Thalassa
Permabanned
- Joined
- May 3, 2009
- Messages
- 25,183
- MBTI Type
- ISFP
- Enneagram
- 6w7
- Instinctual Variant
- sx
The lesson is letting go of the past and letting go of attachments.
And getting past seeing the past through rose-colored glasses.
JTG, for example, is not even the same person anymore. I remember once I thought about getting back with my ESFJ ex, about two years ago, maybe two and a half, and it was almost lulzy, I talked to him ONE TIME on the phone, and he starts talking about some completely insane incident, and I was like "omg, who is this man, did I really spend six years of my life with him?"
I know I talk about ESFJ a lot, but I've long been over him, I just spent a huge chunk of my time with him, and loved him, and learned many life lessons with him.
But all it took was pretty much one two hour phone call for me to later send an email saying, "you know what, I don't really think this is a good idea."
And talking to JTG cleared anything right up about him that was lingering. I had these "what if" sorts of thoughts, but like I talked to him a few weeks ago, and had brief contact with him today, and I was like "wow yeah I'm really glad for WHAT YOU WERE AT THE TIME I NEEDED YOU but WHO THE HELL ARE YOU NOW. WERE YOU ALWAYS THIS AND I'M JUST DIFFERENT?"
It took less than an hour to just be like pfft. I had to do it too, you know, because what happened with IxFx. I have to call him "IxFx" now, because I've currently decided he's probably an INFP if he's not an ISFJ. His Si is incredibly apparent, but I think his Si is fanciful or forced or creative rather than productive.
I think the way he did this thing with his ex was really impulsive and I've had more and more clues lately that he's impulsive, and he seems intense but understated like an Fi type. I think it's possible that the reason he initially reminded me of JTG was confronting an Fi/Si loop, where as JTG had an Si/Fi loop.
They aren't the same, though, what I saw about them, it was like something in the framework was vaguely familiar. That's the entire reason I jumped to ISTJ, until I started noticing more wishy-washy, flaky, impulsivity in him, and also him insisting that he's a feeling type, much to my surprise.
So I call him IxFx until further confirmation is available. I think he's possibly an Si heavy INFP. And it occurred to me today to be true because I realized he kind of LOOKS like Kurt Cobain, and they are the same astrological sign, and of course that's all a coincidence, and he's actually better groomed, he has shorter hair, but I wonder if it is my subconscious mind telling me something. Because I never noticed it before. It's not like I met him and thought "hey you look like Kurt Cobain." It's just a weird, eerie similarity I noticed specifically while watching a Nirvana video, I was like omgwtfbbg its Si-abusing IxFx.
Anyway, so I think he has some delusional Si, and that's what this ex-gf thing is about for him, and he'll grow past it, and it will all be fine.
But even if that fineness doesn't involve me (and shit I really was starting to like him a lot more in the past month, we seemed to be getting closer, then all of a sudden...and I don't think that's a coincidence, I think he had to deal with this ex-gf issue before he can move on, if he chooses to move on. I think it's actually NECESSARY to his emotional health, now, to deal with whatever lingering issue he has with her, even if it's just a hazy fantasy) ...what I learned is that I also need to let go of attachments.
And that I'm really ready to move forward.
Really forward. Really really.
And getting past seeing the past through rose-colored glasses.
JTG, for example, is not even the same person anymore. I remember once I thought about getting back with my ESFJ ex, about two years ago, maybe two and a half, and it was almost lulzy, I talked to him ONE TIME on the phone, and he starts talking about some completely insane incident, and I was like "omg, who is this man, did I really spend six years of my life with him?"
I know I talk about ESFJ a lot, but I've long been over him, I just spent a huge chunk of my time with him, and loved him, and learned many life lessons with him.
But all it took was pretty much one two hour phone call for me to later send an email saying, "you know what, I don't really think this is a good idea."
And talking to JTG cleared anything right up about him that was lingering. I had these "what if" sorts of thoughts, but like I talked to him a few weeks ago, and had brief contact with him today, and I was like "wow yeah I'm really glad for WHAT YOU WERE AT THE TIME I NEEDED YOU but WHO THE HELL ARE YOU NOW. WERE YOU ALWAYS THIS AND I'M JUST DIFFERENT?"
It took less than an hour to just be like pfft. I had to do it too, you know, because what happened with IxFx. I have to call him "IxFx" now, because I've currently decided he's probably an INFP if he's not an ISFJ. His Si is incredibly apparent, but I think his Si is fanciful or forced or creative rather than productive.
I think the way he did this thing with his ex was really impulsive and I've had more and more clues lately that he's impulsive, and he seems intense but understated like an Fi type. I think it's possible that the reason he initially reminded me of JTG was confronting an Fi/Si loop, where as JTG had an Si/Fi loop.
They aren't the same, though, what I saw about them, it was like something in the framework was vaguely familiar. That's the entire reason I jumped to ISTJ, until I started noticing more wishy-washy, flaky, impulsivity in him, and also him insisting that he's a feeling type, much to my surprise.
So I call him IxFx until further confirmation is available. I think he's possibly an Si heavy INFP. And it occurred to me today to be true because I realized he kind of LOOKS like Kurt Cobain, and they are the same astrological sign, and of course that's all a coincidence, and he's actually better groomed, he has shorter hair, but I wonder if it is my subconscious mind telling me something. Because I never noticed it before. It's not like I met him and thought "hey you look like Kurt Cobain." It's just a weird, eerie similarity I noticed specifically while watching a Nirvana video, I was like omgwtfbbg its Si-abusing IxFx.
Anyway, so I think he has some delusional Si, and that's what this ex-gf thing is about for him, and he'll grow past it, and it will all be fine.
But even if that fineness doesn't involve me (and shit I really was starting to like him a lot more in the past month, we seemed to be getting closer, then all of a sudden...and I don't think that's a coincidence, I think he had to deal with this ex-gf issue before he can move on, if he chooses to move on. I think it's actually NECESSARY to his emotional health, now, to deal with whatever lingering issue he has with her, even if it's just a hazy fantasy) ...what I learned is that I also need to let go of attachments.
And that I'm really ready to move forward.
Really forward. Really really.
