[Traditional Enneagram] Enneagram Random Thought Thread

[Kingu Kurimuzon]

I am known to be very open to trying new experiences and food, to the point I could almost mistype myself as a 7. That said, once I have tried something, it is very difficult for me to change my mind if I hated it. For instance, pimiento cheese grossed me out as a kid, and I would refuse to eat it for the longest time, until my wife finally convinced me to try her homemade recipe (which I did like quite a bit). Regarding drugs, I've tried most things offered to me at least once (with the exception of heroin, anything involving needles and any of that synthetic shit like bath salts)

And while I do enjoy trying new foods, I will usually stick to known favorites (especially if eating at a new restaurant). If it's a restaurant I've eaten at a lot and had good experiences with most of their dishes, then I will be more open to trying different dishes. Same with drugs, most of them that I have tried no longer interest me, except for cannabis which I use medicinally.

It should also be stated that despite liking trying new foods, my core favorite dishes are mostly about as basic as they come (cheeseburgers, caesar salads, etc).

 

[Kingu Kurimuzon]

I do feel like I tend to carry a big store of nervous energy, and in theory it means I should be a more active person by default, but I have trouble willing myself to expend this energy. The thought of doing that gives me a great deal of anxiety. What if I do that but then I don't have enough energy left to devote to things I want to do, or to devote to potential crises?

It's also my experience that said energy burns up fast. So for example, I can get excited and enthusiastic about something like a trip to a nature preserve to look at flora and fauna, thinking to myself "alright, I'm excited to spend a day doing this", but once I've been there a little while, it doesn't take long for me to burn out and be ready to be home reading a book or zoning out with a video game. I've never been able to be one of these people who can spend an entire day doing a bunch of activities. I really wish I could be one of those people. Coffee helps, but even then, it's more a mental energy expenditure than a physical energy expenditure that tends to lead to my burnouts.

 

[Earl Grey]

Loool I've been eating the same exact thing for lunch at school for over four years...

Wow, I physically cannot do this. I once had sausages and nuggets (at school) for two weeks straight then I didn't want to see or touch it anymore for over a decade.

 

[RadicalDoubt]

Wow, I physically cannot do this. I once had sausages and nuggets (at school) for two weeks straight then I didn't want to see or touch it anymore for over a decade.

I tend to go back and forth between this mindset and "whatever is most simple." I brought peanut butter and jelly to school every single day for probably around 4 years because I could just scarf it down without actually paying attention to the flavor (and of course, when I stopped, I tended to avoid peanut butter in general for at least a year). I don't know if I'm the type that must try something new at a restaurant every time, but I am the type of person who typically tries to not visit the same restaurant twice and will proceed to order whatever thing on the menu is most foreign to me or seems the most obnoxious (within range of price and my allergies of course) almost every chance I get.

 

[Saturnal Snowqueen]

I tend to go back and forth between this mindset and "whatever is most simple." I brought peanut butter and jelly to school every single day for probably around 4 years because I could just scarf it down without actually paying attention to the flavor (and of course, when I stopped, I tended to avoid peanut butter in general for at least a year). I don't know if I'm the type that must try something new at a restaurant every time, but I am the type of person who typically tries to not visit the same restaurant twice and will proceed to order whatever thing on the menu is most foreign to me or seems the most obnoxious (within range of price and my allergies of course) almost every chance I get.

Not allergic to peanuts eh??

I'm doing another very typically 79 stem thing-lately I've been trying the Dunkin "secret menu". It's kinda a bs name given that they make the ability to put flavor shots in things obvious, but it's a way for me to try something I didn't think of. I tried a mint cocoa with a coconut shot in it cause it told me that it'd taste like a peppermint patty(and it did). Also tried a vanilla bean coolata with a hazelnut shot, which was supposed to taste like cake and it did. I kinda quietly judge people that order the same thing over and over, cause it's like you're spending your money to get the same old thing? Or if you're on break having lunch, you could be making the most of your time by eating something new but you're not. But eh, it's not my life.

