2XtremeENFP
New member
- Joined
- Jul 23, 2008
- Messages
- 446
- MBTI Type
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 3w4
Haven't posted in this SP forum much, but I need some advice to give my friend..
She's an ESxP (pretty positive it's F, but she takes pride in the fact that she's always referred to as a 'b*tch') and she's dating her long time friend of 8 years, an ISTP.
I am not too knowledgeable about ISTPs, and I need to know some things about them.
Their relationship seems to be failing. He's way too 'careless' 'unemotional' 'uncaring'. He never enjoys himself, especially if we do ANYTHING that involves people. Nothing to him is ever fun, or worthwhile. If you spend a day with him, I can't tell you how many times you hear him critique someone/something or talk about how annoying something is. He is a cloud of bitterness.
They never do anything besides hang out at his house. She thinks of cute dates or even dates that are 'guy-ish' that he still won't do. He thinks they're dumb, pointless, or too expensive. Even cheap-no-cost dates are out of the question--like taking a walk through a park!!
Now, their big problem is him not letting her in emotionally. They also see each other only 2 times a week, and they live only about 15 minutes away. He never ever invited her over, she always has to invite herself. He doesn't act like he cares about her. If he has a bad day at work, he doesn't want to see her. She worries that if she never asked to come over, she would never ever see him.
When they argue, he gives her a run around. "There's no point in arguing. I love you" is his main phrase. Or "What's the point of arguing, this happened one time..." So its like he fails to see her point of view, or even chooses to ignore whatever conflict occurs.
Is this typical of ISTPs? Is this just him? Is she not understanding ISTPs? Is there something I could give her to help her?
She's an ESxP (pretty positive it's F, but she takes pride in the fact that she's always referred to as a 'b*tch') and she's dating her long time friend of 8 years, an ISTP.
I am not too knowledgeable about ISTPs, and I need to know some things about them.
Their relationship seems to be failing. He's way too 'careless' 'unemotional' 'uncaring'. He never enjoys himself, especially if we do ANYTHING that involves people. Nothing to him is ever fun, or worthwhile. If you spend a day with him, I can't tell you how many times you hear him critique someone/something or talk about how annoying something is. He is a cloud of bitterness.
They never do anything besides hang out at his house. She thinks of cute dates or even dates that are 'guy-ish' that he still won't do. He thinks they're dumb, pointless, or too expensive. Even cheap-no-cost dates are out of the question--like taking a walk through a park!!
Now, their big problem is him not letting her in emotionally. They also see each other only 2 times a week, and they live only about 15 minutes away. He never ever invited her over, she always has to invite herself. He doesn't act like he cares about her. If he has a bad day at work, he doesn't want to see her. She worries that if she never asked to come over, she would never ever see him.
When they argue, he gives her a run around. "There's no point in arguing. I love you" is his main phrase. Or "What's the point of arguing, this happened one time..." So its like he fails to see her point of view, or even chooses to ignore whatever conflict occurs.
Is this typical of ISTPs? Is this just him? Is she not understanding ISTPs? Is there something I could give her to help her?