I'd say INFJs are one of the least forgiving of all the types, with some caveats.
Small things I can forgive relatively easily. I don't get easily offended by inconsequential power plays or failure to follow social niceties or things of that sort that some other types seem to bristle at. If I feel that the other party is not being mean-spirited, I usually let things slide.
HOWEVER.
The bigger, make-me-cry type of things in which I feel the other person was being vicious.... Oooh I hold onto that for years. It's rare for me to forgive serious, emotional betrayals like backstabbing or abandonment. It's like I'm a very caring, emotionally open person until a sacred line is crossed and then I shut the other person out forever.
I can forgive if the other person truly feels sorry for his/her words/actions. Although the memory remains... It's like Hijynx said, it's not about planning a revenge, it's more personal thing, like a lesson learned about the human nature.I'm more of a grudge person. Not saying I plot revenge or let it bother me to the point of burden (hence the need for forgiveness in some people). I just think it's important to remember the burn.....for self preservation reasons.
I'm more of a grudge person. Not saying I plot revenge or let it bother me to the point of burden (hence the need for forgiveness in some people). I just think it's important to remember the burn.....for self preservation reasons.
Or a poor memory.Precisely. And if you are going to choose to 'forget' the burn, one does so as a leap of faith. Second chances depend upon faith entirely.
Or a poor memory.
As a general rule, I think both INFJs and INFPs remember details about their interactions with people. We can remember both the good and the bad without trying too hard. It has surprised me that not everyone does this. Other people forget former interactions with people as easily as I forget what other people were wearing last week. I don't typically forget much that ever held my attention, so I remember the good experiences as well.
I voted INFJ because I think INFPs are more likely to hold grudges which is something that is somewhat foreign to me.
Sometimes i wonder whether you are a e6.
I hold grudges. Don't know if this is related to Fi or Se or simply NTR.
My mother is an Fe type and she can brutally insult you one moment and act like the nicest person in the world the next. I find it kind of insulting, to be honest, especially when she makes the excuse that her insulting me was influenced by her anger and what she said was not the truth. Bullshit. I believe that you reveal your true self and your true feelings when you surrender to your emotions.
I hold grudges. Don't know if this is related to Fi or Se or simply NTR.
My mother is an Fe type and she can brutally insult you one moment and act like the nicest person in the world the next. I find it kind of insulting, to be honest, especially when she makes the excuse that her insulting me was influenced by her anger and what she said was not the truth. Bullshit. I believe that you reveal your true self and your true feelings when you surrender to your emotions.
I have always thought that part too. However, I have recently learned otherwise.
My wife when angry will say horrible things, usually the opposite of what she really means, but I only just realized that.
So, now I that I realize she is just throwing shit out to hurt me (mostly), I don't fret so much about her words.
And my wife is a Fi type......
My mother is an Fe type and she can brutally insult you one moment and act like the nicest person in the world the next.
My wife when angry will say horrible things, usually the opposite of what she really means, but I only just realized that.
but i don't think it comes down to type but the person and their experiences. some other INFPs would be quicker to forgive than me and some INFJs would be slower, and vice versa.