 2).
I see this as a parallel of engineering/science work:
1) Gather data from experiment based on analysis
2) Formulate hypotheses, analysis, new experiments, designs, and theory from the data
3) Relate what is learned to peers and laypeople
Phase 3) is important to validate phase 2).