[ESFJ] Are All ESFJs Like This?

[miss fortune]

why wouldn't you want to be spanked? some people like that sort of thing!

 

[Gabe]

Is it too late to talk about the frequency of judgement manipulation amongst ESFJs?

Judgement manipulation is when a person wants you to do something, and speaks a negative judgement about you if you don't agree.

Well, just don't call it 'manipulation' right from the start. I mean, what do you expect people to do, not make a judgement? Now, no offense, but as much as you've said "Esfjs do bla bla bla" I don't even have a good reason to take for granted that the 'esfjs' you talk about are even ESFJs!
Now, I also think anyone would have a right to get grumpy if you tried to make them logically justify every thought they ever had. Because it's just as controlling!
Demanding that other people play your kind of football isn't fair no matter which side of this you come from.

 

[MacGuffin]

You know, for the life of me, I cannot imagine why INTP-ness is so often correlated with Asperger's Syndrome... I can see why INTP's get so annoyed about it

It's INTPs not INTP's!

And Aspies are more for INTJs.

 

[proteanmix]

I was spanked? I didn't realize.

Of course not, dear.

 

[Zergling]

I'm beginning to think ImNotToPopular is a possible troll, and has definitely turned into an internet persona, over the course of this thread. There isn't really an attempt to argue anything, or say anything on the forum outside this thread, and most of the posts seem more oriented toward creating an impressions, and separating out people based on group.

 

[Wandering]

Wandering, I'll hold him down for you.

Guffie Guffie Guffie, come here get your nuggie nuggie nuggie!!

 

[Totenkindly]

It's INTPs not INTP's!

Consistency, boy! Consistency!

 

[Ivy]

*observes descent of thread*

Well, nobody can say I didn't try. Positive discipline doesn't always work but it's always worth a try.

 

[FFF]

I'm beginning to think ImNotToPopular is a possible troll, and has definitely turned into an internet persona, over the course of this thread. There isn't really an attempt to argue anything, or say anything on the forum outside this thread, and most of the posts seem more oriented toward creating an impressions, and separating out people based on group.

A troll? No, I'm just a random, P-type mess with no real overall goals or intentions. I tend to take a silly, humorous approach to things, but that doesn't make me a troll.

 

[FFF]

why wouldn't you want to be spanked? some people like that sort of thing!

Hey now, let's keep this site PG or whatever the equivilent new movie rating level is.

 

[alcea rosea]

Peace people, peace!

 

[miss fortune]

PG? I was just making a bit of light fun! damn you serious types!

 

[FFF]

I'm beginning to think ImNotToPopular is a possible troll, and has definitely turned into an internet persona, over the course of this thread. There isn't really an attempt to argue anything, or say anything on the forum outside this thread, and most of the posts seem more oriented toward creating an impressions, and separating out people based on group.

Even if that's so (not the troll part), you don't know how much of a reader I am. I'm much more of a reader here than a poster.

 

[FFF]

Well, just don't call it 'manipulation' right from the start. I mean, what do you expect people to do, not make a judgement? Now, no offense, but as much as you've said "Esfjs do bla bla bla" I don't even have a good reason to take for granted that the 'esfjs' you talk about are even ESFJs!
Now, I also think anyone would have a right to get grumpy if you tried to make them logically justify every thought they ever had. Because it's just as controlling!
Demanding that other people play your kind of football isn't fair no matter which side of this you come from.

Well the girl I work with says so much that it's easy to figure out her type. She talks and talks and will go up to anyone and talk and talk. She never talks about anything except simple everyday stuff. I'm quite familiar with ES_P types and she doesn't bare a resemblance to them. She also said stuff to confirm that she's J like how she always keeps up with keeping her house clean and how she has a lot of traditional views (this would suggest SJ). From there you just need to figure out if she's more power/success oriented (ESTJ) or people judgement oriented (ESFJ).

I mean there's this really quiet girl that seems like she could be ISTJ, but I admit, that's just guess work. I have no idea if it's right because I can barely get her to say anything.

 

[Gabe]

Well the girl I work with says so much that it's easy to figure out her type. She talks and talks and will go up to anyone and talk and talk. She never talks about anything except simple everyday stuff. I'm quite familiar with ES_P types and she doesn't bare a resemblance to them. She also said stuff to confirm that she's J like how she always keeps up with keeping her house clean and how she has a lot of traditional views (this would suggest SJ). From there you just need to figure out if she's more power/success oriented (ESTJ) or people judgement oriented (ESFJ).

