Quiet's Thoughts...

[Quiet]

It's been three days since I first sighned up on Typology Central. I've browsed this place and made myself aware of how it works. I belong to another forum, so I have a pretty good gist. I'm hoping to share a bit about myself and about my life here. You are welcome to post on my blog if you'd wish...

My present thoughts are quite simply that I am tired. It's been a long and frustrating day for many reasons but I'm hangin' in there because tomorrow needs me. I count my blessings and try and ignore my complains because if I don't, I'll lose all motivation entirely. Motivation... I have been pondering this lately. I have been questioning what motivates me. The list is long, but I guess I'm a big believer in Karma, and I'm superstitous too. I guess being a good person has some basis of selfishness if I'm really honest. I will write more tomorrow, as I'm pretty tired at the moment and I'm afraid this first entry is far more boring than I realized.

Quiet Thoughts...

 

[Quiet]

http://www.typologycentral.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=4582&stc=1&d=1267839767

It's been a tough day. I haven't felt this tired a long time. I know most of this can be avoided, and it seems to take a long time for me to sort out my feelings so I can understand what's really going on. I enjoy living in my head for the most part, but while I'm happily wandering around in my mental oblivion, life outside of me comes crashing down around me and I am so helpless. Procrastination grips my shoulders deeming me paralyzed while I rack my brain. I wonder what pieces are worth picking up and which ones I should just leave alone. I'll stand there and analyze it for a while and yes, I think I'm crazy too...

It's a quiet friday night outside my window. It's always quiet outside my window. Nothing but trees and horses. I like my life this way; if only my relationships weren't so hard. I have hoped for all my life, to have a strong connection to another to call them "soulmate". It's something of an impossibility though, after my soulmate has always just been myself both in sad times and in joy. These things I have always trusted to fully apreciate when I've been by myself...

My head is clearer now. I guess I just needed to think it out and get it organized. I cryptically share with you my inner workings, and yes, the picture is of me.

Quiet Thoughts...

 

[Quiet]

Well, it's late now and I should be getting to bed. However, it's one of those times when I'm literally too tired to get off my chair... sigh.

I have to work tomorrow and I wish I could just sleep in. Oh well, off to bed I go... but, I just realized that my butt's gone to sleep.

So Gnite all,

Silly Quiet thoughts...

 

[Quiet]

It's been a beautiful weather day. The sun is out, the air is sweet with spring blossoms everywhere and the grass is as green as emerald. The trees outside in the yard have pretty buds and some flowers already, and they come in many colors. Some purple, pink, yellow and white. I've spent a good amount of time outside at home today, enjoying the natural surroundings I am so lucky to live in. I've been thinking of many things...

One thing I have thought about was my discoveries so far on this forum. I have been reading a bit on ENFP's and I think out of all the types, they seem to be the sweetest and most pleasant of folk. I plan to learn more about ENFP's by continuing to browse the threads and posts. I'm glad I found this place

Quiet Thoughts...

 

[Quiet]

Well I'm sick, so being so chronically exsausted these past 10 days or so makes perfect sense now. Meh, I worked this morning then emailed my prof to tell her I was going to be absent today. I slept for the afternoon and woke up feeling even worse. I had to run errands in town and I can't remember a thing about the day.

On a lighter note, I know I'm loved. I love a few select people in my life. I have thought of them each and every day for many months. I miss them because they live far away. Its amazing how people can touch your life if you let them. That, and if you let them know how important they are to you. I can't wait to see them all someday...

I rock in my rocking chair beside the crackling fire blazing in the woodstove. I'm too comfortable to get up and sit at my computer. I'm writing this from my blackberry. I think its helping my fever. I just feel I'm drifting in a wierd psychadelic trip and I haven't even taken any good cold and flu symptom relief.

I wonder what tomorrow will be like. I hope everyone has a good day. How come I can love so strong and be so still. So quiet. Its all in there.

Quiet thoughts...

 

[Elf]

beautiful thoughts

 

[Quiet]

I'm not too sure what to write today. It has been a crazy week to be honest, and I feel like I just got battered about by an intense wind each day. It's saturday evening, and I'm just staying home tonight and catching up on some homework and projects. I can't seem to stop feeling thirsty though. I think it's because I didn't get enough hours sleep last night, so I should try and get an earlier night tonight. Sigh... I'm trying to block emotions, and I'm actually doing pretty good. I fear delving into shadow mode while under a lot of stress and pressure from work and school. As long as I keep a close check on myself though, I should be ok... I'd rather be the one to check myself in before I get too far gone, than have someone else call the cops, while I'm busy doing something criminal or bizzar because I've lost my mind and acting wierd in public. (as if)

Quiet thoughts...

 

[Quiet]

Looking back on the last year of my life has given me a feeling of failure. I didn't do as well as I wanted to last semester, and now I'm feeling unsure of what to take this coming up term. Work was stressful too, and I met with my supervisor a while ago regarding a client's complaint about me. I was horrified to have upset anyone and to learn that I had apparently behaved rudely. I sort of recalled the incident, but I know it was mainly due to a lack of "expression and animation" on my part when I was actually disturbed by a client's family's behavior. Apparently I wasn't being friendly enough, I was just polite. Sigh.

I had a great experience a week ago today. I received an energy cleanse. It was so relaxing to just be lying on my back while a professional performed reiki on my aura and energy field. I walked around feeling lighter and less burdoned for a few days, and today I have noticed I am back to the downward spiral of self doubt and negative self reflection. Maybe I'm just PMS'ing, but is it crazy of me to question if I'm good enough? I have a nasty X who continues to be a bully, I'm running out of extra funds thanks to my lawyer. However, if others can manage their stress, I should be able to do the same.

Socially, I've been pretty lame in that department. I think I'm just overwealed these days. My best friend just moved to another country and I miss him a lot. Sigh, I wish this blog entry wasn't so negative, but I guess I feel better for writing it. I'll just keep my chin up and keep on keepin' on.

Quiet thoughts.