ShadowPage
New member
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2009
- Messages
- 46
So I'm back. And that's a thing. Yay!
It figures that the one other blog post I'd ever written is so fucking depressing. Considering what's gone on for me in the years between, however, it's about right. Yea, I still wrestle with feeling comfortable enough to jump into a conversation. However, these days I'm more likely to just fucking go for it. Lawl, I just took a quick look at the rules regarding swearing. At least it doesn't seem like I can't swear at all. That's nice.
But about this post: I am horribly confused about where to go with MBTI/Jungian functions and Enneagram. I spent pretty much all day wondering which number type I felt most like. And I don't even know anything about the Enneagram. With every new little piece of information, I am constantly re-evaluating which way I lean. And it's completely eclipsed what forays I was making into determining my dominant functions since my return to the forum.
Ok, I think backing up a bit would be helpful. I want to treat my explorations of type theory and typology as if I'm new at it again. However, there are certain things that I can't go back on. I don't believe in that forced dichotomy nonsense. Picking I or E, S or N- that's a bit too arbitrary to me. Functions, however, I can get behind. So there is that. Acknowledging that I'm only interested in the Jungian Cognitive Function framework is as far as it goes, though. I don't remember what the functions do or what they are like. I get the impression that I'm likely some type of xSFx because of some of the work of one Karen Hamaker-Zondag, though. Also, my cynicism says that if I was fighting my hypothetical SF-ness that much as an unhappy teenager, it's probably about right.
But that's not really any kind of basis for figuring this puzzle out. I am no longer all that sure that knowing my type will make me feel like I have a sense of self-knowledge and direction, but I want to believe that the attempt to figure it out won't be a waste. It can't hurt, right?
...I wasn't prepared to get swept into the Enneagram, though. I spent hours flicking back and forth between various threads to see if I might be able to hone in on where I fit in without having to take any quizzes (some quizzes can be fun, but most of them are horribly BORING) or read all of the type profiles (which is probably not a good look, but I'm being straightforward here). I basically fell into a whirlpool of thinking that I'm an E6 or that I'm not an E6, flinging back and forth between descriptions (and the occasional entertaining argument) that sometimes sounded very much like me and others that I just didn't relate to even a little. It all went so fast- I didn't help myself much by going through tons of tabs on my browser at random (because that's how I internet. ), again to see if I could glean my likeliest space at high speed. Even as I write this, I have several tabs open that I fully intend to get back to!
So now I wonder if I should just put the functions down for a little while and focus on the Enneagram. The novelty factor certainly encourages that move. However, I also know how I love to have tons of things going on so that I can pretend to be highly productive.
Not to mention the fact that I just can't settle- every new piece of information makes me think that I have to reevaluate everything. One minute, I'm an E6. One article later, I'm an E1. One thread post later, I'm an E8. And so the damned thing goes. And good god, I can't even begin to make sense of all the wings and the tritypes and the instinctual variants! I have no idea how everything is supposed to piece together! But the fact that it's this whole new thing makes me want to jump in. Yea... (we see how gung-ho I am in another week, eh?)
At the moment, I suppose I should put together an actual "Please Help Me type Myself" thread. It might be a while, though. I have no idea what's really relevant about myself that I would also be ok putting out there. Life experience- I don't has it. Good self-perspective- I don't have much of that, either.
It figures that the one other blog post I'd ever written is so fucking depressing. Considering what's gone on for me in the years between, however, it's about right. Yea, I still wrestle with feeling comfortable enough to jump into a conversation. However, these days I'm more likely to just fucking go for it. Lawl, I just took a quick look at the rules regarding swearing. At least it doesn't seem like I can't swear at all. That's nice.
But about this post: I am horribly confused about where to go with MBTI/Jungian functions and Enneagram. I spent pretty much all day wondering which number type I felt most like. And I don't even know anything about the Enneagram. With every new little piece of information, I am constantly re-evaluating which way I lean. And it's completely eclipsed what forays I was making into determining my dominant functions since my return to the forum.
Ok, I think backing up a bit would be helpful. I want to treat my explorations of type theory and typology as if I'm new at it again. However, there are certain things that I can't go back on. I don't believe in that forced dichotomy nonsense. Picking I or E, S or N- that's a bit too arbitrary to me. Functions, however, I can get behind. So there is that. Acknowledging that I'm only interested in the Jungian Cognitive Function framework is as far as it goes, though. I don't remember what the functions do or what they are like. I get the impression that I'm likely some type of xSFx because of some of the work of one Karen Hamaker-Zondag, though. Also, my cynicism says that if I was fighting my hypothetical SF-ness that much as an unhappy teenager, it's probably about right.
But that's not really any kind of basis for figuring this puzzle out. I am no longer all that sure that knowing my type will make me feel like I have a sense of self-knowledge and direction, but I want to believe that the attempt to figure it out won't be a waste. It can't hurt, right?...I wasn't prepared to get swept into the Enneagram, though. I spent hours flicking back and forth between various threads to see if I might be able to hone in on where I fit in without having to take any quizzes (some quizzes can be fun, but most of them are horribly BORING) or read all of the type profiles (which is probably not a good look, but I'm being straightforward here). I basically fell into a whirlpool of thinking that I'm an E6 or that I'm not an E6, flinging back and forth between descriptions (and the occasional entertaining argument) that sometimes sounded very much like me and others that I just didn't relate to even a little. It all went so fast- I didn't help myself much by going through tons of tabs on my browser at random (because that's how I internet.
), again to see if I could glean my likeliest space at high speed. Even as I write this, I have several tabs open that I fully intend to get back to! So now I wonder if I should just put the functions down for a little while and focus on the Enneagram. The novelty factor certainly encourages that move. However, I also know how I love to have tons of things going on so that I can pretend to be highly productive.
Not to mention the fact that I just can't settle- every new piece of information makes me think that I have to reevaluate everything. One minute, I'm an E6. One article later, I'm an E1. One thread post later, I'm an E8. And so the damned thing goes. And good god, I can't even begin to make sense of all the wings and the tritypes and the instinctual variants! I have no idea how everything is supposed to piece together! But the fact that it's this whole new thing makes me want to jump in. Yea... (we see how gung-ho I am in another week, eh?)At the moment, I suppose I should put together an actual "Please Help Me type Myself" thread. It might be a while, though. I have no idea what's really relevant about myself that I would also be ok putting out there. Life experience- I don't has it. Good self-perspective- I don't have much of that, either.