I mean there's this really quiet girl that seems like she could be ISTJ, but I admit, that's just guess work. I have no idea if it's right because I can barely get her to say anything.

Well, I'm not convinced. I admit I probably never will be with the line of reasoning you use. By the way, I can hear the judgement in 'simple everyday stuff' when you wrote it. I can hear the judgement in it. There's nothing wrong with simple, everyday stuff.

Anyway, regardless of what type she is, I still don't feel at all like you're right and she's wrong. And I suggest you don't try to convince me that you're all in the right, because that's almost certianly not the case.

With the whole 'mean' thing, by the way, it seems like you need to practice
defending yourself instead of insulting this person in your mind, where she can't defend herself.

 

[INTJMom]

This thread is awesome.

We need more like it at INTPc.

LOL!

 

[alicia91]

She never talks about anything except simple everyday stuff

Well, perhaps she gets a vibe from YOU or others that 'indepth' conversations wouldn't be appropriate? I only talk about light-hearted crap at work too, because I don't want to SHARE so much of myself with co-workers.

I'm quite curious about your age. You strike me as young and inexperienced so therefore I will take what you say with a huge grain of salt. As you mature I'm sure you will realize that we are all unique and can't easily be put into 16 little boxes.

Ok- I admit I only read the first 8 pages.

 

[Tigerlily]

So, now I end up working with this fat ESFJ girl, and she is so annoying. She basically goes up to anyone and starts talking about simple, boring, everyday stuff like her roomate stealing her toilet paper and how she likes to eat cake.

She's always quick to come up with stupid judgements (notice the SJ) about me. She'll ask me to do stuff because she's too lazy to do it herself, and if I don't oblige, she says stuff like I'm mean. Maybe she's right when she says I'm rude, but I'm an INTP. DEAL WITH IT! If you want fluff or sensitivity, go talk to some F type.

My ENTP friend and I discussed how ESFJs have this way of trying to manipulate people with their stupid judgements, but how it doesn't work with us. Personally, when ESFJ girl says I'm mean, I just stand there thinking, "You're an idiot."

I know better than to tell her anything personal or meaningful because after two or three days, everyone in the whole damn store is gonna know about it. So pretty much I just stand there and mirror her level of interaction, by saying no more than boring everyday crap. Of course, sometimes we need to talk about work related stuff, so that works out okay.

Yesterday, she asked me for a ride home later and my automatic response was NO. Then she said something about not giving a "friend" a ride home. I almost told her, "You're not my friend. You're someone who stands in front of me and goes blah blah blah." Really, this girl doesn't know a thing about me. I haven't even mentioned a thing to her about my interest in personality theories.

I think you're going about this all wrong. She is obviously on your mind otherwise you wouldn't have wasted your time posting about her. I think you her. You say she is fat, so maybe you two could work out at the gym together a few days a week. After work perhaps? Also would I be wrong in assuming that you're Uber hot? Maybe some of your hotness will rub off on her and you two can do the humpity dumpity together. Or if that doesn't pan out you could just get another job.

Good luck and keep us posted!

 

[FFF]

Well, perhaps she gets a vibe from YOU or others that 'indepth' conversations wouldn't be appropriate? I only talk about light-hearted crap at work too, because I don't want to SHARE so much of myself with co-workers.

I'm quite curious about your age. You strike me as young and inexperienced so therefore I will take what you say with a huge grain of salt. As you mature I'm sure you will realize that we are all unique and can't easily be put into 16 little boxes.

Ok- I admit I only read the first 8 pages.

I'm not so young, but I am inexperienced due to my lack of popularity.

I have noticed she never talks about her relationship with her boyfriend. I wonder why. To me it seems that it might be a more practical relationship than deep and passionate. Her boyfriend also seems SJ, but I don't know him that well.

 

[FFF]

I think you're going about this all wrong. She is obviously on your mind otherwise you wouldn't have wasted your time posting about her. I think you her. You say she is fat, so maybe you two could work out at the gym together a few days a week. After work perhaps? Also would I be wrong in assuming that you're Uber hot? Maybe some of your hotness will rub off on her and you two can do the humpity dumpity together. Or if that doesn't pan out you could just get another job.

Good luck and keep us posted!

I her? No way. I don't find her attractive even in the slightest way.

If I were hot, I might actually be popular. Some girls have been known to say I'm cute, though.