Oh God Not You!

[FDG]

Cos if so, there's nothing quite as depressing or party-pooping in my experience, as an ISFJ in a bad mood!

Yeah, I agree. An unhealthy ISFJ in a bad mood can suck the energy out of the happiest person on earth.

 

[BlackCat]

I've had LOTS of bad experiences with INTJ's. I'll definitely vote them for "emotional black holes" and "warmth black holes"

More for me.

 

[Scott N Denver]

More for me.

huh? I don't know what you mean. Youve had lots of bad experiences too, or if I don't deal with these people that will leave more of them for you to deal with, or something else?

 

[BlackCat]

huh? I don't know what you mean. Youve had lots of bad experiences too, or if I don't deal with these people that will leave more of them for you to deal with, or something else?

More INTJs for me.

 

[Scott N Denver]

More INTJs for me.

Please take them , ALL of them. Well, other than the maybe 3 of them I've met that seemed balanced.

From one male INFP to another, what do you see in them??? Again, most of the ones I've met have been in physics, making them even more of a "special" type of INTJ. Which reminds me of something I read. Where you WON'T find INTJ's: some place where there are lots of people and they are relaxed and having fun.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

Eek! I'm sure I've been this person when I'm not enjoying my surroundings. Mainly when I'm in a situation where I feel "obligated" to be somewhere I don't want to be or "have to" interact with someone I don't want to. I know I'm acting antisocial but I can't fake it. Ugh. I don't like feeling that way.

 

[Scott N Denver]

I I've almost never had problems with INTP's [or ISTJ's for that matter]. We both have intense internal processes that we don't feel a need to share, and can both leave the other alone to do their thing. When we want to talk, we are both open and unrushed. No pushy assertiveness, intellectual pissing contest, or "everyone else is SO stupid, they should all go study science, those dumb morons" kind of comments.

 

[BlackCat]

Please take them , ALL of them. Well, other than the maybe 3 of them I've met that seemed balanced.

From one male INFP to another, what do you see in them??? Again, most of the ones I've met have been in physics, making them even more of a "special" type of INTJ. Which reminds me of something I read. Where you WON'T find INTJ's: some place where there are lots of people and they are relaxed and having fun.

Well, first off they are IN types like we are. Introverts can tolerate each other and build up great relationships if they are into each other enough. Then you have that intuitive connection. The INTJs I've met, well, needless to say we've hit off almost instantly. It's that Te I think, along with the intuitive connection, that makes me really, really like them. And you know that you're cared for if an INTJ talks to you and likes your company, because they won't waste their time on you if they don't. I just seem to mesh really really well with them. I can pretty much talk to them about anything, and I like their viewpoints. When they like you they seem to be pretty non judgmental unless you ruffle their Fi. This attraction may be because I am attracted to Te in people. The INTJ women... I can't explain it... I just get this ridiculous feeling of attraction toward them. You can apply everything I just said to ENTJs as well for me, except the attraction is even more intense with them. But I like the two NTJs for different reasons, since they are quite different from each other.

Maybe this ties in with the fact that you like ENFJs and Fe types and I am absolutely repulsed by them.

 

[Scott N Denver]

Well, first off they are IN types like we are. Introverts can tolerate each other and build up great relationships if they are into each other enough. Then you have that intuitive connection. The INTJs I've met, well, needless to say we've hit off almost instantly. It's that Te I think, along with the intuitive connection, that makes me really, really like them. And you know that you're cared for if an INTJ talks to you and likes your company, because they won't waste their time on you if they don't. I just seem to mesh really really well with them. I can pretty much talk to them about anything, and I like their viewpoints. When they like you they seem to be pretty non judgmental unless you ruffle their Fi. This attraction may be because I am attracted to Te in people. The INTJ women... I can't explain it... I just get this ridiculous feeling of attraction toward them. You can apply everything I just said to ENTJs as well for me, except the attraction is even more intense with them. But I like the two NTJs for different reasons, since they are quite different from each other.

Maybe this ties in with the fact that you like ENFJs and Fe types and I am absolutely repulsed by them.

