You aren't an INFP.

[Null]

*looks pointedly at self in mirror*

 

[Kullervo]

This is going to be good.

 

[JocktheMotie]

So not only are we kicking people out of the INFJ club, we're kicking them out of the INFP club too!? Jesus, the rest of us need to secure our borders

Elect me as the INTP leader and I'll MAKE INTPS GREAT AGAIN!

 

[violet_crown]

Elect me as the INTP leader and I'll MAKE INTPS GREAT AGAIN!

Jock 2016! Jock 2016! Jock 2016!

 

[/DG/]

Leading with a Perceiving function might actually make someone super disorganized as well, by the way. That's why the P/J disorganized/organized stereotype doesn't work. Also I don't think that's type-related anyways.

I'm a roll here, aren't I? *eats cinnamon roll*

Well this certainly makes me feel a lot better about not having my shit together.

In the big five, I am an unstructured type, which supposedly doesn't correlate with J types.

 

[OrangeAppled]

Hi. So, from your Experience: How to tell appart an Isfj and an INFP? Clear differences between you and your mum.
Thanks.

Requesting a wall'o'text, eh?

Outwardly, we look very different and I cannot imagine people thinking we have similar personalities. Growing up, I failed to identify with my mom much, which I think partly created my 4 sense of being different, especially in a defective way. I was criticized a LOT for not being an SF woman, basically. I was frequently compared to my INTP uncle and INFJ aunt, who are considered "odd". So that said, I think the confusion could come in how my mom sees herself, which may sound more INFP than ISFJ in many ways if she were to describe herself. However, my mom is a baby boomer and still fits a lot of stereotypical ISFJ stuff pretty well. I know some young ISFJ women and they reflect a lot of Millennial values, and I know when my mom was young she was a bit "trendy" and not "traditional". For example, she hopped on the hippy bandwagon for stuff like natural birth outside a hospital and breastfeeding, which were more novel concepts in her day and amounted to deviating from the "norms" in her childhood.

A lot of Millennial values sound like stereotypes of INFPs - the whole indie/hipster subculture, emphasis on things being "special" and "personal", the "follow your dreams" and "do what you love" mantras, greater awareness of the environment and treatment of animals, various social "progress" as new cultural values, etc.

So anyway, I am actually going to note stuff that could be misconstrued in her own self-perception, but how it actually differs from myself (and how I see INFPs).

