[Fe] Is Fe fake or manipulative?

[Reverie]

I would just like to add that some people here have expressed concerns that the INFJs are somehow trying to make them "fit into society" by coaxing them be untrue to themselves. I personally express very critical, radical, rebellious views publicly in my art and am an individualist. How the NiFe is expressed for example in group activities, is INFJ may spot someone who is shy having good ideas that they keep to themselves for the fear of one thing or another. Now they may encourage in subtle ways for them to come out of their shell and contribute, maybe suggest them to a new position in the team where their talents can be more easily noticed, or just voicing "so and so... oh she had a good idea. Do you have any more perhaps"
It's not to encourage people to pretend to be who they are not or to manipulate them into doing something for your own gain...it's about uncovering potential and talent and that is already there. To enable the distinct individual personality to most authentically manifest and doing so become productive in their own unique special way. To harness everyone's individual potential to the fullest. Then mediate between all these individuals so that they can best work together and produce something wonderful, and your role because of your individual special talent as INFJ is to recognize, encourage, mediate and enable. And our motives are lofty like for "To become a society of diverse and unique individuals working together to make our world beautiful"...Hell..."world peace". And We are just that "naive" and "naff" and "fake". Sorry.

 

[Vizzy]

Is this an example of using Ti + Fe?

Towards the end of an unpaid apprenticeship, my supervisor asked me if I'd consider volunteering and helping out there in the future.
I didn't really have any desire to, but didn't want to outright accept or refuse. So I carefully answered, "Yes, I'd consider it" ('consider' being the key word) and left it at that. In that way, I was being technically honest as well as trying to be...nice.

 

[Froody Blue Gem]

Unhealthy fe certainly can be manipulative, but the function isn't inherently that way. I know that I sometimes may do little things to alter a situation, but I don't get to a point where I do it out of intensions of malice. It's not always on a completely conscious level but that function is there, working in the background. Fe takes in the emotional atmosphere, and users may want to accomodate to other people around them, or if they dislike the people and are not such a healthy user, they may use fe against them.

And I prefer not to say "fake" about the function. Fe users may fear rejection from those they feel are important and they may use fe in subtle little ways to try and keep them happy. Us fe users may not know what we want, and fe auxiliaries/fe tertiaries anyone who has fe in their stack of four but not dominant fe, may not be 100% clear on values all of the time, or that's my experience. And values may shift if people around us are pulling us in many different directions. To someone who doesn't struggle with that issue, they may be quick to call something like that out as fake.

 

[Cellmold]

Are these traits exclusive?

 

[RedAmazoneFriendZone]

I can't trust Fe because of an unhealthy parent in my past. Manipulative, knew how to hurt and control others.

Nevertheless I know all Fe users are not as weak and intellectually poor as that one. I have one teacher who is Fe and wants to encourage people. Instinctivally speaking I know I don't trust her.

I also feel she is craving for admiration and I don't feel particularly ok with that as I don't see teaching this way.


She totally ignores my Fi and she does not go deep into feelings (whereas we are developing an artistic project).

I suppose I have been avoiding Fe as well because of my past because I'm very sensitive to vibes and I jump easily to conclusion

(to protect myself). So I can't be objective about Fe users. I generally feel remote and very observant in front of them. And I realise I generally avoid them, depend how they approach me.
Whereas I am sure there are some good ones.


Again I'm not racist against Fe but my inner child always tells me "Be careful". And it is the only one I do obey to

We can all use our dominant function in a wrong way if we don't feel in harmony with ourselves first of all so, nothing against Fe but I do have a fucking good memory so.....

 

[Sundae]

it can be manipulative, but not necessarily fake.

 

[Sacrophagus]

Talking about unhealthy Fe.

Some Fe-doms who only wants to be admired and recognized have the habit of instinctively telling me "I'm being sincere and honest when I tell you blablabla", because I find most of their drivel some sycophantism of sorts and I can see well into their empty speech.

That wide Fe certainly shakes in front of a grounded and deeply rooted Fi that doesn't care what it thinks.