B
brainheart
Guest
I wonder the same thing. The description for type four overall sounds slightly better to me, and it's the same with the levels. But I don't identify at all with the instinctual variants for type four. Maybe something's missing, maybe we're not fulling understanding this, or maybe we're we're just right on the border of 4 and 5. If we were, what would we call ourselves? e4½?![]()
I know, it's goofy. I did what you did in your what's my type thread and read all the enneagram blogspot stuff. The instinctual variant descriptions I related to the most were sx 5, 7, 2, 4 and sp 9. I was surprised, actually, how much I related to aspects of the 2, which got me thinking maybe I'm a 5w4 with a 5-9-2 tritype, I dunno. I'm more confused than ever.
I can say this-
Some descriptions of four I relate to much, some I don't relate to at all.
For another viewpoint, my husband says it's ' really weird' when I'm pms'ing because otherwise I am never bitchy. He also says that over all I am the opposite of our cat; in other words, I'm not emotionally needy. My husband is way more emotionally needy and demonstrative than I am, by the way. I am very reserved, contained, self-sufficient, private, non verbal for the most part, awkward with intimacy, but also kind and empathetic. When I meet someone with whom I feel a connection I become very open and enthusiastic, fun and flirty. If I fear that person isn't interested in being a part of my life, I can get manipulative and coy and fearful. If I lose interest I feel a sense of relief because now I can go back to being my usual self. I married my husband because we have fun and he loves me and I feel comfortable with him, I never got into the crazy obsessive insecure thing with him. It was easy.
Some negatives to that are I don't fully feel like I share myself with him, I keep a lot inside because he doesn't get a lot of what I think, it's too dark and cerebral and odd. This creates a distance which sometimes is fine with me, sometimes makes me feel alone and detached.
Sorry, that was a lot of blabbing.
Leaning toward sx 5 or sx 9, but-dare I say- fives seem too geeky and thinking center and nines seem too happy and absent, while fours seem too brooding and temperamental... Blah