INFtha14
:)
- Joined
- Dec 9, 2008
- Messages
- 1,844
- MBTI Type
- INFP
- Enneagram
- 6w7
- Instinctual Variant
- sp/sx
Hey TCs back up 
.
Back to the counseling session hehe.
T vs F is the process/tool used before "Choosing" an action associated with values. It's a decision making process. A way of internal processing. Two different ways of doing so T or F.
* Values are "choosing" to be kind, cheerful, helpful, what you "choose" to do with that five dollar bill on the sidewalk. "How" you choose comes down to T or F (decision making).
Some notes of mine after the session focused on my MBTI type.
"After I said how after my fathers passing. I would push away going deeper with emotion regarding it when finally I was sitting on my bed feeling such tension/fear. And I then realized that I needed to let it out, that was the only way I was going to process this and to feel better. My exact thoughts at the time was "Best way out is through and if I keep repressing it, that will come back stronger next time/harder to deal with".
Told my counselor how when my mother came in to tell me about the lawyer quiting (also told me a couple days prior how he was seeming like he was going to). I said "okay". Then she said something else I can't remember exactly, I said "okay". She got mad at me and let me know when stuff would concern me (). I went onto to say to my counselor how I didn't know what she wanted from me especially when I came home to find out that he redirected her to another lawyer that would help her out just the same . Well okay so she's ok then.
My counselor asked me "When your friends tell you things for the first time that are bothering them or something has happened your sympathetic right? "Yeah :-D".
Then I said how "with my mom though I see what's happening everyday. I know what's going on. And also she's been telling me how the lawyer been thinking of giving up being a lawyer (isn't anything new . So I kind of figured it out already..."
She told me how it seems perhaps my mom was wanting more of an emphathic response "Oh no! That's got to be tough mom. What are you going to do now!?" So on and so on.
Being a thinker would explain why my mom (a feeler) and I keep confusing and frustrating each other at times. Makes sense at the times when I feel like "okay everything is good now, why is she making something out of nothing?" when really she is "more" in tune with her emotions.
My counselor after hearing a few more examples of my experiences she told me that on the T vs F scale I'm definitely on the T side. I kept telling her how I'm a very sensitive person though XD and it seems F is stereotyped as sensitive,kind and stuff. (that's when she told me about what "values" really are = a Choice. How we "decide" upon that value(s) that we choose is where T vs F comes in.) She told me how my process of going over things is a very rational way of going about dealing with situations such as the passing of my dad/dealing with issues. I've had this counselor since sometime in january or middle of febuary.
" Thinking and feeling are both rational functions used for judgement. Both follow the laws of reason and function to evaluate the constant flow of perceptions". I notice in relation to this bolded statement I agree they both do follow the laws of reason. And I think this made it click for me. Made me realize that yeah sometimes I neglect the people aspect but I "value" them highly so I seek improvement on this. I see how "feeling" types definitely comes from a more people place and sometimes to their demise lol. I think I'm just highly sensitive to things. I kept stressing to my counselor 'but I'm so sensitive and determined to have meaning, passion for the work I do etc." She again went onto to "values" XD.
The next day or two I had a revelation about how I "decided" I was going to go deeper inside myself and explore. I immediately went to how if I would keep repressing it and not dealing with it (emotion), it would keep occuring and would create more problems (health, mental,emotional,physical). Had thought of the patterns that could of unfolded. At a recent meetup one of the people said how "if we all start young like this young girl we could probably avoid alot of physical ailments, such as various health complications. (I heard somewhere that if someone is depressed and holding onto grief they are increasing their risk of heart disease/weaking the heart muscle). Deal with it/problems before they become the aching kneee/hurting back/unexpected illness (definitely my reasoning at the time. It was my reasoning because I pondered over as a result of my dads passing "why do people get sick?". I wanted to understand).
