Chimerical
Permabanned
- Joined
- Apr 30, 2008
- Messages
- 898
- MBTI Type
- INTJ
- Enneagram
- 1w5
Closer. I feel just a little bit closer to a desire state of being. A universal state where nothing matters to me. I'm getting to a point where all I really care about is entertainment.
Even here there are problems, I'm looking externally for entertainment too much. Though the outside world amuses me reguardless I would rather be amuses by my own internal world 100% thus there's no need to seek out fun. I can stay in one spot and not care.
Mostly I've been going with the "it's like reality tv, only better cause I'm actually there" attitude. Someone tried to fight me because a girl he liked was flirting with me the other day. But I didn't really care and acted as if he wasn't there. Initially I didn't flirt with her till she said something really funny and smart, then I gained interest and started flirting back.
He got more angry but I didn't care. He threatened to fight me and I didn't care. Nothing mattered to me.
But I'm worried because there's so much violence out there from frustrated people who care too much. The less I care the more violent situations I notice.
Even here there are problems, I'm looking externally for entertainment too much. Though the outside world amuses me reguardless I would rather be amuses by my own internal world 100% thus there's no need to seek out fun. I can stay in one spot and not care.
Mostly I've been going with the "it's like reality tv, only better cause I'm actually there" attitude. Someone tried to fight me because a girl he liked was flirting with me the other day. But I didn't really care and acted as if he wasn't there. Initially I didn't flirt with her till she said something really funny and smart, then I gained interest and started flirting back.
He got more angry but I didn't care. He threatened to fight me and I didn't care. Nothing mattered to me.
But I'm worried because there's so much violence out there from frustrated people who care too much. The less I care the more violent situations I notice.