Since the paragraphs are small and the description not too long I'll go through how I feel about it paragraph by paragraph.
So this is basically saying that as an ISFJ I am PiJe? I don't have much to complain about here.
Blegh... I don't like when descriptions paint all ISFJs to be "warm and kind-hearted." I definitely would consider myself
friendly, but not exactly "warm"--but other ISFJs might not mind that kind of stuff in the descriptions as much as I do. I like the valuing harmony part, but not sure if that's because I'm an ISFJ so much as because I am a 9. I don't really see myself as bringing out the best in others more than just trying to keep it all together, and I don't really have a "firm desire to believe in the best," but that could just be me. I have the tendency to wallow in negativity unfortunately. I can't talk for how other people value me, as I'm not sure. All I know is that my friends like me because they can be comfortable around me and they like my sense of humor and we have similar interests, but not sure beyond that.
I would say yes for the most part. Though my memory's not perfect; I tend to discard anything that I don't find important. Like what color shirt was I wearing yesterday? I don't know. But I've gotten into "memory arguments" before--and won--about things people thought that happened, but I remember differently. I remember the day I saw Catching Fire in theatres, that I went to IHOP with ISTJ and INTJ, I ordered the country-fried steak, it was raining, ISTJ was panicking cuz he wanted to go see it but had to work overnight and we were arguing over whether the movie would let out soon enough for him to get home in time, I drove my crappy pickup truck down the street as fast as I could to get INTJ home because she couldn't go, it was my first time going to an AMC theatre and seeing the new comfy chairs they had and the weird seating arrangement thing... I remember this, but I don't remember what color shirt I was wearing yesterday. So I would agree with this paragraph.
"Respect tradition and laws"... ugh. That's the kind of sentence that spawns misconceptions. Tradition was already briefly mentioned in this thread so to paraphrase: tradition makes you think of a
specific kind of way of living, like "traditional" gender roles etc., when really it means a whole different thing. Spawns stereotypes. Following laws... I mean, I follow them for convenience, but if I disagree with a law I think is stupid who cares? I pirate music like daily and don't feel any remorse. So I guess what I'm saying is that I don't like the whole "tradition" word usage because of previous reasons mentioned in this thread. But the last sentence is correct: I'm not completely shut out to new ways of doing things, but you have to show me that it's
better than my current method first.
I'm definitely a hands-on kind of learner.
Showing me how to do something and having me do it myself is much better than
telling me how to do it. Though I wouldn't say that means we can't like to analyze of participate in theory--I hate math, for instance, but I actually highly enjoyed philosophy of logic, which is in essence very mathematical. I even became a supplemental instructor for it. And now I'm currently in school for sociology, which requires a lot of theorizing and analyzing--but with
people and
norms and trends rather than abstract things and numbers mumbo jumbo. Being able to practically apply something is very important--I'm not going to rack my brain trying to understand some theory that has no point because it doesn't apply to the real world. I don't really understand what "traditional methods of higher education" means. Also, I mean, just showing me that something has a practical application doesn't guarantee that I'm going to "tirelessly carry it through to completion." I can understand that something can be applied and still think it's stupid. For instance... math. I totally understand its practical application and necessities, but there's no way in hell I'm going to kill myself going into a career that requires a lot of math. Along with the last sentence, I would call myself dependable, but I think that depends on the individual mostly.
Well, I always was fascinated by interior design and my favorite part of The Sims was always making the sims and decorating the houses rather than actually playing the game.
I'm not sure I am "sensitive" to others feelings more than I am just simply driven to maintain harmony which means to consider others' feelings (even if it means I'm not "naturally" attuned to them), but, I like the gift-giving thing. I like to make personalized gifts. My ISTJ bff loves the gifts I make him. For his birthday the year before last, I spent hours compiling an "A to Z" scrapbook/binder of things that he likes--like, "A is for Ayumi Hamasaki, B is for balisong, C is for Clannad..." all the way to Z, with pictures and it was all done by hand. He keeps it on his shelf within arms reach at all times. I also made him a personalized birthday card last year too, and he loved it. Not always making gifts--one year we bought each other Ayumi Hamasaki singles for Christmas. He said he got me the cheapest one he could find on ebay that I didn't already have (thanks lol). I bought him one that I knew he loved and he wouldn't shut up for days about how "thoughtful" it was. I don't know how I started rambling for so long about gift-giving. So I guess, yeah, gift-giving is something that I'm good at--for people I know well enough anyway.
