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  1. #11
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    6w7 so/sx
    EII Ne


    Quote Originally Posted by Hard View Post
    I don't grasp it period. Honestly, how is it even a question? What do you mean "don't know how I feel around other people"? don't know? That's something that is extremely obvious to me and I just can not understand how someone wouldn't know that. It smacks me in the face hard instantly and can be a problem sometimes actually if I really despise someone. It really truly boggles my mind.

    If it is a 9 thing that would make sense, it's the lowest of the low for all the enneagram types I relate with.
    I can kind of relate with OP. For me, sometimes I have very strong feelings around others, and other times I am not sure how I feel, especially until I process it later. I often feel the latter if I interpret mixed signals from someone. For example, I went on an interview recently, and thought that my interviewer seemed somewhat disinterested in me. However, I got a call back, and when I met with him again, and his tone completely changed, and he was warm and welcoming and embracing. So now I look back and I think maybe he had been preoccupied or having a bad day. But at the time, it was so hard to read him, and because it was so hard to read him I didn't know how to feel in response. I left the interview feeling a confusing jumble of happy to have been called into an interview at all but very floaty-in-between emotionally because I had no idea how I was received. I ended up having to kind of suspend my feelings in relation to that experience because I couldn't get a solid footing and it was hard to proceed emotionally until I had a final answer.

    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    Another enneagram 9. The J/P thing is hard with them, as they tend to sound P-ish, but aren't necessarily, which will confuse them also. They also want people to give them closure, but don't necessarily create it themselves, and that also doesn't neatly seem J or P.

    It's always hard for me to grasp the "I don't know how I feel around other people" thing, and I think it's more e9 than Fi or Fe.
    Yes! My boyfriend, whose type took me ages to figure out and confirm with him, is J and e9. He is the most confusing mix of seeking closure and not necessarily creating closure. His spaces are what I would like to call an organized mess - when we moved into our apartment, he was so diligent about setting everything up and creating a place for everything and putting everything in its place. But now, he tends to be as messy or more messy than I am. But in a predictable way. And he moves quickly to decisions - he doesn't like leaving things up in the air - but he is also very avoidant of certain topics and sometimes will say things like yes I definitely want to make a decision on that but not until two years from now when I am finished with whatever. And then he adheres very strictly to that. He, too, is very sensitive to sensory processing and stimuli, and is highly controlling of his environments. But it is more of a passive form of control, with him avoiding environments he does not like and gravitating towards environments he does like, more then taking the environments he doesn't like and transforming them.

  2. #12
    failed poetry slam career chubber's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    5w4 sp/sx
    ILI Te


    Quote Originally Posted by Legion View Post
    Dominant perception, but extroverted judgement = IxxJ
    That's very true.

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