Hi everyone
I would soo appreciate some feedback from ISTJ males mostly (dont mind females) but also if there are any INFPs in a relationship with an ISTJ partner. This might be long but I'll try my best to keep it brief. Ok so my boyfriend and I are both 25 years old, met in high school and have been together for 8 years. When we first started going out he always went out of his way to see me, do things for me, he was thougtful you know everything us girls really want from our boyfriends. But after like the first or second year he just never was that way anymore. Instead I was the one always going out of my way for him, doing everything I could to see him. We have broken up a couple times within those 8 years because we just bump heads so much. We see things soo different! I know he loves me but it's like I just want simple things from him that he can't see to give me, like giving me attention telling me I love you more often, putting me first. It's so frustrating because I do all those things for him ALWAYS! And I know he likes that about me. And I just want that from him! It make me the happiest person when he does.*
Anyways over a year ago I brokeup with him for good! (at least I thought so, I never felt more sure of moving on) when he noticed I was serious n I totally let him go it was about a month or two without speaking which we have never done! (especially on my part I could never fully let him go!). It was as if he had an epiphany and came crying to me begging me to forgive him for all he's done wrong, that he was sorry for taking me for granted, he wanted to marry me, and put me first and do all the things I'd been begging for him to do. Well this went on for two months because like I said I really didn't want to be with him anymore I was sick of crying over someone I felt didn't trly love me and appreciate me for all if done over the years. So I finally gave in mostly because I felt horrible seeing him so depressed and of course I still cared deeply for him. At that point he treated me even better than he had did!! For months I could believe it!!!! It was just a total different person! BUT I have so much hurt from past things he's done to me that whenever I drank or got upset with him I would bring up the past and just lash out at him eventually he grew tired and went back to the one person he was =(. So now he's not sure he wants to marry me saying things are just so messed up we argue alot and don't see eye to eye on somethings. Which is true but I love him and I want to marry him my biggest regret is that I brought up the past when everything was at it's greatest point.
Sooo what do I do people I feel lost I wish he could go back to being how he was being soo lovig towards me
I would love some insight. I have leflt a few details out because It would have been too much...please help!!
I would soo appreciate some feedback from ISTJ males mostly (dont mind females) but also if there are any INFPs in a relationship with an ISTJ partner. This might be long but I'll try my best to keep it brief. Ok so my boyfriend and I are both 25 years old, met in high school and have been together for 8 years. When we first started going out he always went out of his way to see me, do things for me, he was thougtful you know everything us girls really want from our boyfriends. But after like the first or second year he just never was that way anymore. Instead I was the one always going out of my way for him, doing everything I could to see him. We have broken up a couple times within those 8 years because we just bump heads so much. We see things soo different! I know he loves me but it's like I just want simple things from him that he can't see to give me, like giving me attention telling me I love you more often, putting me first. It's so frustrating because I do all those things for him ALWAYS! And I know he likes that about me. And I just want that from him! It make me the happiest person when he does.*
Anyways over a year ago I brokeup with him for good! (at least I thought so, I never felt more sure of moving on) when he noticed I was serious n I totally let him go it was about a month or two without speaking which we have never done! (especially on my part I could never fully let him go!). It was as if he had an epiphany and came crying to me begging me to forgive him for all he's done wrong, that he was sorry for taking me for granted, he wanted to marry me, and put me first and do all the things I'd been begging for him to do. Well this went on for two months because like I said I really didn't want to be with him anymore I was sick of crying over someone I felt didn't trly love me and appreciate me for all if done over the years. So I finally gave in mostly because I felt horrible seeing him so depressed and of course I still cared deeply for him. At that point he treated me even better than he had did!! For months I could believe it!!!! It was just a total different person! BUT I have so much hurt from past things he's done to me that whenever I drank or got upset with him I would bring up the past and just lash out at him eventually he grew tired and went back to the one person he was =(. So now he's not sure he wants to marry me saying things are just so messed up we argue alot and don't see eye to eye on somethings. Which is true but I love him and I want to marry him my biggest regret is that I brought up the past when everything was at it's greatest point.
Sooo what do I do people I feel lost I wish he could go back to being how he was being soo lovig towards me I would love some insight. I have leflt a few details out because It would have been too much...please help!!
