Alright, so I realize the reason I'm not making sense is because I used a really bad example. I used an example that involved being judged by others but really what I mean about this aspect of Fi/Fe is that it really only applies to one's values.
As in, the Fe user seeks consensus with what they value (some would say by conforming to what society values (hivemind) and others would say by creating the social norms, or trying to sway others to believe the same that they do). The Fi user is able to hold to their values regardless of what society's norms are, and don't feel the need to attempt to sway others to value the same things they do (?). That doesn't mean that Fi doesn't feel the pressure or that Fe can't value anything that's outside of the norm (*gestures to myself*). From what I've discussed, this has to do with the orientation of the function (external vs internal), which puts a greater influence on aspects of it that relate to the direction it's oriented.
I shouldn't have used an example that wasn't about values; of course anyone can experience what I described and you don't even have to be Fi
or Fe valuing. The reason the example I used about my family is poor is because it doesn't have anything to do with one's values or ethical code, which is really the only thing what I'm trying to describe applies to--I misapplied it in that example. It's not my intention to invalidate anyone's experiences. I hope I'm making sense now. Sorry for the late reply, I hit my post limit and couldn't post again for many hours until it reset.
I hope I haven't offended anyone because I definitely am not trying to imply that only Fe users are affected by the bullying of others (because that's obviously bs) and I'm definitely not trying to invalidate others' experiences. I should have thought more about the example I was using before I used it because in retrospect, it doesn't work with the example I tried to use since it's not value-related.
If this still doesn't sound accurate for your experience with Fi, please let me know, because this was really the only aspect of differentiating Fe/Fi that I was ever confident about because I had discussed it with other members, but if I have the wrong idea then I'd like help in figuring out the difference.
I mean Fi can do that too. It's just that the focus in more on the emotional truth (I gues enneagram plays into this as well) as compared to Fe. Really liking/caring about someone not because it's the right thing to do but simply because you do is pretty unconditional.
Not at all trying to say Fe can't care about people. They in fact are really good at finding what the person needs and nurturing them.
EDIT: I really do think anyone is capable of this, it's just that (from my impression) Fe is oriented outwards, towards people so they do not mind sacrificing their own feelings/comfort for the sake of another. For Fi, it is oriented inwards and it really hurts/doesn't feel right to abandon who you are. So I think both can experience what it feels like to truly just accept/care about someone.
The bolded is enneagram 2 more than it is Fe. They get conflated a lot, just like 4 does with Fi. The reason most descriptions of Fe never resonate with me is because they're heavily 2 flavored and I'm not a 2, not even a 2 fix.