[Traditional Enneagram] What's so hard about being your type?

[Dyslexxie]

As a 3, I would say I'm incredibly dismissive to a lot of people and don't really 'care' in general. I don't do things just because it's a good thing to do, I do things because they add value.

 

[á´…eparted]

^ Strangely, I don't relate to this at all. You must experience much more dissociation with your e1 values than I do.

Really? Hunh, I thought we all did. Having my code not be congruent to objective right and wrong is a bitch.

It's like: "clean your room" "but I don't want to, it is ok" " no it is not it is a mess and people are coming over" "no I can't" "yes you can and you HAVE to. If you don't I will make you stressed guilty and sap enjoyment from you" "LALALALA I can't hear you!" "Sucks for you bitch *gives bad feelings that can not be removed*". Well, for a crude analogy anyway.

 

[EJCC]

Really? Hunh, I thought we all did. Having my code not be congruent to objective right and wrong is a bitch.

It's like: "clean your room" "but I don't want to, it is ok" " no it is not it is a mess and people are coming over" "no I can't" "yes you can and you HAVE to. If you don't I will make you stressed guilty and sap enjoyment from you" "LALALALA I can't hear you!" "Sucks for you bitch *gives bad feelings that can not be removed*". Well, for a crude analogy anyway.

Yeah, I guess I experience that. But I don't see that as conflicting values, so much as I see it as me being lazy and needing to not be lazy.

So maybe that's the dissociation vs. association thing again. You're more separate from the internal football coach than I am. (There needs to be a better name for that guy. Marc Maron calls that "the rage monster". But "overactive superego" might be the most accurate, if not the most catchy, term.)

 

[EcK]

nothing? I think complaining is rather easy.

 

[Amargith]

Yeah, I guess I experience that. But I don't see that as conflicting values, so much as I see it as me being lazy and needing to not be lazy.

So maybe that's the dissociation vs. association thing again. You're more separate from the internal football coach than I am. (There needs to be a better name for that guy. Marc Maron calls that "the rage monster". But "overactive superego" might be the most accurate, if not the most catchy, term.)

Professionals call that the 'Inner Judge'

It's basically your superego asserting itself over your ego and especially over your id. If it becomes too overbearing, it can really make your life miserable and leave your Id absolutely uncatered to which leads (for me at least) to feelings of rebellion, resentment and even to self-sabotage. Meanwhile the ego just feels a bunch of shame for not living up to the superego's expectations *all the time*. Sometimes that Judge just needs to get kicked to take a hike or reprogrammed to actually be a 'loving parent' instead of a fucking bully.

The 1's tendency to identify with the authority figure, and 'submit' as such (if you look at enneagram descriptions of the 8 raging against that and grabbing power instead, the 9 avoiding stuff like that, the 1 is the one that will instead surrender and become the 'perfect child' or die trying, as such) puts them actually at extreme risk of being bullied inside their head if their past gave rise to an extremely critical Inner Judge that sees everything black and white and isn't grounded in reality in the least bit, I'd say.

 

[HongDou]

As a 3, I would say I'm incredibly dismissive to a lot of people and don't really 'care' in general. I don't do things just because it's a good thing to do, I do things because they add value.

Whattttt when did you switch from 7 to 3??

 

[magpie]

nothing? I think complaining is rather easy.

Hmmmm, can't admit to having problems.

 

[Dyslexxie]

Whattttt when did you switch from 7 to 3??

Idk, I relate more to 3. I'm pretty ambitious. I'm not 100% sure of my enneagram though. I just barely figured out my type now lol

 

[á´…eparted]

Yeah, I guess I experience that. But I don't see that as conflicting values, so much as I see it as me being lazy and needing to not be lazy.

So maybe that's the dissociation vs. association thing again. You're more separate from the internal football coach than I am. (There needs to be a better name for that guy. Marc Maron calls that "the rage monster". But "overactive superego" might be the most accurate, if not the most catchy, term.)

