Please help, I need typing

[nihilistjellyfish-420]

I really need help settling on a type, and accepting it if I hate it. I know I put ISFP 4w5, but I'm really unsure.

• Very likely a 6w5 or 4w5
• Literally diagnosed with autism, anorexia, and CPTSD. Father died at age 5, mother took solace in drinking which rendered her unavailable so I was neglected, got an abusive step-father, and came into care and became overprotected since age 12
• First every 16Personalities result was INTP, followed by IXFP. I've became aware that due to early maltreatment, I've clung to MBTI, particularly the INTP label, for an identity and sense of community. I've doubted I'm an INTP, and questioned whether i use it as a true reflection of my cognition, or just as a facade to look more intelligent and to stave off insecurity.
• Since age 11, I've identified as transgender male, had body image issues and struggled with my identity. I think about myself and who I am a lot. If I was a phrase, I'd be "Who am I?"
• I used to cling to a particular aesthetic, like I was an emo poser at one point, but now I just don't know and don't care. I don't know who I am. I don't wear any particular style.
• On top of that, I think about MBTI and Enneagram A HELL OF A LOT. I can't ever get my mind of it. When I watch a movie, I'm dying to know what the typings would be.
• Sensitive and easily offended by bullying. It can take me hours, if not days on end, to finally cheer up after feeling extremely miserable and insecure.
• Acknowledging that I may be an Fi-dom makes me feel very, very sad and hate myself, to the point of it interfering with my ability to enjoy anything and be happy
• Craves external validation, likes getting upvotes and opinions etc
• I feel really small and powerless when around real NT's and ISTP's because they bully, manipulate, gaslight and just do things to me that make me feel sad, insecure, and resentful
• I've considered ISFP due to high Fi and Se, however I see no tert Ni or inf Te. I don't have any particular goal in life; I don't think about the real meaning of things; however, I do sometimes get called a "deep thinker"
• Neither can I be an INXP because I'm actually really aware of my surroundings. I don't live in complex daydreams all the time.
• I might not be IXTP because the inf Fe actually makes them fairly socially adept for introverts. IXTJ's and IXFP's are the real introverts with little to no interest in making friends.
• All my life I've had no friends. No interest in making friends except for perks such as things I wouldn't normally be allowed, such as drugs, internet access, pet animals, or a bicycle.
• No emotional attachment to family, only sees them to not disappoint them.
• People describe me as loyal and reliable.
• I like to study and analyse things for their own sake; I can be extremely analytical, curious, and academic. Right now, one of my interests is lucid dreaming (trying to) and for ages I've been infatutated with MBTI and psychoactive drugs
• I'm very attentive to detail and even make databases and statistics on my laptop of the content of my dreams or what food I eat
• I have a large-is vocabulary
• I'm notorious for being obsessive and hyperfixating on one thing, to the point when it's unhealthy
• I am extremely honest and prefer to tell the truth over hurting someone's feelings, however, I may sometimes warn someone that I'm about to tell them something they may not like
• However, I can be oblivious to logical fallacies in my own speech or text and people point it out and I become aware of it
• Especially when younger, I had emotional dysregulation issues. I would regularly have very violent temper tantrums, throwing things, destroying rooms, and having people leave. I would sometimes even pretend to be a cat or robot as a metaphor for my emotions but only get misunderstood and teased. I think this died down as i got older.
• I get described as "edgy"
• I'm easily bored, and my ability to enjoy an activity is highly variable and unpredictable
• I'm bored without the internet and extremely frustrated when it is took away. I love to learn, make friends and hang out, and let my mind branch out
• I have very spontaneous, tree-like way of thinking. I forget to say to my therapist when it's time to see him.
• I cant really relate to the IXTP thing of accidentally offending others. However, I dislike it when people are strict with manners and swearing.
• Most of the time I feel flat, anhedonic, and apathetic. I don't give a damn to what's going on around me and concerned with my own affairs. I'm also a nihilist. I am fine dying early, I don't think life has a meaning.
• I don't know myself very well. I don't know why I'm transgender, why I have an ED, why I'm so obsessed with MBTI.
• I'm a very serious person who hates silliness and jokes.
• My pet peeves are slow walkers, rudeness, lack of attention to detail, children, ignorance, excessively soft and quiet voices (I have misophonia)
• I want MBTI, Enneagram, wings, tritype, instinctual variants and maybe more obscure stuff.

It would be nice if you ask further questions about me, so I could perhaps get a clearer and more detailed insight.

 

[Paisley]

Could you sort these points on your list into categories of Introverted/Extroverted (I/E), Intuitive/Sensing (N/S), Feeling/Thinking (F/T), and Judging/Perceiving (J/P)? It might help distill the information more adequately into a type.

One thing comes to mind right away:

Your use of point form to write this down, and make a list, is very structured and organized and also grand and holistic in it's scope, and you said you have a very tree-like way of thinking, very attentive to detail, some preferences towards structure, which reads J to me, not P. I could be way off track on that, who knows, just a thought. I often think of the judging function as a black hole sucking information into it's categories and proper placement, whereas I think of the perceiver function like a supernova of information exploding and bouncing outward. That's why I see the energy of a J as more exacting and the energy of a P as more bouncy.

If people drain you and you seek solitude; Introvert.

If you're into MBTI and Enneagram, way more likely you're an Intuitive, but it's up to you to decide if you're more abstract or more concrete.

I have no idea if you're a Thinker or a Feeler. The points read both ways.

Take your time and keep an open mind, typing isn't a science as these systems won't fully define you, only you can define you.

Also, all the best musicians are ISFP's, they're amazing.

Also also, I appreciate the honesty.

 

[nihilistjellyfish-420]

Could you sort these points on your list into categories of Introverted/Extroverted (I/E), Intuitive/Sensing (N/S), Feeling/Thinking (F/T), and Judging/Perceiving (J/P)? It might help distill the information more adequately into a type.

One thing comes to mind right away:

Your use of point form to write this down, and make a list, is very structured and organized and also grand and holistic in it's scope, and you said you have a very tree-like way of thinking, very attentive to detail, some preferences towards structure, which reads J to me, not P. I could be way off track on that, who knows, just a thought. I often think of the judging function as a black hole sucking information into it's categories and proper placement, whereas I think of the perceiver function like a supernova of information exploding and bouncing outward. That's why I see the energy of a J as more exacting and the energy of a P as more bouncy.

If people drain you and you seek solitude; Introvert.

If you're into MBTI and Enneagram, way more likely you're an Intuitive, (bias, I know, lolz) but it's up to you to decide if you're more abstract or more concrete.

I have no idea if you're a Thinker or a Feeler. The points read both ways.

Take your time and keep an open mind, typing isn't a science as these systems won't fully define you, only you can define you.

Also, all the best musicians are ISFP's, they're amazing.

Also also, I appreciate the honesty.

Sorry for the late reply, but I'd like to inform you that typing by cognitive functions is almost always much more accurate and reliable than dichotomies.

 

[Paisley]

Sorry for the late reply, but I'd like to inform you that typing by cognitive functions is almost always much more accurate and reliable than dichotomies.

The suggestion was to sort your points into categories to help you really think about where you fit. If you prefer cognitive functions and know how to sort your points into cognitive functions before establishing a type, perhaps try that.

This test seems to do that: https://jung.test.typologycentral.com/