Avocado
Permabanned
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2013
- Messages
- 3,793
- MBTI Type
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 7w6
- Instinctual Variant
- sp/so
All things decay. All things rot into nothingness. Nothing really matters except my own personal enjoyment a freedom to follow my whims until I am put 6 feet under. The desires and welfare of others do not matter, unless it benefits me in some way. Ultimate freedom and exploration of all the world's wonders is all I desire. Perhaps once I teach a few years (I'm already too far into that route to do otherwise), I can travel write. Pleasure is the only gauge of goodness which is tangible, thus it makes sense for me to pursue visceral pleasure till I pass on. I definately made a mistake with teaching, as my heart is really into endless pleasure and indulgence, but I can always look at other teachers and use their talking points as my own when asked why I teach. I won't tell anybody it's just for the money or summers off (which it is). Instead, I will probably say something along the lines of "I believe social studies prepares children for the challenges of the real world by revealing to them in an unbiased manner the trials and tribulations which occured in the world and is still occuring in the world."
That said, I can do what is required of me and bullshit my way through interviews if it means I'll have time off and and enough pay to feed myself. I'm also not COMPLETELY guiltless, so if some kid is really trying to do well but struggling, I will expend a little more of my intellectual and emotional resources with them to help nudge them along. By and large though, I'm just very cynical about the way the world works and on top of that I don't experience joy in anything AND my body is sore all over all the time. Yes, I am being treated for depression with noticable, yet still woefully limited, success. I had a brief tryst with politics recently, but that enthusiasm didn't last very long. That could explain my desire to withdraw and sleep and eat and do nothing else, but I know from an intellectual standpoint that I have to contribute to society in some way to derserve my comforts, and that maybe if I do things I don't want to do, I'll find something to break the endless purgatory.
That said, I can do what is required of me and bullshit my way through interviews if it means I'll have time off and and enough pay to feed myself. I'm also not COMPLETELY guiltless, so if some kid is really trying to do well but struggling, I will expend a little more of my intellectual and emotional resources with them to help nudge them along. By and large though, I'm just very cynical about the way the world works and on top of that I don't experience joy in anything AND my body is sore all over all the time. Yes, I am being treated for depression with noticable, yet still woefully limited, success. I had a brief tryst with politics recently, but that enthusiasm didn't last very long. That could explain my desire to withdraw and sleep and eat and do nothing else, but I know from an intellectual standpoint that I have to contribute to society in some way to derserve my comforts, and that maybe if I do things I don't want to do, I'll find something to break the endless purgatory.