[NT] Does Sex = Love for NTs

[Ardea]

It's in Please Understand Me II.

Man... I really don't like having that "unfaithful" label... you're a 7, too... so... what are your thoughts on that?

 

[jenocyde]

I don't have frivolous sex with frivolous people. But I have had long term affairs of the mind and body. Mutual respect.

I would never cheat - I'd rather die than lose my honor.

I would not say that I feel love every time I have sex, or that it's even a prerequisite. Most times, I'm just thinking about getting off and making my partner get off. Love comes later, after the sandwich.

 

[Ardea]

I don't have frivolous sex with frivolous people. But I have had long term affairs of the mind and body. Mutual respect.

I would never cheat - I'd rather die than lose my honor.

I would not say that I feel love every time I have sex, or that it's even a prerequisite. Most times, I'm just thinking about getting off and making my partner get off. Love comes later, after the sandwich.

YES, YOU GET IT!!!!

OMG I you!!!!

 

[jenocyde]

YES, YOU GET IT!!!!

OMG I you!!!!

my sistah!!

 

[simulatedworld]

I don't have frivolous sex with frivolous people. But I have had long term affairs of the mind and body. Mutual respect.

I would never cheat - I'd rather die than lose my honor.

I would not say that I feel love every time I have sex, or that it's even a prerequisite. Most times, I'm just thinking about getting off and making my partner get off. Love comes later, after the sandwich.

That's pretty much it. Good work.

 

[01011010]

From Kiersey.com

Rationals tend to be faithful, with Masterminds (INTJ) the most likely and Inventors (ENTP) the least likely. As a rule, Rationals have a more manageable sex drive than other temperaments. Sex is still very important to them, but usually not as all-consuming except during the teen years. Rationals are the most likely (along with Promoter and Crafter Artisans) to separate sex and love. When they do that, they may have little trouble justifying an affair. Inventors sometimes act like Artisans, going for the adrenaline high of conquest.

I've known INTJ players, and ENTPs loyal to the bone. Theoretically NTs should think through the long range implications, which might account for why they don't want unnecessary hassle with someone that isn't worth it. Still, generalizations can be rather faulty when faced with empirical data.

 

[Aleph-One]

Some scientific studies have been done which undermine most of Kiersey's claims about the sexual and romantic habits and pairings based on the MBTI, so I don't doubt that you have.

 

[Ardea]

my sistah!!

 

[jenocyde]

Yeah, and things like that aren't written in stone. Behaviors are learned.
These are just tendencies.

 

[Aleph-One]

The MBTI is one of two unscientific vices I allow myself. The other one is loading up on vitamins when I get sick, even though the studies show it does absolutely nothing.

 

[Risen]

Sex without love is like cake without icing. Why the hell would you take it!?

 

[Aleph-One]

I'd liken sex without some emotional attachment to icing without the cake, actually.

 

[Ardea]

^ Nice.

 

[jenocyde]

^^also agree, aleph...

Sex without love is like cake without icing. Why the hell would you take it!?

It's funny that you say that, but I actually scrape the icing off!! It's nasty.

For me, Risen, I need to respect someone's mind before I share my body. I need to be impressed, challenged, and in a way, "look up to" that person. But if someone can't hold my mental interest, it ain't happening. During the physical act, my brain is constantly questioning and testing, finding limits and exploring. I'm not feeling love. But I am feeling curiosity and gaining knowledge, which is the hottest, most erotic feeling to me.

 

[Risen]

I'd liken sex without some emotional attachment to icing without the cake, actually.

Well, cake is good and sweet on its own, but without icing, it's dull and dry to the mouth. It lacks the full flavor and substance of true cake, provided by the small yet vital addition of icing. Likewise, sex without love may be pleasurable on the most physical level, but you will never know the full pleasure of sex without the addition of love.

 

[jenocyde]

Likewise, sex without love may be pleasurable on the most physical level, but you will never know the full pleasure of sex without the addition of love.

I know that due to insecurities, some people need that level of reassurance, but it's unrealistic to say that there is a 'full pleasure' that you know of, that I am not reaching and don't experience. Silly rabbit...

 

[Risen]

I know that due to insecurities, some people need that level of reassurance, but it's unrealistic to say that there is a 'full pleasure' that you know of, that I am not reaching and don't experience. Silly rabbit...

Oh go eat your icing without the cake .

 

[Ardea]

^^also agree, aleph...



It's funny that you say that, but I actually scrape the icing off!! It's nasty.

For me, Risen, I need to respect someone's mind before I share my body. I need to be impressed, challenged, and in a way, "look up to" that person. But if someone can't hold my mental interest, it ain't happening. During the physical act, my brain is constantly questioning and testing, finding limits and exploring. I'm not feeling love. But I am feeling curiosity and gaining knowledge, which is the hottest, most erotic feeling to me.

GET OUT OF MY HEAD!


Love... can be there... but so rarely is. I don't like it. It's too raw. Too naked. Too, how Synarch put it, hermit crab outside its shell. It's deep. It hurts. And the only thing I want is for their mind to be blown away. And not even care about myself in the act.

I like it when they adore me. Call me a goddess. Say my name. Be gentle, yet amazing and confident. Then, I feel loved.

 

[Synarch]

This thread comes down to one simple thing.

Those who feel they can control their emotions need to believe you can separate tender emotions from physical intimacy. Tenderness means capable of being hurt. XNTP's are the most afraid of being hurt, so I would expect them to support this conceit the most vociferously.

Control is an illusion. We don't even know ourselves that well, I imagine.

 

[Risen]

And I should clarify that I don't mean love in terms of some ultimate bond, but love as in caring about the person you are mating with on some deeper level, as opposed to a one night stand with someone you just met. We have love for friends, then we have romantic love that can be expressed sexually.

Sex without any sort of bonds or attachments is, again, pointless in my mind. God gave me a right hand for that .

This thread comes down to one simple thing.

Those who feel they can control their emotions need to believe you can separate tender emotions from physical intimacy. Tenderness means capable of being hurt. XNTP's are the most afraid of being hurt, so I would expect them to support this conceit the most vociferously.

Control is an illusion. We don't even know ourselves that well, I imagine.

DEAD ON!