 

[Earl Grey]

I tend to go back and forth between this mindset and "whatever is most simple." I brought peanut butter and jelly to school every single day for probably around 4 years because I could just scarf it down without actually paying attention to the flavor (and of course, when I stopped, I tended to avoid peanut butter in general for at least a year). I don't know if I'm the type that must try something new at a restaurant every time, but I am the type of person who typically tries to not visit the same restaurant twice and will proceed to order whatever thing on the menu is most foreign to me or seems the most obnoxious (within range of price and my allergies of course) almost every chance I get.

What little Se I have I do use when eating, I do really like trying new things though I do have a high enough ick factor (pig feet soup, anyone?) that I wouldn't call myself a foodie. I think the most interesting experience is not just trying a new dish, but trying one from a new country, even if it has familiar elements (eg; US chicken noodle soup VS Chinese lo mein VS Japanese ramen VS Italian pasta-anything all have noodles but all taste different).

When I really end up liking something though I can visit again and again for my same favourite dishes. This is truer for stuff like coffee.

 

[Pessimistic Hippie]

I'm sure that, like with most Enneagram tests, the results for the Eclectic Energies one can be really faulty. But this is the first time my sx 4 score has been so apparent (I hadn't taken it in almost a year.) I wonder what happened.

The one thing I like about that test is that for someone who's as prone to overthinking as I am, it's pretty easy to fill out in my experience.

 

[Kingu Kurimuzon]

Interesting

 

[Pessimistic Hippie]

I didn't see it before, but my 4 envy/competitiveness is very real, and I hate it.

I don't actively compete but I feel the desire to. I feel the sense of "How do these people who seem to live better than I do despite their own major personality flaws, do so? How do I get there?" But instead of allowing myself to try, I never have the energy to try to 'win' (it's because I know it's a losing battle. I'd never be fully satisfied if I have in) so I just try to suppress it. The urge is always there regardless, nagging at me like the devil on my shoulder.

I feel it mostly with my ex whom I have no feelings for anymore, just because I strongly dislike him and I resent seeing him seem to do better than me.

Regardless I know that my desire to live my own life free of envy is stronger. It's simply a matter of not quite knowing how to, mentally. Most of the time I just end up feeling stuck for this reason, so to speak.

 

[Lady_X]

interesting tritype results. last time i got 729 i wonder if this is a better fit?

View attachment 23163

 

[chickpea]

the #nota4 movement is sending me into a spiral.... maybe [MENTION=22109]Evee[/MENTION] was right and i am a 7 after all....

 

[Kingu Kurimuzon]

I think 5s make good villains. Kind of like David or Ash from the Alien universe. Their evil deeds are motivated by a desire to learn and understand. That's different from the standard emotionally driven villainous motives seen in a lot of characters. In some ways it makes them even more terrifying than say, an 8 or 3 villain. Everyone works toward acquisition, but where an 8 villain might be acquired with hurting others to attain power, or a 3 hurting others to attain status, the 5 villain would hurt people to attain pure knowledge and understanding.

I have to confess that when I've done shitty things to people, it was usually motivated by a desire to "see what happens" if I said or did X thing.

I think a 5 villain would be most similar to a 7 or 9 villain. I think 7s would have similar motivations, although I could see 9 and 5 villains sharing some similar concerns as well.

 

[Mind Maverick]

I really want to say I don't relate to Enneagram's "fear based" CP 6 bullshit...because I don't. Yet, I know that in place of fear, or when most people would feel fear, I just feel raw, visceral, passionate anger. Even in extreme situations, like when I was almost kidnapped at 14. I never felt fear, only that anger. I've always had this reaction to opposition and I've never backed down unless I believed, according to values I had, that I was supposed to...generally, with the goal of "winning them over" by killing them with kindness in mind...but it still wasn't easy or natural for me. So, I wonder, if I simply have so much passion about facing things, that I am not even normally consciously aware that there is any fear at all.