This one is tricky. I feel like I am aware of my feelings, but at the same time I have a really hard time articulating them. Sometimes I'm feeling so much that I'm not sure
what exactly it is I'm feeling. I'm actually not so much aware of other peoples' feelings as I am aware of the general emotional atmosphere around us. If you look in my private blog, you'll see that this past week I was stressed out over the "tense atmosphere" between me and my ISTJ friend and worried that I had done something wrong, but after hanging out with him yesterday, things were back to normal. I wasn't sure exactly what
he was feeling--I can't look inside his head and he's not the "sharing" type. But I knew what the atmosphere was like--last week it was heavy, and now it's friendly/bubbly/fun again.
I tend not to express feelings openly
in person, but I have no problem being a whiner and over-sharing over IM. Actually, it's gotten to the point that my friends get worried about me if I don't over-share what I'm doing every 20 minutes with them via text or IM. But if you confront me about anything "serious" that I might have shared about my feelings over text/IM
in person the next time you see me, I get really awkward, shut down, and don't talk about it. I came out to my mom over facebook and we talked and she was fine, and the next time I saw her she started talking to me about it and I immediately went into "nope" mode. In-person I'm expected to immediately respond. I like text-based mediums for talking about my feelings because I have time to think and reflect and edit myself for clarity. I also do have the tendency to become bitter--I have a problem with someone, but I don't do anything about it because I'm nervous, so I become bitter even though it's my own damn fault.
Finding a means of expressing myself is very important. For me, I think it's a mixture of my blog, ranting to others, music, and daydreaming.
I'm neutral on this, leaning towards agree. Especially in person/real-time, I tend to only express the "positive" and keep any of the negative bottled up. I wish I was better about speaking up for people who need help. I can't think of an example where I've done this really. I find listening to other people talk about their emotions awkward because I'm a big hypocrite. Or maybe it's because I feel responsible for "fixing" their negativity to make them their "usual happy self" again.
I would agree with this, especially in a work atmosphere. I was often taken advantage of as an employee, made to work 40-hour work weeks while only getting part-time benefits because I could be depended on. And I was very aware of being taken advantage of, and I was bitter, but I was too nervous to stand up for myself or stay anything. It was a very distressing situation to be in. Learning to say "no" is a big problem of mine--in my disaster of a thread "How can I make my Fe not suck," there's a brief discussion about me having a hard time saying no to a kid who wanted to borrow a pencil every single day, which I found annoying. Disliking conflict is 100% of the matter for me, but also remember that being a 9, this may be different for me than for ISFJs who aren't 9s.
Big misconception: I don't actually place other people's needs above my own. I'm pretty fucking selfish actually. I only really care about myself and the few people I deem important to me. But the reason I have problems saying "no" and such is because I need harmony to function. I don't like even the littlest bit of conflict. I'm super sensitive to criticism, even if it's constructive, and so much as being around someone who slightly raises their voice makes me want to run away and hide. The reason I have trouble saying no etc. is more because I am able to see how my actions affect the other person--I once forced myself to stay friends with someone I didn't really like because "telling them I don't want to be friends anymore is mean." As in, if I were in their situation, I would be hurt, especially since they wouldn't be able to see where my feelings were coming from as I kept them concealed. I'm able to pretty easily see how actions affect consequences, especially in social situations, which holds me back from wanting to do anything that would cause harm to others because I would hate it if that happened to me, and I guess I take "treat others the way you want to be treated" more seriously than I really need to.
Yes! YES!!! I get super insecure super easily. I
need reassurance. It's essential. I rarely get it because I won't ask for it or force it out of people, and find myself getting taken for granted a lot. RE: my bitterness issues. RE: my issues standing up for myself. RE: my problems in work environments. If I don't get any reassurance, I start to regret my actions and see what I've done as annoying or bothersome to others. The second half of the above paragraph is basically inferior Ne--and unfortunately it happens to me
a lot.
No, no, yes. I'm not warm--just friendly for the sake of friendliness. I'm not generous--I'm pretty selfish and even the "kind" things that I do are for the benefit of myself in some way. I would say I am dependable though. I'm not so much sensitive to others as I am to myself and what I want. I do need to remember not to be so critical of myself.
I DO NOT! "freely dispense" warmth and love to others. I fucking hate expressing those kinds of feelings because it's super awkward. I hate saying "thank you" and I hate even more when people thank me.
Example of actual situation I have been in:
ISTJ: Hey ISFJ, thanks for helping me the other day.
ISFJ: (confused, nervous, and on-the-spot) Shut the fuck up.
If I'm going to express gratitude or love to someone, I absolutely do it through actions and not words. I am not gushy. I--you know... I'll actually just point to the golden quote in my signature for this.
Wow um... I'm sorry if you weren't asking for/prepared for a response this long. I got a little carried away.