[MBTI General] Bloody INFPs and their capacity to turn INTJs into fuzzy hug addicts.

[souffle]

+3 on the ISFJ mother from this XNFP

Make that +4. (This is awesome!)

 

[Hazle Weatherfield]

I have absolutely no shame. I want to turn everyone into a fuzzy hug addict, although it doesn't necessarily have to do with majorly major relationships. I can manipulate (oh that's not the greatest word is it?) the most robotic of types to get cuddly. I LOVE cuddly and snuggly and so much more, but don't forget I love reason and logic and if I'm not great friends with you, you had better be gone by morning. Grrr.

 

[Amargith]

I find xNTJ to have gooey centers under their shells. Like M&Ms.

Warm them in your hand a bit and they melt all over

I'm an M&M addict..

I have absolutely no shame. I want to turn everyone into a fuzzy hug addict, although it doesn't necessarily have to do with majorly major relationships. I can manipulate (oh that's not the greatest word is it?) the most robotic of types to get cuddly. I LOVE cuddly and snuggly and so much more, but don't forget I love reason and logic and if I'm not great friends with you, you had better be gone by morning. Grrr.

 

[Bushranger]

Fuzzy INTJs can be adorable (so cuddly). I shall need to observe these INFPs in future and see if I can steal some of their mojo.

 

[JivinJeffJones]

No ISFJ mother for me. Maybe that's what's wrong with me.

 

[Udog]

I wonder if those with tough relationships with their mother grew up in a single home...

 

[Biaxident]

I wonder if those with tough relationships with their mother grew up in a single home...

No.

 

[songofcalamity]

Make it two....I love my ISFJ mommy . Of course we clash at times, but who doesn't clash with their mom sometimes. And I loved being kid. Happiest time in my life. Now the teen years...errrr....

I am the fifth one :hi:. I had a great childhood, wasn't condemned much for living in my imagination, shared my childhood with my INTJ sister, a nice family (ISFP mom and IxTP dad) and a xxFP baby brother who loves to cuddle. I couldn't ask for more.

And on the topic...

crap, I think I 'killed' an INTJ unknowingly. Looking back, I was the one who pushed him away and not the other way round. ........................... ............... and I walked to school with him every single day for months without realizing it. I was only aware of it yesterday, when a friend of mine commentated on it after much observations from her side, okay she put it more nastily - she said we looked like we were a couple walking to school together. WTFFF, I mean I know I see him daily at my bus stop and take the same bus, but I am grouchy and self-absorbed in the morning and I have never talked to him in the morning, so the couple thing came as shocked .... worse, now thinking about it, last week, my male best friend commentated subtly on it too. --- no wonder, I feel prickly stares, and when I turned immediately to look at the source, in a blink of an eye, it's gone. (his reflex was damm fast, if i didn't know, i would have thought i was hallucinating) although i will never ever forget the time when he killed me in chess with four easy steps, humiliation of all humiliations. but a person like that can't possibly like someone for that long, could he? I think I am trying to convince myself otherwise ............ just because I don't want to be labeled as the evil one.

 

[runvardh]

I wonder if those with tough relationships with their mother grew up in a single home...

Partially. My mother also has actual issues emotionally and had physiological issues that exacerbated them while I was growing up. I love my mother, I just have to watch my back, my wallet, and my blood pressure when around her. It doesn't help that she's ESFP, but I know enough healthy ones that I know that it is not the activating factor.

 

[Cranky]

And on the topic...

crap, I think I 'killed' an INTJ unknowingly. Looking back, I was the one who pushed him away and not the other way round. ........................... ............... and I walked to school with him every single day for months without realizing it. I was only aware of it yesterday, when a friend of mine commentated on it after much observations from her side, okay she put it more nastily - she said we looked like we were a couple walking to school together. WTFFF, I mean I know I see him daily at my bus stop and take the same bus, but I am grouchy and self-absorbed in the morning and I have never talked to him in the morning, so the couple thing came as shocked .... worse, now thinking about it, last week, my male best friend commentated subtly on it too. --- no wonder, I feel prickly stares, and when I turned immediately to look at the source, in a blink of an eye, it's gone. (his reflex was damm fast, if i didn't know, i would have thought i was hallucinating) although i will never ever forget the time when he killed me in chess with four easy steps, humiliation of all humiliations. but a person like that can't possibly like someone for that long, could he? I think I am trying to convince myself otherwise ............ just because I don't want to be labeled as the evil one.

Oh, we're capable of suffering in silence for years. I've carried torches for six, seven years at a time.

Also, we grow up getting told over and over again (especially FEMALE INTJs) that we need to moderate our honesty, not to hurt other people's feelings with our directness and mental capacity, and not to be so competitive.

If this INTJ dude beat your pants off in 4 moves in a game of chess, it's because he thought you could handle it, which is a compliment of the highest order. He didn't see you as the typically weak female who would go and sulk in a corner, but would instead enjoy seeing how his mind works. He was letting you into his strategies, not trying to hurt your feelings. This is VERY intimate to us, akin to...well, I don't really know what the equivalent for an INFP would be...maybe letting us see your feelings or something.

 

[Bubbles]

Oh, we're capable of suffering in silence for years. I've carried torches for six, seven years at a time.

