[INTJ] The INTJ Support Thread

[Shaula]

I'm stealing this idea from those pussy ass ENTPs.

Had a bad day? Had a good day? Share, so we can criticise you.


I won't go into the details but I made the mistake of dismissing my Ni a while back (let's call it a premonition)... I should have listened to it because it was completely right. The consequence? The destruction of a perfectly good car. I mean by the time it got to the mechanic, it was too late. The engine was kaputt. There was a time when I could have stepped in to save it but no I decided against it.

 

[Aleph-One]

I made a guy cry yesterday when I called him a "slackjawed, mouthbreathing dumbass".

I felt slightly guilty after that even though he really is a slackjawed, mouthbreathing dumbass. Is there a way I can amputate my Fi? It seems to second guess my more effective functions.

 

[Misty_Mountain_Rose]

Is there a way I can amputate my Fi? It seems to second guess my more effective functions.

*snicker*

Yesterday my good friend and co-worker came into my office, sat tensely down into my office chair across from me and said 'Ok, I'm going to be the bigger person. I forgive you. I'm over it.'

My eyebrows moved into their 'what the hell are you talking about' position and I started to laugh because I thought she was joking.

Turns out she had been mad at me for two days and I didn't know it.

 

[DigitalMethod]

Nice thread idea. I like the INTJs on here, I relate easily.

 

[01011010]

*snicker*

Yesterday my good friend and co-worker came into my office, sat tensely down into my office chair across from me and said 'Ok, I'm going to be the bigger person. I forgive you. I'm over it.'

My eyebrows moved into their 'what the hell are you talking about' position and I started to laugh because I thought she was joking.

Turns out she had been mad at me for two days and I didn't know it.

I also laugh at supposedly inappropriate times. People that become newly acquainted with me, will often ask why I laughed at this or that. Usually has to do with something serious, and their feelings or situations. I think they perceive me as making fun of them, but that's the farthest thing from my mind. I just seem to find humor in things that aren't purposefully funny.

Ah, well.

 

[Haphazard]

I am unable to control my laughter.

Usually I just have to shrug it off as laughing at something I just got that was told to me yesterday. So I pretend my life is a never-ending Swiss moment.

 

[Misty_Mountain_Rose]

^^^ :nod:

 

[ceecee]

I just seem to find humor in things that aren't purposefully funny.

 

[DigitalMethod]

 

[DigitalMethod]

Alright, help me with something.

To me, when people yell, it equates in my mind to them being angry. Them expressing emotions (aggressive, frustrated, etc).

But to my dad (ENTP) when people yell at him it equates to in his mind that they are criticizing him. More importantly, it equates to in his mind that they are not showing respect, they are looking down at him. And he's so immature he just cannot have that happen, so he gets really angry when people yell at him.

Why are people like that?
I guess I can understand their perspective but I seriously don't understand why it is that way for them.

 

[Aleph-One]

*snicker*

Yesterday my good friend and co-worker came into my office, sat tensely down into my office chair across from me and said 'Ok, I'm going to be the bigger person. I forgive you. I'm over it.'

My eyebrows moved into their 'what the hell are you talking about' position and I started to laugh because I thought she was joking.

Turns out she had been mad at me for two days and I didn't know it.

You know, in that situation, I would have become angry, even if I didn't have reason to become angry before. I have no patience at all for that kind of sanctimony. Especially since most people really mean "fuck you" when they say "I forgive you." That's a heaping helping of sanctimony with a side dish of insincerity.

 

[everlastingbutter]

Alright, help me with something.

To me, when people yell, it equates in my mind to them being angry. Them expressing emotions (aggressive, frustrated, etc).

But to my dad (ENTP) when people yell at him it equates to in his mind that they are criticizing him. More importantly, it equates to in his mind that they are not showing respect, they are looking down at him. And he's so immature he just cannot have that happen, so he gets really angry when people yell at him.

Why are people like that?
I guess I can understand their perspective but I seriously don't understand why it is that way for them.

I don't think that your dad’s perspective is all that far off from your own actually and I do relate to him. When people are yelling they are expressing emotion, but they are often doing it in a very non-productive and selfish manner. Aside from the person yelling, I would like to know who benefits in such an interaction/form of communication. Yelling tends to either makes someone cower (your father) or get fired up (you?), regardless hairs tend to stand on end. Both of these reactions are typically not conducive to people resolving their shared issues/problems and instead make each person jump back over their own side of the fence in order to get in defense position (mud slinging, snow balls, dog turds- people will fight to the death for their own side when cornered like this). Yelling can easily be perceived (especially by a Ti I would think), as something that is meant to degrade or belittle because it is someone who is not interested in your opinions (otherwise they wouldn't have backed you into this corner!); it is someone saying that they are not willing to demonstrate the patience to speak in a non-threatening manner, which truly is what yelling is. That is the function of yelling; you want people to know that you are PISSED. And especially when the yelling comes from someone that is personally close, this form of communication to someone who does have a Ti function makes them see it as “Why me?! What did I (bold, italicized, etc) do?” even though their role in the matter may not be the most significant component; nonetheless, it is how they have rationalized the interaction. When someone is able to experience emotion but control the threatening tone that could accompany it, it demonstrates respect for the other person’s feelings; it shows patience & consideration.

Also, I don't think it’s immature to expect others to treat you with respect, especially not as an adult involved in adult relationships. Your father seems to want a little empathy (whether his feelings are fair, just, etc or not is something that you two could calmly, quietly discuss)