lol following OrangeAppled's suggestion, I found this gem of a journal entry from 2003:
"So I was flipping through the latest issue of Spin (only $8 for a year's subscription!) and noticing gratuitous references to on-line trends such as file sharing, Friendster.com, and the return of Napster. Suddenly a disturbing revelation occured to me: all of the "with it" hipsters are on the Internet and only dorks who are behind the times get this info from magazines. When did this 180 in youth culture take place? But nevermind. There's more important things to think about. Like my low-paying job.
My manager, whom we'll refer to as Peg Leg, is drunk with the power of ruling over surly teenagers and underachieving adult losers. I know this because he uses up an astonishing amount of his paltry brain thinking up more interesting ways to cover my innocent little lizard tattoo, such as wrapping my forearm in a ripped piece of beige material (circa World War II) and fastening it up with safety pins and scotch tape. You're right, Peg Leg! That looks so much more professional! Peg Leg often speaks of firing employees for such dastardly crimes as putting too much mozzerella cheese on the pizzas. How dare those damn kids attempt to make our cardboard-like food product more appetizing for the customer? And Baby Boomers wonder why Generation X has such low ambition about stepping up and taking their own petty, meaningless position in a world ruled by salaried robots, such as our friend Peg Leg.
Working with children isn't nearly as bad as I first assumed it might be. In fact, tolerating the kids is a breeze compared to dealing with their yuppie parents. Imagine three women, dressed head to toe in Tommy Hilfigger clothing, who have also never worked a day in their life, blaming me for out of stock items at the prize counter. Glaring, one rather plain 30-something Summerlin hausfrau assumes her irritating role, not as a parent but as a fucking breeder and sighs, "You get the kids hopes up and then let them down." Oh! You're absolutely right madam! I am single-handedly responsible for the American greed culture that entitles your spoiled brats to think that they deserve every little piece of crap created by a seven year old in a Thai sweat shop for two cents per day that they set their beady little eyes upon! I'm also responsible for the decisions of a corrupt, monster corporation that "cares" so much about it's clientele that they don't even bother to keep coveted items in stock. Yes! That's right! Take it out on me, a helpless cog in the wheel of Capitalist, consumer-driven culture that doesn't even make enough money to reasonably live on. Meanwhile, when Peg Leg the drooling mongoloid is called over for assistance, the women begin behaving like polite adults instead of the overgrown adolescents that they obviously are.
However, my job is easy compared to many and I should be thankful that I am even working in a time when so many cannot find employment. As long as I wear my war-wound bandage and stick to the cut tables, everything will be o'tay!"
lol I know this has nothing to do with analyzing my functions