My wife is trolling me to become a boss

[Ghost of the dead horse]

I can barely earn some cash a month. Now to be a boss of some group? I think my wife is trolling it. I'd wish her to be my finest analyst but I doubt it. Some evaluations show I'm all the boss but most not. I wish it, but I don't feel it. Then I do some analysis and find out well, I match many of the expectations for such role, and moreover, many of the current bosses fail those tests miserabely. I Boss around pretty much but I still it's nothing. Now it's my choice if I should believe all this hype or not (my best friend is offering job as chief tech lead), second best friend tells I'm the boss etc, how do I believe it's for real and not some crazy hype. I failed badly the last time I was a boss. I did ok the last 2 times before that. What should I believe?

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Oh and before you think chief tech lead is something, I tell you it probably isn't. I don't know where that company is headed at.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Ok the problem is twofold. First of all, I don't have the confidence to seek a managerial position right now. I don't know what I should learn to qualify. This is the bigger problem.

The second problem - which is solved, I won't take that job - is that the job is conditional upon success of the product. I should work for free as a partner to make the product successfull in order to get the paying job.

In any case, that leaves the problem one, not having confidence. It's more of a belief I'll perform badly than an actual low self-esteem issue. I'd want more qualifications. I'd need understanding of the tools and methods of the job I'd be managing. Such understanding seems hard to come by. Sometimes I've had such understanding by accident but I got no sure way to create it when needed.

 

[geedoenfj]

I won't talk about you and your wife, but I will make it brief: know your potentials and work according to them, do what you love and feel most comfortable doing .. don't live up to others expectations or try to fit to others ideas about success..

 

[Kingu Kurimuzon]

Is she encouraging you to meet your potential or being a gold digger?

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

She's generous as opposed to greedy, giving as opposed to a gold digger. She believes but she's believing too much of my marketing material I think. I can be pretty convincing even though I had practically next to nothing real.

 

[Kierva]

Eh, you'll learn on the job.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

She's generous as opposed to greedy, giving as opposed to a gold digger. She believes but she's believing too much of my marketing material I think. I can be pretty convincing even though I had practically next to nothing real.

Based on the thread title and your admission of low self confidence + this post

What do you want out of this thread? Be honest.

Do you want answers? Advice? What?

 

[1487610420]

Change wife

 

[Luke O]

Look into people management resources. There's a manager inside everyone.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Based on the thread title and your admission of low self confidence + this post

What do you want out of this thread? Be honest.

Do you want answers? Advice? What?

I'm trying to approach a subject the best I can. Haven't figured out the solution or some of the basics.

Ideally, I'd like to be coached to further my career in administration, preferably with a magic trick or a saying, like "just do it" so I'd be on my way to million bucks.

So yeah, I don't have that low a self esteem I wouldn't dream of becoming a boss again. I'd just like it with less humiliation than the last time. I'd just like it to work. Would be nice to explore my options if these people are on the right track.

Then there's the big counterargument. Once everyone I knew were selling me some multi-level marketing scheme which turned out to be a real scam. So, at least once in my life, everyone I knew were wrong about something. But, I don't know you, so maybe your analysis turns out to be the winning one.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

I'm trying to approach a subject the best I can. Haven't figured out the solution or some of the basics.

Ideally, I'd like to be coached to further my career in administration, preferably with a magic trick or a saying, like "just do it" so I'd be on my way to million bucks.

So yeah, I don't have that low a self esteem I wouldn't dream of becoming a boss again. I'd just like it with less humiliation than the last time. I'd just like it to work. Would be nice to explore my options if these people are on the right track.

Then there's the big counterargument. Once everyone I knew were selling me some multi-level marketing scheme which turned out to be a real scam. So, at least once in my life, everyone I knew were wrong about something. But, I don't know you, so maybe your analysis turns out to be the winning one.

I asked you some basic questions. What made you think I presented an analysis of you?

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

I asked you some basic questions. What made you think I presented an analysis of you?

Your (plular) future analysis

 

[PeaceBaby]

Ok the problem is twofold. First of all, I don't have the confidence to seek a managerial position right now. I don't know what I should learn to qualify. This is the bigger problem.

What would it take for you to have this confidence in yourself?

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

Your (plular) future analysis

I can only judge on what you present in the here and now. So tell me, what is my future analysis? Since you are anticipating it.

 

[Hine]

i am not trolling.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

i am not trolling.

OK then what is with this boss thing? I've generally handled expert tasks in terms of 6 months or less. Few of them has been administrative tasks. You know I have changing confidence about those jobs. So If I'm a failing boss and you push me to those jobs and I fail, you are making a failure.

Let me play a song for you.

It's a sad song and I feel sad. Well.

Really, to be a boss, one needs to know at least something about the administrative methods of the job in question. Now that's the hard part. Otherwise, I'm ready.

 

[Kingu Kurimuzon]

Do you have kids?

 

[Hine]

People listen to you and seek for your guidance. I keep constantly hearing praises about you from the mouths of men and women who know you. You have crowd control and authority in your presence. Some people even consider you a threat because of the influence you have over people.
Trust me - you are at your best when you take the lead at work.

 

[Poki]

I can barely earn some cash a month. Now to be a boss of some group? I think my wife is trolling it. I'd wish her to be my finest analyst but I doubt it. Some evaluations show I'm all the boss but most not. I wish it, but I don't feel it. Then I do some analysis and find out well, I match many of the expectations for such role, and moreover, many of the current bosses fail those tests miserabely. I Boss around pretty much but I still it's nothing. Now it's my choice if I should believe all this hype or not (my best friend is offering job as chief tech lead), second best friend tells I'm the boss etc, how do I believe it's for real and not some crazy hype. I failed badly the last time I was a boss. I did ok the last 2 times before that. What should I believe?

What do co-workers say? I am currently the tech-lead, but we actually have another team mate myself and others on the team we would deem as a better boss/manager. He is a people person, I am a technical person. He stays on top of people, I stay on top of the technical aspects. Tech Lead and Boss are 2 different roles in my opinion.