Dear God,
Are you really going to send half of humanity into a pit of eternal pain and suffering just because you're too lazy to bother making your existence known?
Wow, wheelchairdoug...really? I don't know where to begin with that. It combines all the worst misinterpretations of me into one concise little question.
First of all, I don't send anyone to hell. Didn't you ever have that one smug teacher that gave you an F and said, "I didn't fail you, wheelchairdoug...you failed yourself"? Well, I hate to say so, and I hope she's not reading this, but that teacher was right.
As to the second part of your question, you are the first person I've encountered that has attributed the mystery of my existence to sloth. How lazy do you have to be to not just wave and say, "Yes, I'm really here. Sup?" Are you saying that I'd put in all the work of creating the entire universe, but not say hi because I feel like watching a little TV instead? You may not
like my plan, but rest assured, it is a plan. Getting back to the point of your question, I find fault with your assertion that people go to hell because I do not reveal myself in plain sight. There are plenty of people in heaven, and I didn't send a singing telegram only to them. There is ample evidence for those who want to see it. It's true that everyone in hell was not explicitly told of my existence. But correlation does not prove causation.
Dear God,
Please don't destroy the earth.
Wait, I have to form that into a question...
Dear God,
What is, please do not destroy the earth?
Antimony,
Jeopardy! is my favorite show, too! That Trebek bugs me, though. When he reads the answer like he knew it all along, he sounds like he thinks he knows as much as me! I'd like to see how well his ass would do without those little blue cards!
But I digress. As I've mentioned before, I don't really DO things. I let things happen. And I'm afraid that, by the rules of the physical universe I've set up, eventually the Earth will be destroyed. The most likely cause will be the Sun expanding and burning the Earth to a crisp. Second most likely is a pandemic of antibiotic-resistant gonorrhea. Third is poison monkeys. On the bright side, you will be long dead by the time any of these happen. So take heart! And thanks for enjoying my creation enough that you don't want it to go away.