I often wondered why my dad got cancer shortly after his passing after thinking abit and I had thought maybe it has to do with a repressing something inside/not being true to ones self/nature, what they want in life to be happy/fulfilled. So then... on went my journey inside myself :-D. I used to run away from sad songs that went deep into emotion. I didn't like them at all. It made me uncomfortable and as a kid I just couldn't understand why my sister would go through the effort of listening to sad song just to cry? XD. Now I know... after "reasoning" that it is a good thing to let the emotion happen as I feel it inside. To not run away and resist it's influence or push the feeling away, change the station or tv. Been happier ever sense. Less scared of what "emotion" can do. Emotion does alot of good and I'm grateful for embracing it. :-D. It truly is a beautiful part of life to be experienced. Adds color and meaning, depth. It would be a sad world without "emotion". I can't believe how far I've come (actually I can). I can actually listen to "everybreath you take by sting" etc and not want to change it or run away. I actually enjoy "feeling" missing my grandparents that passed before I was 13 and now my dad.
///
My own thoughts upon reflection.
Explains how when times also we'll have moments where we've had a bit of mishap and she won't talk to me which confuses me because I'd really like to work it out with her and move on/make amends.
I remember one time when I was trying to understand something and it actually made senseP) so I actually felt like a butt LOL. I saw the "reason" behind it so I then understood. When I saw originally my sisters making the same mistakes over and over again then my mom always going to listen to them I "thought" at the time she was enabling them to keep making mistakes. Then when I asked this "Hey mom, just curious. Why do you pick up the phone everytime they call when it seems they keep getting themselves in the same mess over and over?"
She told me "Well... I guess I worry that with all the problems that they are going through that if when they call and are not able to get it off there chest that they may go crazy one of these days. I can relate as I've been there myself". Me: ":O... okay. Guess that explains it well lol. I don't want them going crazy either."
Then by hearing how my sister jenn was doing the best she could with what she had in her particular situation I didn't feel so judgemental about her. She was trying, that's all that mattered. All because a rationale was explained to me that it was made clear that allowed me to understand my mother, sisters too.
:-D. Well that's my thoughts for the night. Hope all is well with my TypeC peeps.
.Back to the counseling session hehe.
T vs F is the process/tool used before "Choosing" an action associated with values. It's a decision making process. A way of internal processing. Two different ways of doing so T or F.
* Values are "choosing" to be kind, cheerful, helpful, what you "choose" to do with that five dollar bill on the sidewalk. "How" you choose comes down to T or F (decision making).
Some notes of mine after the session focused on my MBTI type.
"After I said how after my fathers passing. I would push away going deeper with emotion regarding it when finally I was sitting on my bed feeling such tension/fear. And I then realized that I needed to let it out, that was the only way I was going to process this and to feel better. My exact thoughts at the time was "Best way out is through and if I keep repressing it, that will come back stronger next time/harder to deal with".
Told my counselor how when my mother came in to tell me about the lawyer quiting (also told me a couple days prior how he was seeming like he was going to). I said "okay". Then she said something else I can't remember exactly, I said "okay". She got mad at me and let me know when stuff would concern me (
). I went onto to say to my counselor how I didn't know what she wanted from me especially when I came home to find out that he redirected her to another lawyer that would help her out just the same . Well okay so she's ok then. My counselor asked me "When your friends tell you things for the first time that are bothering them or something has happened your sympathetic right? "Yeah :-D".
Then I said how "with my mom though I see what's happening everyday. I know what's going on
. And also she's been telling me how the lawyer been thinking of giving up being a lawyer (isn't anything new . So I kind of figured it out already..."She told me how it seems perhaps my mom was wanting more of an emphathic response "Oh no! That's got to be tough mom. What are you going to do now!?" So on and so on.
Being a thinker would explain why my mom (a feeler) and I keep confusing and frustrating each other at times. Makes sense at the times when I feel like "okay everything is good now, why is she making something out of nothing?" when really she is "more" in tune with her emotions.