I've had them imply or say "your stupid" and "your feelings are stupid" and "your reactions are dumb" and "your such a wimp" and watched them ignore other people's feelings and push people around enough that I'm pretty soured on dealing with them. Hopefully yours are more open and well-balanced.

Many INTJ's I've met struck me as being *very* judgemental, often from things they have said, ie judging other people.

 

[BlackCat]

I've had them imply or say "your stupid" and "your feelings are stupid" and "your reactions are dumb" and "your such a wimp" and watched them ignore other people's feelings and push people around enough that I'm pretty soured on dealing with them. Hopefully yours are more open and well-balanced.

Many INTJ's I've met struck me as being *very* judgemental, often from things they have said, ie judging other people.

Well I'm not a very emotional person. I'm a sensitive person, but not really emotional. I don't show emotions a lot and I usually seem pretty neutral and detached. In real life I come off as an INTP sometimes, but not really. I'm just really not that emotionally expressive and I don't make decisions based off of emotion. That might have to do with this. I dunno, maybe you've just had some bad luck with some social retards? As long as an INTJ isn't judging me I'm cool with it, most of the time it's hilarious.

 

[poppy]

I've had them imply or say "your stupid" and "your feelings are stupid" and "your reactions are dumb" and "your such a wimp" and watched them ignore other people's feelings and push people around enough that I'm pretty soured on dealing with them. Hopefully yours are more open and well-balanced.

Many INTJ's I've met struck me as being *very* judgemental, often from things they have said, ie judging other people.

That's actually a pretty fair assessment. I consider myself pretty balanced but I know I can be very judgemental, even on a good day. Usually I don't say those things out loud, but I've been known to give people that look

In large groups (or in your case concentrated in a setting that plays to our strengths and doesn't force us to learn to play nice with others) I can imagine we could get pretty tiring. Likewise, I would get pretty tired of a room full of INFPs in a bad mood!

 

[BerberElla]

It'd be different based on the person they were dealing with. Different people find different people draining, irritating etc.

+1, I can be a black hole sometimes, so can my isfj friend though.

It's mood related, anyone in a bad mood, or throwing off negative vibes, is the black hole for that day.

 

[Virtual ghost]

I know that I can suck out all the fun out of something just by being myself. (if that counts for anything here)

 

[Totenkindly]

in regards to the OP:

I actually have had similar thoughts in terms of how to cast "psychological evil."

There are people who are like suns, who put out warmth and heat and help things grow who are exposed to them.

There are people who are literal vacuums, like an absence of truth and substance, who tend to unravel reality around them due to their distortions and lies, and these lies corrupt, sicken, and reduce the people around them... which isn't much different than a black hole of sorts.

 

[ThatGirl]

Do you guys think there could be pleasant black holes?

 

[Lauren Ashley]

Here is my Question:

Have you ever come across a "Black Hole"?

The person who absorbs all the energy in their surrounding environments.

What type do you think the black hole person would be?

Any strong extravert, although most likely an ExxP.

 

[King sns]

So I have been reading "A Brief History of Time" lately. And looking into physics as it pertains to interpersonal communications.

Here is my Question:

Have you ever come across a "Black Hole"?

The person who absorbs all the energy in their surrounding environments.

How would you describe a black hole personality?

What type do you think the black hole person would be?





*I have multiple theories on this which I may disclose after observing a few responses.

The deadbeat person who lays around and does drugs, (or even worse, does nothing at all..) works a lower end public job. (I'm not looking down on everyone with those jobs- I for one have those jobs, too. but these specific people hate it! they hate people! ) although they are old enough, have had perfect opportunities to find other jobs, or get an education, but have shot those opportunities down with lame excuses.. they want to be stuck where they are. They have no friends for the same reason. They have no kids. They don't go on vacations. They like TV. And dark walls and dark furniture. And kraft macaroni and cheese. (Don't get me wrong- I love macaroni and cheese, too. Especially with a little spoonful of mustard added in.. I digress.)
People who like to be stuck in ruts. They tend to talk a lot about bigger lives and better things that they want... goals that they have...but their negative Debbie-downer personalities are holding them back. NOT their life situations. There are people with terrible life situations- people who seem to have life taking a crap on them constantly- but can still have a better attitude then these black hole people..