Examples:
- Being "future oriented" is often attributed to being an N type. However, my mom is more of a planner and worries a lot about the future. She imagines worst case scenarios a lot. That could be construed as thinking about "possibilities".
- She likes new things, but needs to have an idea ahead of time of what it will be like, what to expect, and she seeks trusted sources to inform her. I am far more comfortable with the true "unknown" and seek out novelty on my own. I am less prone to consider possible risks.
- My mom can seem highly gullible and even prone to magical thinking or superstitiousness in a way that may make her feel she is whimsical or not "down to earth". She will adopt wacky beliefs in stuff, such as believing you can "think away" serious illness and especially weight loss scams. While I like to contemplate silly new agey junk like "auras", I don't believe it. I like to think about it because the absurdity amuses me...she seems to believe it, even if for a temporary time.
- She is way more concerned about, say, treatment of animals than I am. Most SFs I know are that way. I make a clear distinction between different animals and the human experience, so that I don't project human experience onto animals as much. My mom is the type to wonder "what the cat is thinking". A lot of people associate this with NFPs for some reason.
- My mom is very curious, and I think some of it is fear driven. She definitely fears the unknown, but it can manifest as curiosity that can venture into that whimsical territory again. She has noted that when younger she would drive people nuts asking questions that seemed silly, because she'd hear some snippet on the news and get carried away with what it was implying. Or she'd read some piece of fiction and wonder if it could really be. In contrast, I ask questions to myself and explore things, and I actually seem to have a greater sense of what is possible in reality, even if my sense of this SEEMS far-fetched to others. Yet, I create whimsy on demand better, knowing all the while it is whimsy, because for me it is usually a metaphor. My mom seems to be regurgitating stuff she has seen/hear somewhere and just finds it fund/cool or it makes her wonder in a slightly paranoid way.
- My mom spends a lot of time in her head imagining stuff, but a lot of it seems to be concrete. She will say when she reads a novel, for example, that she likes to picture what people lived like in a certain past era, that she likes descriptions of what things looked like, etc. Again, she imagines future stuff, but generally it is the immediate, realistic future and she tends to focus on what could go wrong. This could be construed as being "imaginative".
- She creates a lot. She is very crafty and has a good sense of aesthetics, but she mostly tweaks existing methods rather than "inventing" anything truly novel. She doesn't create original concepts or philosophies. She doesn't create or explore new perspectives that much. She doesn't seem to be expressing difficult, hard to articulate emotions. She doesn't seem concerned with exploring aspects of the human condition that are not part of her immediate reality. This is from my perspective, of course. She once told me that she would like to get into art, but needs to learn what is "good art". She seems more fascinated to learn about facts about an artist's life and methods than to feel the art itself in the moment & to viscerally determine whatever it is communicating. This is extremely different from how I and my ISFP step-dad approach art, which is closer to the latter. I find this especially odd, as she DOES seem to swim around very intimately in other sensory experience.
- She feels what other people feel pretty readily, probably more so than I do. I tend to empathize more intellectually. I may understand an emotional reaction that is totally foreign to me & that I have never had & would never have, seeing how the fundamental meaning of their emotional experience aligns is a basic human emotion I (& most people) have experienced and being able to enter their perspective without it affecting my own emotions. My mom readily grasps "typical" emotional responses in people and feels the emotions in the moment like they are her own. However, she cannot understand why someone would assign a particular value to something and have an associated emotional response to it, or they do not respond in the usual way most people respond, then she can be extremely dismissive or even judgmental.
- She has common sense in most cases; she knows "how things are done". I don't. Since I am always seeking an unexpected angle, it can make me miss the obvious at times, or I approach common tasks in a novel way simply because I didn't bother to observe how others do stuff and note it for future reference. This can add to my creativity or make me an airhead.
- She has pretty defined ideas of how things "should" be that definitely could be called ideals and she is not happy when stuff doesn't align with these. A difference is she thinks these are obvious truths about how reality should be or even IS (say, for other people), and she tends to romanticize the past as having met these ideals; whereas I tend to see my ideals as fundamental concepts of what is important or necessary to the human experience or my personal experience, but these are things which cannot ever be fully defined and are more like general themes to cultivate, not things which ever have or ever will perfectly exist.
- She is a perfectionist in a physical way - the environment needs to be orderly and her life should align with her ideals which are largely "measurable" stuff. This makes her more meticulous and consistent. I am a perfectionist in creating value concepts and how they are expressed (the means of expression has to be adequate), which means I am constantly adjusting and revising what "things mean" in my head, making my outward appearance and even goals way less steady. Sure, I'd love to have a picture perfect home, but I cannot prioritize it.
- I think she pleases people she cares for or respects because she wants to keep their support. I tend to do things out of principle in a more detached way. I use the word "principle", but it is a FEELING of what is right/good, but it doesn't well up as emotion within me. I am not saying there is no principle there for her, but she truly seems more moved emotionally. If I am moved emotionally, it is not about a personal attachment to anything/anyone, rather, its implicit belief in a value concept of mine. Subtle difference in description, but a big difference in how we appear.

Curious what other ISFJs think about that, especially with generational differences, because the young ISFJs I know make for much better pseudo-INFPs.

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

The people's INFP?

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

Dated a girl in college who tested as an INFP in Psych class, but in retrospect, seems like a clear cut ISFJ. This adds no substance to this thread, but I can see how someone can confuse them.

 

[Frosty]

To me, alot of it just comes down to consistance. Speculating below... Brainstorming I guess. Not well thought out but oh well. If its to meh, ill contribute an ISFJ and INFPs are both wonderful because we are all very unique individuals who have our own wonderfully happy qualities to share with the world. Then a heart.

Those who ARE a type just naturally are that type- it comes through in action- whatever they say carries that action with it. They show it more-whatever 'it' is. An ISFJ might talk about idealism, about broad ideals/ideas such as 'peace' 'harmony' 'togetherness'... But really... It is almost like it never leaves those very broad... Descriptions. There is less touching onto what harmony actually means-harmony as an example... To them--- no real internalization... It doesnt tend to hold up their posts- what they talk about... Instead its being held up. I think this might be even more true for ESFJs actually... ISFJs might internalize this more- find comfort in these things in a-well this probably doesnt give it enough credit--- in more of a hallmark greeting card way. A swell of happiness, maybe a storage away... But it never really is used to branch out into larger contexts.

