AphroditeGoneAwry
failure to thrive
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2009
- Messages
- 5,585
- MBTI Type
- INfj
- Enneagram
- 451
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/so
Curious: I've noted the same thing. INFJs in real life seem to like me very well, even though we approach things with slightly different priorities. Online, the tertiary Ti seems to kick in and not a few are easily offended by remarks that were never intended to insult. I don't get this "easily offended" vibe from all online INFJs, just a few.
As for affinities, in no particular order ...
No real affinity for INTJ - I understand them very very well, but there's not much to make a connection with, which is what you get when two anti-social people try to be social. However, when I click with an INTJ, it really clicks until we get bored of each other.
High affinity for xNFP - They shine so brightly, even if the world is somewhat less orderly after they pass by.
I'm also rather partial to xSFP - Genuinely warm, often good dancers.
xNFJ - I like and respect, especially in real life. I always feel welcome in their presence, and many such people seem drawn to me. Online, as I mentioned above, some self-declared xNFJs seem to be a bit pricklier. I believe my Mom was INFJ.
xNTP - very cool and fun to talk with, especially in real life. Not so fun to work with, and online conversations get muddled.
ENTJ - I understand 'em but it's kind of like INTJs, I usually don't want to spend time being buddy-buddy with 'em. Kind of the opposite of xNTPs - great to work with, as communications are always clear, but not so fun to shoot the breeze with.
ESTJ - Not as bad as you might think (from an intuitive's perspective)
ESTP - Also not as bad as you might think. *waves at Whatever* :hi:
ISTJ - I usually mistake these folks for INTJ, until I'm exposed long enough to get the underlying S vibe.
ISFJ - the real life ones I know of are sweet, but I don't have a good sample size.
ESFJ - I married one, and am now divorced. I don't dislike her, and I truly did love her, but in spite of very similar values and interests, communication difficulties killed it.
ISTP - fairly cool online, remarkably annoying in real life (at least the ones I know); no good way to resolve disagreements.
I shall now close with a disclaimer: type has nothing to do with whether you like people. It really doesn't. We like people for other reasons. Type comes into play as people get closer, and communications are trickier, less formalized. MBTI types can help you work around the communication difficulties if you let it, and you are the one who decides to adapt to the other's mode(s) of communication. And it doesn't matter if you have an ideal match, like ENFP with INTJ: you won't necessarily like each other, you won't necessarily share any interests, you won't necessarily understand each other. Rather, if you like each other, the MBTI types will help guide your understanding of each other.
I really like how you described your preferences. And I like your final distinction about how mbti helps you work through communication difficulties. I've definitely found that to be true, more than any sort of discrimination. In fact, if new friends or family don't subscribe to the MBTI thing, I sort-of get bummed because I know that they won't quite know my nuances, or understand them, nor appreciate how well I know them, like they might if they understood personality typing.