Golden_Cherry
New member
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2014
- Messages
- 11
The reason I feel I'm having such difficulty deciding whether I am ISTJ or ISFJ is because when I'm not living in my head, I seem to behave more like an ISFJ whether I like it or not, but I don't know if this is due to low confidence or Fe. I am rather sensitive to criticisms about my work or if I make a mistake. I can easily get depressed due to feelings of inadequacy and embarrassment. When I'm fond of someone (particularly an authority), their opinion of me is very important and I hate upsetting them or making a poor impression. My feelings also tend to be more subdued rather than come out in dramatic outbursts. I hate expressing what I'm feeling, but sometimes it shows on my face or unbidden tears will come on. When someone is emotionally hurt or a victim, I will do things for them to cheer them up or will want to comfort them (even if I'm not that great at it). I'm more likely to be constructive and help people than look down on them in an arrogant way. I don't like receiving too much recognition or "mushy" affection, and I don't like being called "sweet", even though it happens. I also have a moral tone when I speak, although it surprises me and REALLY bothers me when this comes out because it happens without thinking and gets in the way of what I truly believe intellectually. I do not like working in groups because I hate accomodating other people when I have a certain way I want to do things, but will do so anyway to avoid conflict. I actually get really annoyed by talking to other people, and I don't have a need to make friends or fit in. I also have a "live and let live" type of mindset, but personally I don't try to stand out and sometimes I act like I don't think this way. At work, I don't usually think about the customer at all and just do what the rules say instead of trying to make a compromise or even caring about their issues. I feel that I use Te more than I use Ti and am all about the need to be accurate and understand the objective truth of the matter, but my feelings sometimes get in the way, and when I act like myself, I don't feel like it aligns with who I am internally. I connect my mind with my identity, not my outward behavior. For example, confrontation makes me extremely uneasy, but if someone says something logically inconsistent or there is a flaw in their reasoning or facts, I feel a strong need to challenge them. I try to focus on thinking rather than feeling because it seems more relevant most of the time and I value it more. I am drained by using either one too much, but I feel more comfortable when I am discussing thoughts and am being impersonal. My dilemma is that what is natural for me does not seem to be what is most comfortable. What are some differences between ISTJs and ISFJs to help me figure out which one I am?