Experiencing fear is extremely rare for me, even during dreams. In almost every dream I have, nightmare or not, I'm defending others and protecting them. There's generally a common theme of gaining power in order to do it better, or starting out from 0 (and in danger myself) and gaining power to protect others, yet almost all I ever experience is anger, not fear. There is also a common theme of over-extending myself in the process of all of that. When I do experience fear in dreams, it's more so about the fear of losing against the enemy I'm standing up against and thereby losing the people I care about by failing to protect them.

Even during dreams about something such as...well, I recently dreamt that I was on a plane to go home (which to me is in EU despite being from the US, for several reasons). During the flight, my plane almost crashed. My instinct even in my subconscious was that I never thought of myself whatsoever, all of my thoughts were on how to give my 2 cats (who were with me) the best chances of survival. My fear was for them, not myself. I was actually trying to shield them with my own body.

That's how it always is. I don't relate to being fear-oriented as 6's are described to be. Yet, I'm more of a rebel, autonomy-oriented, not exerting control outwardly as 8's do. I'm more like, "you stay in your lane, I stay in mine...but if you cross the line in mine, I'm running you over or off the road."

 

[Mind Maverick]

I have to confess that when I've done shitty things to people, it was usually motivated by a desire to "see what happens" if I said or did X thing.

...that's just fucked up.

The only "motives" I've ever had in doing shitty things to people is being hurt and lashing out in anger, because the pain converted into anger. I've literally never done anything out of curiosity or something along those lines...nothing where I was just, aware of how someone would be affected but did it anyway. The only reason I would ever do anything deliberately and without a loss of self-control being involved is in some situation where like...some pedo or something harmed my kid, or someone tortured animals or treated them cruelly. I'd want to fucking rip them apart with no mercy for acts of cruelty against innocent lives like that, but at that point, they deserve every minute of it and I wouldn't feel even the slightest bit sorry regardless of what anyone thought of me for it.

I respect your honesty about it, though.

I just hope that most people don't have low enough empathy levels to do this as well, and I simply don't realize it or something.

 

[Mind Maverick]

Sometimes I gain insights into my own unconscious motives via daydreams. While I do try not to daydream, without ADHD meds being in my system at a particulartime of day or something, it's unavoidable. I get distracted by an inner world full of vivid imagery that seems to transport me into a different universe...one in which I make the rules and control the events. Something that was probably born out of being forced to watch my dad abuse my mom when I was a kid, maladaptive daydreaming.

As I shared above, almost every dream I have consists of me saving and protecting others, often to the point of pushing myself too hard, sometimes with self-destructive consequences. Recently, however, this theme somehow crept its way into a vivid daydream I was having in the shower one day. In my imagination I was with my hubby, and we opted for adoption rather than conception. I thought of what I'd look for in a child when choosing, and imagined I would look for the one that seemed the most troubled...aka, whoever seemed to have the worst behavioral problems that came from a place of love deficit.

I'll skip over some of the details and get to the point. I basically realized that I was looking for someone who was my younger self. I realized...that kid might not be like me, in reality. Maybe they wouldn't have had the same heart I had, where I just needed love and I'd have softened. I realized it was a projection which placed unfair expectations on the kid. I realized, basically, that I was trying to fix my own past inner child by helping another child in need. I realized this was wrong, and something I need to address within myself. It doesn't allow the other person to be themselves. It's a bias that prevents you from seeing the real person as they are, go through their own problems in the ways they need to, and grow in the ways that are individualistic to them.

What I have yet to understand is why exactly I was doing this. I want to learn what it means.

 

[Saturnal Snowqueen]

Being a 974 tritype as a teenager was just guys texting me, "?", without absolutely any context whatsoever.

 

[Saturnal Snowqueen]

Is it a 9 thing to constantly look lost? It doesn't matter if I am lost or not, people always have a tendency to ask if I need help with something due to the permanently confused look on my face.