The idea of "not doing enough"

[Blackout]

I just don't get this--

What supposedly is the "normal" amount of things in a good time period (like a month to a few weeks) are most people supposed to accomplish or get done? that's one thing I've always thought was peculiar and strange is that...people are always telling me I don't "do enough" or even that I don't do "anything" (huge exaggeration) but like..I don't know, have you ever noticed this? I don;t get then, what it is your supposed to be doing? I hate small talk and just talking about random things that I do. I think most people act like their livers are movies or TV shows and they go out and do random "shenanigans" happen to them, but really in actuality it's always the same things over and over again. Mostly they just get drunk and do stupid things, and somebody gets into an accident or gets hurt often too or something bad happens. They're basically glorifying bad decisions. I don't get it : (

I think it's also kind of "trail and error" where as, instead of thinking too much, you can just "do" random things and hope that some of them maybe work and you get angry, whilst many of them don't and it's "doing things" and you're an "interesting regular person" and you are being "productive" but when I listen to most people talk about their stories it's like "Oh my god, you're just doing really dumb things for no nonsensical reason, and then you get mad at me because I'm weird and I supposedly lazy and don't "DO NOTHIN'")

I have never thought that real life is all that interesting to be honest.

But the majority of people I come across berate me for this, and most social norms make no sense to me. I think the only time that most people seriously start to come around to consciously questioning their life and reality is when they go through some kind of a mid-life crisis or go through a major life threatening experience.

 

[á´…eparted]

I experience the opposite. I never feel like I am doing enough, but people will tell me I am doing too much/enough.

It's hard to perceive yourself in this arena. If a lot of people are telling you something, there is probably some truth to it, as I have found with myself.

 

[Blackout]

I experience the opposite. I never feel like I am doing enough, but people will tell me I am doing too much/enough.

It's hard to perceive yourself in this arena. If a lot of people are telling you something, there is probably some truth to it, as I have found with myself.

Well how do you define "doing" yourself, and is the concept or idea of "doing" not "doing" enough really valid or true? I have thought this true, but when I really think about it, I spend ll my time pretty well and I don't understand why so many people say this, it's a strange common place thing that many people seem to have or do.

It's really like saying you're not conforming or adjusting and noticing social norms enough and you're bad for doing so, or you are not succeeding enough as well.

I think as well, the culture bias/norms are towards extroverted sensing? you're supposed to act and be like an extroverted sensor...? I've noticed the whole rugged individualist thing in the West too specifically, and 'outdoorsy' and being into survivalist activities or something lol.

It's not just type related like everyone says though, because I have taken the MBTI in groups before and even IN's act or do the same thing.


EAGLES, BEAVERS, BARRACUDA'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ASSEMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Litsnob]

How much you do is nobody's business unless they are paying you and you aren't doing what they hired you to do. It's true that there is judgement in our culture and I usually find it to be that we value and admire the really busy people who claim to or appear to be doing so much. I am a person who likes to get a lot done, although I am also an introvert so I will get things done quietly, privately and how much I got done won't always be obvious. I am also someone living with a chronic illness that leaves me exhausted and seriously hampers how much I can get done. I have had to adjust to that and learn not to beat myself up over it. That takes practice.

 

[Litsnob]

Well how do you define "doing" yourself, and is the concept or idea of "doing" not "doing" enough really valid or true? I have thought this true, but when I really think about it, I spend ll my time pretty well and I don't understand why so many people say this, it's a strange common place thing that many people seem to have or do.

It's really like saying you're not conforming or adjusting and noticing social norms enough and you're bad for doing so, or you are not succeeding enough as well.

I think as well, the culture bias/norms are towards extroverted sensing? you're supposed to act and be like an extroverted sensor...? I've noticed the whole rugged individualist thing in the West too specifically, and 'outdoorsy' and being into survivalist activities or something lol.

It's not just type related like everyone says though, because I have taken the MBTI in groups before and even IN's act or do the same thing.


EAGLES, BEAVERS, BARRACUDA'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ASSEMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think I understand what you are saying and the rugged outdoorsy thing extends to sporty as well. We live in an ableist society and I have also noticed that there is a great deal of value placed on travel even though travel is expensive, sometimes inappropriate (privileged people tramping around as tourists in areas of poverty or in ecologically sensitive areas) and it is less available to the disabled and ill. And yet there is the idea that you are a better person if you have travelled. You just have to learn to recognise bullshit when you see and hear it.

If you want a mantra try: I am a human being, not a human doing. ;-)