But it is about consistancy really. Consistancy that might-because they value cooperation--- lead to stances supporting more socialistic agendas-arguing more in that way- forcefully--- but not generally needing to state that the reason for their interest- for their 'passion' is rooted in that ideal. They just combine similar themes supporting that ideal, thought processes that reach out and hope to touch what they are hoping to get at- can be obscure... Sometimes have to be obscure... But obscurity might not actually be their intention. It is just how that point, they feel, is naturally best stated. Alot of this is thought dumping so yeah i mean feel free to ignore it because I might delete it later anyways.

All of those above are vague examples... Not liking this really but yeah i never do -this in particular though...

Anyways. Sometimes it does come down to a depth vs bredth thing. And Im not saying that ISFJs arent deep-I might be one, I consider it possible for sure- its just that... The depth of their moral values is based more on... Imo... Gathering instances of that value externally... And reflecting that back outwards. They might have a deep connection to some of this... Rememberig certain things and associating them with a gathered value-and then feeling like they really want to reflect those feelings-those values... Outwards. But yeah... Its not the same process really. Fi doms I think can dive so deeply into a value... That the actual overall value can externally seem obscure and out of focus-hard to understand. So they gather similar external things to associate with that value- a long and intimate process that allows them to slide along and greater examine that value... Get a better feel for it... Until they are so tied into it that they find it nearly impossible to remove themselves from.

Needs editing but I refuse to do that so perhaps deletion. Depends on how much it gnaws at me.

 

[chickpea]

Dated a girl in college who tested as an INFP in Psych class, but in retrospect, seems like a clear cut ISFJ. This adds no substance to this thread, but I can see how someone can confuse them.

in my high school psych class they gave us some shitty mbti test and over half the class got ENFP. (I was one of them)

 

[Frosty]

in my high school psych class they gave us some shitty mbti test and over half the class got ENFP. (I was one of them)

I had to do this in college-last year. I already knew about mbti a bit... So I knew how she was asking and how she was explaining-what she was looking for was just... Well... typology is just not very well understood.

I was suprised though that actually every single letter divide- N/S I/E ect... The only one that was no where close to being even... Wasnt sensors vs intuitives... But rather Feelers vs Thinkers. Almost everyone in the class typed as a feeler...

Wonder if it is because peoples ideas of feeling and thinking are more defined than any of the other dichotomoies, and that people were just more able to cherry pick those easier and that was why there was such a uh large difference/possible bias... Or whether it was something else. Before hand... We were not given much(if any cant remember) description of the functions... Only to circle what seemed more relatable.

And really... I think that is why this problem will ALWAYs exist here. There are associations with certain functions, and people are too aware of these associations- they are too ingrained... And especially between INFP and ISFJ... This will continue to happen. These 2 types are just... Collectively valued so differently... That it would take a true INFP to crown themselves an ISFJ... And for certain reasons related to Fi... Thats never going to happen.

So yeah I guess Im saying that... It will take ALOT of rewriting in my opinion to bolster any such movement towards a lesser amount of these mistypes. A complete reworking of the descriptions- a VERY appealing reworking... Otherwise this will forever to continue to be the same discussion... Which is tbh fine with me... Its interesting.

Sorry if thats obnoxious.

 

[Kas]

Elect me as the INTP leader and I'll MAKE INTPS GREAT AGAIN!

But... we are talking about INFPs in here. I think you meant: “Elect me as the INFP leader and I'll MAKE INFPS GREAT AGAIN!”.

 

[Forever]

in my high school psych class they gave us some shitty mbti test and over half the class got ENFP. (I was one of them)

1) Are you a hoodlum or an OG?
Answer: I or E respectively
2) Do you conjure magic or play with toys?
Answer: N or S respectively
3) If the school lunch lady gives you a choice between pizza or mac n cheese, which do you choose?
Answer: T or F respectively
4) Do you do your homework like you're supposed to? (Y or N)
Answer: J or P respectively.

OG magic mac n cheese-loving homework skippers.

 

[Eluded_One]

Extreme procrastination
ADD
Unconventional outlook

Haven't met an ISFJ with any of these issues.

 

[á´…eparted]

Extreme procrastination
ADD
Unconventional outlook

Haven't met an ISFJ with any of these issues.

I have.

 

[Eluded_One]

I have.

Maybe they're INFP!

 

[Yama]

Maybe they're INFP!

Or maybe they're an ISFJ who just isn't a stereotypical ISFJ

 

[Eluded_One]

Or maybe they're an ISFJ who just isn't a stereotypical ISFJ

Maybe I'm an ISFJ!

 

[Frosty]

Im gunna cop to a maybe here.

 

[Captain_Invincible]

I'm an INFP 8.