My last five years have been spent teaching on an Indian reserve where there is a lot of dysfunction and unhappiness for a variety of reasons. In many cases, there may only be one person in the family who is not dealing with addictions and most people have major traumas in their lives there on a regular basis: untimely deaths, poor health, abuse, violence etc.
I have seen some kids that would thrive if they were to be taken out of their current situation and many of the symptomatic problems they are experiencing (using pot to cope, being in unhealthy relationships, disengagement with school, etc) would also improve. In many cases though, even if it were an option, the kids that have had an opportunity to get out often return because they want what is familiar and they want their own people to love and care for them.
In your case, things are not going to change right away for you, so instead, you need to learn how to adapt to your circumstances. Fortunately, people are incredibly resillient. You have also recognized some of the root problems and are working to change them. That's a huge part of making your own world better.
1. Find some caring adults who you can look to for healthy emotional attachment. Right now your parents and family are not able to provide what you need from them. Our brains require strong emotional attachment to someone or they are unable to get on with the business of emotional maturity and adaptability, so you need someone you can get that from. People your own age are not going to be able to love you unconditionally and they also are absorbed in their own problems and are not mature yet themselves. You can look for this through a church, school, or perhaps in a community organization.
2. Find a positive outlet for developing your skills and figuring out who you are. The fact that you haven't completely numbed your feelings is a healthy and a good sign, even if it creates pain for you. It means that your emotions can continue to function as they should and you will mature in the way you need to. You can speed up that process by looking for every way you can to develop confidence. One way of developing confidence is to start looking outwards at what you can contribute to other people or what you could learn from them. This will also help with the tendancy to hate/write people off. Everyone has something to teach us, whether through their bad example/bad qualities, or through what they have to offer. Volunteer, practice doing a lot of writing and drawing, discuss ideas with people here, travel when you can, learn to do new things. Practice seeing what you can get out of every conversation or interaction that you have with someone which will add to your store of abilities/knowledge etc. Try writing down the things that happen each day that you can be thankful for. By developing skills and a positive outlook, these will in turn connect you with other people, give you positive feedback from them, make you an interesting and valuable person and prepare you for whatever the next stage of life is.
3. Whatever you need to do now, do it well. Many people are worried about figuring out their whole life plan or solving all their problems at once. If you are a student, right now your job is to do the best that you possibly can at it (for your own sake, not your dad's!) so that you are ready when new opportunities come your way. Your parents have not been the greatest for you. However, you can be the best kid you can be for them, even if you recognize that you do not want to interact in some of the ways they may want to draw you into. Look for the family members who are the least difficult and see if there are ways to reach out to them. Work at building a circle of people around you who can also stand in as extra family for you. Start saving what money you do have now, so that when opportunities come along, you can take them.
4. Look at the things you can't change that you hate: it might be where you were born, things that have happened in your life, how you look (by the way you are very pretty, but we all have things that irrationally bother us), abilities you don't have etc. You will need to come to a place where you don't just distance yourself from those facts or try to alter what can't be altered, but rather find some reasons that they actually could change your life for the better. Your experiences will give you an empathy that no one else who hasn't experienced what you have could have for someone going through the same thing. You may develop insight and strength that you would never otherwise have found. You may be perfectly suited for something that you can't possibly foresee at this time. Your "deficiencies" might actually steer you towards people, work or great experiences that you would not have found, had things been easier for you.
Through my world view, I also believe that each of us were created by a wise and loving designer who has a purpose for each of us in this world. The experiences and the qualities that we have suit us perfectly for the kind of work we are given. We also are shaped by difficulties to have the rough edges of us worn off and to become what we ought to be. Even when we have been forsaken by everyone else in the world, God serves as a perfect parent, who gives peace that passes all understanding and who like a good parent, will carry our heaviest suitcases and bear the burdens of our worst problems for us.
5. Assess the things you can at this point which have been positive about where you grew up. Keep them and build on them. Look at what you didn't like about the way you've been raised and plan for how you can avoid them, rather than growing to hate or cut yourself off from the people who have perpetuated them.
6. Develop a philosophy/set of values through which you view the world and make decisions. Everyone needs something to go back to and measure against. In this way, your decisions and behaviour become consistent rather than random according to how you feel at the time. Feelings are important and must never be ignored, but they are also changeable and need to a logical framework to build them into. Good decisions can withstand scrutiny. Find wise people who have a stake in life going well to become a committee of "sober second thought" (that's what our senate is supposed to be for the country) so that if there is something you have missed, or useful outside information to be gained, they could be your go to people. You don't have to do what they say, but rather, consider their point of view so that you are sure that you have looked at your own choices from all angles.
I think you show a lot of maturity in recognizing the potential pitfalls you are facing and trying to be proactive. Keep on keeping on! We're rooting for you!