The inner critic thing is true for me, but also weird. A lot of 1's seem to describe it as scolding or yelling. I never experience it like that. It's actually like Data from startreck. Cold, unfeeling, but unwaivered by anything but logic. Instead of screaming "THIS IS WRONG", it just goes "it's wrong. it's wrong." over and over and over and it gets really really freaking annoying and wears you out. It's "quiet" in a strange way, but persistent as fuck. It's not even really based in words, but more concepts and impressions, and has access to all my emotional buttons.

I think this could be due to the difference between inferior Fi and Ti.

 

[EcK]

Hmmmm, can't admit to having problems.

I'm not that self indulgent

 

[EJCC]

nothing? I think complaining is rather easy.

If it's so easy, why are you having such a difficult time with it?

The inner critic thing is true for me, but also weird. A lot of 1's seem to describe it as scolding or yelling. I never experience it like that. It's actually like Data from startreck. Cold, unfeeling, but unwaivered by anything but logic. Instead of screaming "THIS IS WRONG", it just goes "it's wrong. it's wrong." over and over and over and it gets really really freaking annoying and wears you out. It's "quiet" in a strange way, but persistent as fuck. It's not even really based in words, but more concepts and impressions, and has access to all my emotional buttons.

I think this could be due to the difference between inferior Fi and Ti.

Yeah, that's what that sounds like. Interesting...

 

[EcK]

If it's so easy, why are you having such a difficult time with it?

I think you're confusing not being interested in it and having difficulty in it

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

CP6.

Before I found out I was a CP6, I always felt like I was internally screaming with energy, frustration, annoyance...never knowing where to put it. Dealing with the dichotomy of never caring *truly* but feeling forced with a churning drive to not stop moving at the risk of becoming ordinary, lazy, complacent.

Ennegram has been crucial to me chilling the f*ck out. Learning what and how to tap into my 9 fix. Realizing self-sabotage and reaction.

I'm not a shark that needs to keep moving to not drown...I just need to face the waves and there will always be water to move through my gills.

 

[Tilt]

As a 3, I would say I'm incredibly dismissive to a lot of people and don't really 'care' in general. I don't do things just because it's a good thing to do, I do things because they add value.

I relate to this too. For me, I do somewhat care about people but will set aside personal feelings to get what I need w/o screwing them over.

 

[hjgbujhghg]

As a 4:

The self-esteem issues due to the perfectionistic streak of trying to live up to your own fantasy and expectations and the shame that comes from failing to do so...it's crippling - to the point of lashing out to others or, for me, taking it out on your own body in some way, until you figure that out.

This! Exactly this! Thanks for posting it

 

[GIjade]

For 7...



the fact that life can actually sometimes feel like this^^^ but we're too damn escapist to seriously acknowledge it

Escapist - self preservation.

 

[LavenderSoda]

People think ISTJs are supposed to be this organized and book smart push over. I'm not. I am disorganized and I'm not very book smart. I don't like getting involved at all with conflict. I like to debate and all of that good stuff. I am super creative too. You would think I was an ISFP or INFP but I am not one at all. I am ISTJ; however I am not 16 personalities ISTJ. - A grungy aesthetic - obsessed emotional thinker.

 

[grey_beard]

As a 4:

The self-esteem issues due to the perfectionistic streak of trying to live up to your own fantasy and expectations and the shame that comes from failing to do so...it's crippling - to the point of lashing out to others or, for me, taking it out on your own body in some way, until you figure that out.

You have an NT as a significant other, what more do you want?

 

[grey_beard]

As a 5w4 --
being so obsessed with thinking or with gathering information, that all else passes me by.
Mistakenly acting like once I have read about an issue, that it is the same as having come up with and applying a *solution*.

 

[Evo]

Over thinking, under relaxing

Which leads to other things that I miss out on...sensations, emotions, understanding (ironically)

Also self righteous anger