The types that I have known that have done this are mostly I types- I think the bulk of them being isxx types- but have seen other types do it too.

 

[proteanmix]

So I have been reading "A Brief History of Time" lately. And looking into physics as it pertains to interpersonal communications.

Here is my Question:

Have you ever come across a "Black Hole"?

The person who absorbs all the energy in their surrounding environments.

How would you describe a black hole personality?

What type do you think the black hole person would be?

Ha, I just found this thread. Good one.

I don't like to say one type is more likely than another to be an emotional black hole. Like heart mentioned many psychological/emotional black holes are dependent upon individual interaction and chemistry. Some people are toxic and obvious and interact badly with nearly everyone. I actually don't consider these people black holes because they're relatively easy to avoid. Their reputation precedes them.

The black holes I've met tend to be the kind that blend in with the surrounding dark matter, which are how most black holes are unless they're gobbling up a sun or something. They're smart enough or maybe aware enough of themselves not to be that way all the time or only with a small group of people they feel like they can get away with it. This helps them because unlike the obvious type of black hole, the quieter ones can move from group to group finding new sources of energy to leech from with less detection.

I have the ability to be black hole, I've seen how my energy output can replenish or deplete. Because of this I'm pretty interested in the conditions that create these kinds of people, what the triggers are. I doubt you'll be able to get rid of them, but it's always nice to know the signs. Sometimes they're unavoidable for whatever reasons and it's better to know how to work around them until you can escape.

A good way to answer this question would be for people to think about ways they have or could be a black hole.

 

[kelric]

Have you ever come across a "Black Hole"?
The person who absorbs all the energy in their surrounding environments.
How would you describe a black hole personality?
What type do you think the black hole person would be?

I don't think I'd say that it's necessarily something that's driven by type much. Much more so on attitude and openness (which I'll define here to mean receptivity to the states of people around them). People who are down, but who can take a spark from others and lighten up aren't black holes. People who radiate doom and gloom irrespective of their company and said company's efforts to brighten things up can pretty much kill off any situation. People who consistently demand to be the center of attention can be black holes too.

I guess the only thing I'd say in how such things might relate to type would be the mechanism that the black hole uses to kill fun. Different fun-sucking, hope-killing strokes for different folks, I guess (score one for optimism! ).

Yeah, I agree. An unhealthy ISFJ in a bad mood can suck the energy out of the happiest person on earth.

I don't think that this is necessarily specific to ISFJ's, but from personal experience... hell yes. Like in a "you walk in the room and instantly start to cringe" way. Perhaps I'm just more vulnerable to the vibe unhappy ISFJ's give off, but yikes (happy ones, of course, I really enjoy being around).

A good way to answer this question would be for people to think about ways they have or could be a black hole.

Good observation, PM .

I think (unfortunately) that I can definitely be a black hole at times. Granted, one with a small event horizon (because, as Jock mentioned, I'm far more likely to be unnoticed than not). Two situations offhand that I have/could be a black hole (that I know of - feel free to add more):

1. Social Settings: - usually I blend into the background, but if I'm in an engaged, lively environment and called out on to "join in" - my awkward refusal/demurral can definitely kill the mood.
2. Professional Settings: - I can become the ultimate nitpicker and naysayer at times - I just don't let things go. If someone is glossing over an idea ("Oh, yeah, we haven't addressed that, but it'll 'work out somehow'"), I'm the one who says stuff like "Are you sure? What about X?". While I think I'm being constructive, it often kills the mood and sucks the life out of the meeting.

 

[lillyofthevalley]

So I have been reading "A Brief History of Time" lately. And looking into physics as it pertains to interpersonal communications.

Here is my Question:

Have you ever come across a "Black Hole"?

The person who absorbs all the energy in their surrounding environments.

How would you describe a black hole personality?

What type do you think the black hole person would be?







*I have multiple theories on this which I may disclose after observing a few responses.

Moody people you have to deal with on a consistant basis. My father was a black hole. When I walked into the house I could tell if he was angry even if he wasn't in the room, the air was that charged.

Extremely boring/no personality people can cause a black hole, if you are stuck with them for too long they will suck the lifeforce from your body.

I'm not sure MBTI really applies in these cases.