Also, we grow up getting told over and over again (especially FEMALE INTJs) that we need to moderate our honesty, not to hurt other people's feelings with our directness and mental capacity, and not to be so competitive.

If this INTJ dude beat your pants off in 4 moves in a game of chess, it's because he thought you could handle it, which is a compliment of the highest order. He didn't see you as the typically weak female who would go and sulk in a corner, but would instead enjoy seeing how his mind works. He was letting you into his strategies, not trying to hurt your feelings. This is VERY intimate to us, akin to...well, I don't really know what the equivalent for an INFP would be...maybe letting us see your feelings or something.

I'd liken it to an INFP showing you their flaws. We hate criticism, so we trust you majorly when we do that.

 

[the state i am in]

I'd liken it to an INFP showing you their flaws. We hate criticism, so we trust you majorly when we do that.

absolutely. and especially e4 types, e4 + infp = shame, shame, and more shame.

it's difficult literally taking everything personally and then wrapping up your whole defense strategy and motivation system in "self-understanding." it makes new criticism and perceived hostility read as personal attacks, attacking your sense of self, your validity and value, etc. a very tough defense system until you have almost all your shit worked out, have settled on your final answer, and are pretty much stuck in solidly with your back feet firmly rooted into the ground like a tree.

the wing for 4s says that some will rely on knowledge/expertise/technicalcapability to provide this extra sense of structure, support, and defense, whereas others will use achievement, accolades, and worldly success to fortify their sense of self. but good god until that happens it sounds even more exhausting than my 5w4 designation.

 

[William K]

absolutely. and especially e4 types, e4 + infp = shame, shame, and more shame.

Yup. If I tell you something embarassing that happened or that I did a long time ago in the past that probably no one else remembers, it means I truly trust you as a friend

 

[will5250]

If this INTJ dude beat your pants off in 4 moves in a game of chess, it's because he thought you could handle it, which is a compliment of the highest order. He didn't see you as the typically weak female who would go and sulk in a corner, but would instead enjoy seeing how his mind works. He was letting you into his strategies, not trying to hurt your feelings. This is VERY intimate to us, akin to...well, I don't really know what the equivalent for an INFP would be...maybe letting us see your feelings or something.

I need to keep reminding myself of this difference between NTs particularly INTJ, and NFs particularly INFP. When an NF shares on a forum, he may feel like he is putting a piece of his soul out on the forum, and if people cut his words to pieces, he may feel like they are cutting him to pieces, where the NT feels like he is paying the NF a huge compliment by showing him how he can improve his statement. The NT's actions are showing that the NF is worthy of the NT's efforts. Do I have the NT side right? I have seen misunderstandings because of this difference on many occasions.

 

[will5250]

absolutely. and especially e4 types, e4 + infp = shame, shame, and more shame.

it's difficult literally taking everything personally and then wrapping up your whole defense strategy and motivation system in "self-understanding." it makes new criticism and perceived hostility read as personal attacks, attacking your sense of self, your validity and value, etc. a very tough defense system until you have almost all your shit worked out, have settled on your final answer, and are pretty much stuck in solidly with your back feet firmly rooted into the ground like a tree.

the wing for 4s says that some will rely on knowledge/expertise/technicalcapability to provide this extra sense of structure, support, and defense, whereas others will use achievement, accolades, and worldly success to fortify their sense of self. but good god until that happens it sounds even more exhausting than my 5w4 designation.

To me criticism, especially from significant others feels like rejection, or at least a lack of acceptance. I tend to hand out lots of acceptance to almost everyone, and crave to receive it, but that often seems to be a pipe dream. Criticism tends to communicate to me, "If you wish to earn my acceptance you cannot be yourself. You will have to change." Sometimes when I am depressed it looks like everyone else in the world gains acceptance merely by being genuine, but I'm not awarded that privilege. I once told an online INTJ friend about my craving for unconditional acceptance, and she informed me that I was destined to be disappointed all my life.

 

[Cranky]

I need to keep reminding myself of this difference between NTs particularly INTJ, and NFs particularly INFP. When an NF shares on a forum, he may feel like he is putting a piece of his soul out on the forum, and if people cut his words to pieces, he may feel like they are cutting him to pieces, where the NT feels like he is paying the NF a huge compliment by showing him how he can improve his statement. The NT's actions are showing that the NF is worthy of the NT's efforts. Do I have the NT side right? I have seen miss communications and misunderstandings because of this difference on many occasions.

This is absolutely 100% correct.

You misspelled "miss communications."

 

[Biaxident]

This is absolutely 100% correct.

You misspelled "miss communications."

He meant "Miss Communications".

 

[Cranky]

He meant "Miss Communications".

Then he was still wrong. (Er, INFP dude...you know I'm teasing, right?? :hi: )

I am Ms. DEMEANOR.

Ms. Demeanor - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[Biaxident]

Then he was still wrong. (Er, INFP dude...you know I'm teasing, right?? :hi: )

I am Ms. DEMEANOR.

Ms. Demeanor - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

He knows, and so do I.

Oh and, pick pick pick pick....


Or perhaps this would work better.

 

[Liminality]

I hath an ISFx mother, must be where the slight extraversion comes from...somehow...ish...