My counselor after hearing a few more examples of my experiences she told me that on the T vs F scale I'm definitely on the T side. I kept telling her how I'm a very sensitive person though XD and it seems F is stereotyped as sensitive,kind and stuff. (that's when she told me about what "values" really are = a Choice. How we "decide" upon that value(s) that we choose is where T vs F comes in.) She told me how my process of going over things is a very rational way of going about dealing with situations such as the passing of my dad/dealing with issues. I've had this counselor since sometime in january or middle of febuary.
" Thinking and feeling are both rational functions used for judgement. Both follow the laws of reason and function to evaluate the constant flow of perceptions". I notice in relation to this bolded statement I agree they both do follow the laws of reason. And I think this made it click for me. Made me realize that yeah sometimes I neglect the people aspect but I "value" them highly so I seek improvement on this. I see how "feeling" types definitely comes from a more people place and sometimes to their demise lol. I think I'm just highly sensitive to things. I kept stressing to my counselor 'but I'm so sensitive and determined to have meaning, passion for the work I do etc." She again went onto to "values" XD.
The next day or two I had a revelation about how I "decided" I was going to go deeper inside myself and explore. I immediately went to how if I would keep repressing it and not dealing with it (emotion), it would keep occuring and would create more problems (health, mental,emotional,physical). Had thought of the patterns that could of unfolded. At a recent meetup one of the people said how "if we all start young like this young girl we could probably avoid alot of physical ailments, such as various health complications. (I heard somewhere that if someone is depressed and holding onto grief they are increasing their risk of heart disease/weaking the heart muscle). Deal with it/problems before they become the aching kneee/hurting back/unexpected illness (definitely my reasoning at the time. It was my reasoning because I pondered over as a result of my dads passing "why do people get sick?". I wanted to understand).
I often wondered why my dad got cancer shortly after his passing after thinking abit and I had thought maybe it has to do with a repressing something inside/not being true to ones self/nature, what they want in life to be happy/fulfilled. So then... on went my journey inside myself :-D. I used to run away from sad songs that went deep into emotion. I didn't like them at all. It made me uncomfortable and as a kid I just couldn't understand why my sister would go through the effort of listening to sad song just to cry? XD. Now I know... after "reasoning" that it is a good thing to let the emotion happen as I feel it inside. To not run away and resist it's influence or push the feeling away, change the station or tv. Been happier ever sense. Less scared of what "emotion" can do. Emotion does alot of good and I'm grateful for embracing it. :-D. It truly is a beautiful part of life to be experienced. Adds color and meaning, depth. It would be a sad world without "emotion". I can't believe how far I've come (actually I can
). I can actually listen to "everybreath you take by sting" etc and not want to change it or run away. I actually enjoy "feeling" missing my grandparents that passed before I was 13 and now my dad. ///
My own thoughts upon reflection.
Explains how when times also we'll have moments where we've had a bit of mishap and she won't talk to me which confuses me because I'd really like to work it out with her and move on/make amends
. I remember one time when I was trying to understand something and it actually made sense
P) so I actually felt like a butt LOL. I saw the "reason" behind it so I then understood. When I saw originally my sisters making the same mistakes over and over again then my mom always going to listen to them I "thought" at the time she was enabling them to keep making mistakes. Then when I asked this "Hey mom, just curious. Why do you pick up the phone everytime they call when it seems they keep getting themselves in the same mess over and over?"She told me "Well... I guess I worry that with all the problems that they are going through that if when they call and are not able to get it off there chest that they may go crazy one of these days. I can relate as I've been there myself". Me: ":O... okay. Guess that explains it well lol. I don't want them going crazy either."
Then by hearing how my sister jenn was doing the best she could with what she had in her particular situation I didn't feel so judgemental about her. She was trying, that's all that mattered. All because a rationale was explained to me that it was made clear that allowed me to understand my mother, sisters too
.:-D. Well that's my thoughts for the night. Hope all is well with my TypeC peeps.
