the opening was meant as a joke...
As for the whole bit about cluelessness its more of a I can never really know how others feel towards me. As a result, of a few(two) bad experiences (overestimations) I tend to be extremely careful. which also has downs to it.
When it comes to people I like romantically, I question my ability to make these sorts of judgements even more (because everyone's head gets a little loopy). So I do nothing until I'm absolutely sure... by which time I lose opportunity.
And of course, I would absolutely hate for things to go sour... in any relationship really...
I wonder how common that is for your type? It sounds like it might be a combo of being "NP" and also just a question of experience. The whole 'taking forever to decide' is a valid issue but I think experience goes a long way. I think recognizing this is an issue and wanting to resolve it is already taking a big step (no really, you can check the forum to see many examples who don't care of even take pride in taking forever to decide or flip-flopping back and forth when it comes to relationships)
you're probably right. Most of my friends that I've explained this insecurity to seem pretty suprised initially (they say they doubt the possibility since its not consistent with my general attitutes and such), but at some level I know they at least suspect it...
In general ENTPs SEEM very confident, but from speaking with friends and observation, there's always insecurities and achille's heels.
by the way, no I'm not a guy. I wish... I've had 4 people (friendly enough to admit it) admit they would date me if I was male. I also hate girl world.
I feel like I've said too much
Now I will be forced to
Hahaha! Sorry, I dodged a bullet by not assuming you were a dude...it's so hard to tell with ENTPs online!
I think that explains more.
I think ENTP males, particularly early 20s and younger, are more likely to be cocky in general and over-estimate their popularity or 'skill' with the ladies specifically. Which isn't the same as the 'romantic skills' I think you were referring to but they overlap.
For an ENTP female, I'm guessing some of your feelings of cluelessness come because you have different expectations put on you regarding "romance" or dating because of your gender?
As for feeling like you can't correctly gauge people's interest in you, that might just be hyperactive Ne and your other latent cognitive functions catching up.
Too much Ne with no weak and unreliable filters (Ti, Fi, learned experience, learning body language, social sense, etc.) can be a vacuum suck of your environment. And I can very easily see how Ne doms, particularly when young, can be be oblivious to other people's signals and reactions to them. Particularly as a thinker if you aren't naturally inclined to care as much.
BTW...what's your age range? I kinda assumed from your OP you were college aged so I was tailoring my response to you based on that...
I think though having had a few bad experiences is a blessing in disguise. Learning through experience is a pretty good model. If you recognize in retrospect what went wrong, you can be more mindful of it in the future. And particularly if you ask friends who observed what happened for their opinions.
Luckily you got that tert Fe which will help you smooth the way in social situations and probably help you out with your feelings of cluelessness.
Also, are you sure you are truly regretful about those past situations because you really like the person? Or because you 'missed out' on something? I think also an 'NP' trait is feeling bad about 'missed opportunities' just because it is a missed opportunity. The past is just so...final.