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Summer 2009: Update 1

LucrativeSid

New member
Joined
Oct 20, 2007
Messages
837
It's been about two weeks since I first posted about making the summer of 2009 the best summer of my life. I don't think it's officially summer yet, but it counts for me because it's warm outside now. Finally!

When I made my first post, I was on a roll. Then things slowed down a bit for a while. BUT, I see that it's happened and I'm now refocusing. The last two weeks surely were not bad at all - they were actually positive. I just wouldn't want my whole summer to go that way. I wasn't exhilarated. I wasn't pushing myself very hard. I was idle too much. And I didn't stick to my experiment!

We are all driven by something, even if it's something that we don't actually want to drive us. Sometimes it even drives us to not be driven. I want to fully choose the way I think and the way that I live my life, day to day, moment to moment. Nothing short of that will do. No, I will not waste my time here. I will not be a product of anything except for my own conscious decisions.

I choose to make a shift. It's going to take some commitment, but I can do it.

Here's something I wrote two weeks ago that I planned on reading every day a few times. I also planned on refining it as I went along, which I will still do. But here is the original.

I am living each moment fully and with purpose. I am spending my time doing amazing things. I am constantly sending out positive vibrations and energy and attracting positive things into my life. I love this moment and I live for this moment. I keep the big picture in mind and follow my dreams. I think positive thoughts and I do positive things. I live and love life to the best of my ability. I bring mastery to this moment because it is the only time I can enjoy challenge and the essence of living.

So, it's a little redundant but that's okay! It's about what it does, not what it seems like. I had some sort of epiphany when I wrote it. I know why, from my own perspective, affirmations should be stated in the present tense. Because looking out from within, in the present moment, is the only time you ever have the power to live. Otherwise you're just observing or judging. This is the only moment where you can rise to a challenge and conquer it. This is the only moment where you can love. This is the only moment where you can be what you want to be and do what you want to do on purpose. If you don't recognize that you are here, in this moment, with everything you need, then you are not truly living.

I often understand things pretty well but I have to put into my own perspective to make it something my brain can use.

Challenge, let's talk about that. Usually I hate waking up in the morning. I'm tired and I know I'm just going to go to work anyway so I like to hit snooze a lot. BUT! One day not long ago, my alarm clock went off way before I felt ready, and then I thought about all the "mastery of the moment" thoughts I'd been having. And I was instantly present. Fully present. And I thought, "How could I hate waking up? How could I hate having the opportunity to master this moment and conquer this challenge?" Who cares if I'm tired? Who cares if I'm going to work? I am me, and I am here, and this is life! I can OWN this. It was a great start to a great day.

I just need to remember that more often!

I don't care what the challenge is. If it's hard and fun, great! If it's hard and not fun, great! More discipline! If it's easy and not fun, great! Build discipline and breath life into that moment where it otherwise wouldn't have been. If it's easy and fun, great! You're on fire!

Sometimes, it's a challenge to go do some practical thing that needs to be done. But how can you even separate that challenge from the challenge of your entire life? It's part of the whole thing. It doesn't subtract from all of life's greatest gifts, it's part of them. Don't wait for a race to come along before you decide to be like a champion. Be a champion always, in everything that you do.

For me it is time to refocus. I want to actually start reading that thing I wrote so I can make it part of myself. I want to make that transformation. I haven't been that negative or anything, but I want to waste less times. That's a big one. There's always something more fulfilling I could be doing. Plus, I want to get my situation a little more grounded and focused when it comes to finances and crap like that. There are things I want to buy and I don't expect them for free. (Clay, speed reading program, new phone, instruments.)

Primary goal - Mental transformation.

Secondary goal - Catch up on practical things that usually bore me.

Tertiary goal - In general, just live it up!
 

LucrativeSid

New member
Joined
Oct 20, 2007
Messages
837
I've been doing great since my last update. I just want to write one thing real quick. My progress with running has been amazing so far. I started three days ago.

On the first day, I could only run for 2:15 without walking. I ended up with about 4:30 total that day. And I was exhausted big time and felt like shit for at least 10 minutes.

The second day, I ran about 4:30 straight before I had to take a break, and I finished with a little under 7 minutes of running total. I was tired, but I recovered quickly and I felt good. Way better than the first day.

On the third day, which was today, I ran for 9:56 straight! And I felt great after! (By the way, I'm going up hill half or more of the time.)

I don't have an MP3 player or anything, so that sucks. I think I figured out the mental aspect of running tonight, though. This will make it much easier.

Soon, I'll be doing a few miles at a time.
 

velocity

New member
Joined
Oct 22, 2008
Messages
477
MBTI Type
epic
:) good job kiddo!
what mental aspect of running have you figured out?
 

LucrativeSid

New member
Joined
Oct 20, 2007
Messages
837
Velocity, it will sound stupid and simplistic, but I stopped thinking of the whole thing and started thinking of it as just one step after another.
 

LucrativeSid

New member
Joined
Oct 20, 2007
Messages
837
This summer I decided to read more books. I'm trying to alternate between fiction and non-fiction. (I used to read about 8 non-fiction books for every fiction book. I don't know how many books I usually read in a year, but it can't be more than 10 or 12.)

So I don't lose track of my progress, here's what I've read since the beginning of May, 2009. (With personal ratings out of 5 stars.)

Fiction:

The Practice Effect by David Brin (3.7)
Giants Bread by Mary Westmacott (Agatha Christie) (5)
The Long Walk by Richard Bachman (Stephen King) (3.98)

Non-Fiction:

The Prince by Niccolo Machiavelli (3)
Don't Sweat the Small Stuff... And it's All Small Stuff by Richard Carlson (3)
How to Talk to Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere by Larry King (2.8)
 
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