[NF] Tips for getting better at quick reading people

[Blackout]

Hey,

So a huge part of this curiosity on my part is that for my own psychology health & well-being, I really want to get better at avoiding types of people I am incompatible with, or will just outright clash with. It's always difficult, and hard to really know what to expect from someone, but I've gotten better at sort of spotting the signs on when to pull back.

But in general, I feel as though being able to spot or point out certain cognitive functions would really help as well, but also other things to watch out for.

And this is also because personally, it is easier to asses what the cause of conflict is, and if it is worth trying to overcome, or just move on. And yeah, I am aware of how much material are on these sites, but it's a bit overwhelming.

 

[Blackout]

Though maybe if I really don't personally feel as though I care for that person, I should not bother period? I am just used to always giving others the benefit of the doubt, and a fair chance to really know them, but often times it doesn't really always end too well, or even really gaining any benefit from knowing each other.

The problem is I just don't think care for most people I meet anymore. It's not because I don't like them, I am just pretty sure if we seem a little incompatible, it won't go past any sort of initial stages of awkwardness. So most desires to be polite, contentious, and formal feels like a waste. Maybe I should just avoid most people all together. lol

I have to avoid the Daywalkers; they do not appreciate my kind.

 

[Destiny]

How does one improve their people-reading skills? By observing people.

Remember, the unspoken is always 10 times more powerful than the spoken. The amount of knowledge one can gather about a person just from observing them is astounding. Try to read into the unspoken rather than focusing on the spoken. Never believe what people says, because people are capable of lying. And never believe a person's actions, because they might have some ulterior motives behind their actions. Instead, focus on their intentions. Why did they say that? Why did they do that? is always more important than the word or action itself.

All humans are given a spidey senses. Listen to that, it's there for a reason. When something feels "off" about someone, then most likely it's accurate. Stop doubting this feeling, and just trust it.

 

[Blackout]

How does one improve their people-reading skills? By observing people.

Remember, the unspoken is always 10 times more powerful than the spoken. The amount of knowledge one can gather about a person just from observing them is astounding. Try to read into the unspoken rather than focusing on the spoken. Never believe what people says, because people are capable of lying. And never believe a person's actions, because they might have some ulterior motives behind their actions. Instead, focus on their intentions. Why did they say that? Why did they do that? is always more important than the word or action itself.

All humans are given a spidey senses. Listen to that, it's there for a reason. When something feels "off" about someone, then most likely it's accurate. Stop doubting this feeling, and just trust it.

Do you think this is ridiculous, though? the idea of even trying to get better at this.

I mean, I know this is obviously why people make such a point to ask certain questions when they first meet someone, but I don't like the ones that are often used, and I don't think always work.

If anything, the kinds of people you want to avoid the most are the most well adept at it. But yeah, isn't it really hard to figure out someone's intentions when you don't know them well?

 

[Yama]

Hmm... I'm not sure how you can read people's functions on sight (or if this is even possible??). You can read body language and facial expressions to read a persons' emotions and to an extent their intentions, but with how diverse people are, those may not correlate to people of any certain function.

 

[Dreamer]

Do you think this is ridiculous, though? the idea of even trying to get better at this.

I mean, I know this is obviously why people make such a point to ask certain questions when they first meet someone, but I don't like the ones that are often used, and I don't think always work.

If anything, the kinds of people you want to avoid the most are the most well adept at it. But yeah, isn't it really hard to figure out someone's intentions when you don't know them well?

When you're younger, it doesn't matter so much if you put in the extra effort to getting to understand those you have bad rapport with as you can simply walk away and not deal with the added stress. That's been my go-to approach for living a life as stress free as possible for most my adolescent years since I find I pick up on the emotions of others and suck it in for me to enjoy fairly easily. However, as you get older and start having to deal with people on a regular basis through work and other places where it's just not feasible to avoid them, it's to your best advantage to learn how to not only understand those people you have difficulty with, but learn you can also work with them and get things done. Even if you decide to open your own business, you're still going to come across many different types of people.

So sure, you might as well start now, no matter your age, and start to learn how to deal with all those negative Jujy fruits out there.

 

[uumlau]

The only way is to observe people AND also get to know them. The larger your library of people, the more accurately you will spot particular types before you get to know them.

 

[Xann]

As a 4w3, you have the curse of not being able to trust the judgements of your mind's eye when it comes to sensing the truths and qualities of people which are perceptible at first, second, or even third glance in how they potentially interplay and interact with your own. For this, I recommend doing away with seeking what you are seeking here, as it will only lead you to more untruth and actually cause you to avoid listening to the quality of the judgements of your heart, which is where the true tangibility of what you seek will become apparent in your dealings with others. Rather, I would advise setting the goals of your heart to a more lofty place than where they are residing currently (i.e., the direct experience of the "other" is not the end or ultimate goal), and you will begin to acquire the taste of the qualities of others in the direct sense or unsense of how they align with your own values and inclinations based on direct observation and experience, which is the ultimate determiner of compatibility. This will also have the added bonus of rendering you immune to unconstructive criticism and scrutiny as you will be in a place of much higher creative potential and quality of personal judgement than in one in which you may be seeking and contemplating these things in others.