[INFJ] INFJ - Question about your inner monolouge

[nightning]

Here's a thought... when we are nervous, all of us, regardless of type, tend to rehearse before the big day. I've been told guys practice what to say in front of a mirror all the time before a date... So that might not be a good way of looking at it.

What about when you're trying to address a question? How do you talk to yourself in that case? When your "inner voice" makes a suggestion to you, do you feel that it's you making the suggestion or somebody else?

lol... as in "Do I actually talk to people in my head, or do I merely critique their logic and grammar and have them yell at me?"

Answer to both would be nice... My imaginary friend says if they yelled at you (or if you actually imagined that they yelled at you) then perhaps it's not an Ni thing afterall... I seriously think it depends on the interactions... whether you treat them as people or representation of people or just a part of your consciousness.

 

[prplchknz]

I feel like somebody else is making the suggestion, if I was making the suggestion I wouldn't need an internal dialogue. Well I mean it's the person I imagine I'm speaking to responding.

 

[nightning]

I feel like somebody else is making the suggestion, if I was making the suggestion I wouldn't need an internal dialogue.

*scratches head* If you came up with the idea... how do you determine the merit of something without an internal dialogue? Please excuse these very basic no-brainer questions... I'm trying to see if there's a difference between Ni dominant vs Fi dominant thinking.

 

[prplchknz]

hmm I guess you can't. But alot of times when I follow something without an internal dialogue it' normally because I just thought of it 5 seconds before. Lot of times those end up being the "Oh god, what have done" experiences. I'm sure their's a ton of differences between Ni and Fi dominant thinking. I'm also not totally sure I am an INFP.

It's also possible we are misunderstanding one another, so for all I know we could be talking two totally different things.

 

[Kyrielle]

I do it all the time. Sometimes to the point that I forget I haven't talked to the actual person and, especially in cases of emails, etc, forget that I still owe them a reply.

/agree

Especially when it's an issue between yourself and someone else...and you've talked it all out in your head. Only to realise later, when you see that person again, that you haven't talked about the issue at hand yet. Oh that feeling of dread and annoyance at having to talk through it all all over again.

 

[Shinzon]

*

 

[Kyrielle]

What about when you're trying to address a question? How do you talk to yourself in that case? When your "inner voice" makes a suggestion to you, do you feel that it's you making the suggestion or somebody else?

Yes. Someone else that I recognise is a part of me, but is, at the same time, not me. It's as if a certain aspect of myself has split off and become another person. They're like the peanut gallery, and aren't anyone I really know in real life.

 

[ladypinkington]

You knoe, this just makes me wonder if INFJ's are the best suited for getting the most out of therapy,lol.

 

[cascadeco]

The peoples' responses I most relate to, I think, is prplchxxx (whatever your user name is.. ;-).

I guess I don't really think about 'how' I think, even though I do spend most of my time in my head, thinking about stuff. But it's always my own voice, as I'm thinking over things, or mulling over problems- no third parties, or 'outside' voices, or alter-personas..I can't really relate to that piece. It's always just me and my thoughts.

I do often do what prplcxxx does, though, where I'll play out different scenarios/conversations, and all of the possible responses/outcomes, and how I'll then in turn react to all of the possibilities..but I guess I assumed everyone did this. Often I'll get so wrapped up in doing this that it'll be like I'm there -- like I'm actually 'seeing' the things unfold in my mind, so I become unaware of my immediate surroundings. Well....like dreaming, or like when you're reading a book and you're just 'there', watching the story unfold as you're reading it.

Well, anyway. So I either 'play out' conversations in my head, or it's just me talking to myself. But no other voices than me.

 

[quietgirl]

I do it all the time. Sometimes to the point that I forget I haven't talked to the actual person and, especially in cases of emails, etc, forget that I still owe them a reply.

Same here. I think this is where my "forgetting" to call people back stems from as well.

I work through all of my problems by talking them out to myself w/ "someone else". I always thought I was odd! I write letters too. There's a folder in my computer filled with unsent letters I have written to various people in my life.

 

[wedekit]

You should hear my internal monologue when driving:

"Omg, omg... Ah! Sharp right turn, quick! Not going to make it, not going to make it... going to die... AHHHHH! Alright, I'm here. Oh! I'm ten minutes early too. <3"

I'm a nervous driver. O_O

 

[janey_girl]

OMG - do this too much, thought it was just because I was a total nut job....

I will have total arguments in my head and by the time the conversation actually comes up it is never nearly as "exciting" as played out in my head!

 

[Journey]

I have been an utter bitch to my step son and step daughter-in-law today in my head. It will keep me from being one to their face if I have enough time to get it out of my system before I actually lay eyes on them. They deserve to get it from me, but I want to be more mature than to give it to them bombastically.

 

[APenguin]

I'm not crazy!

Yay!

 

[the state i am in]

if you actually have individual characters, i think your overall ability to produce cognitively sound and extremely complex judgments would be quite enhanced. modularity or some such thing.

i can dialogue with someone in my head, but then like in real life it's usually just to impress them and get my homework hung on the fridge with gold stars and smiley faces and standing ovations not just in the seventh inning stretch.

 

[PuddleRiver]

Sometimes, I'll actually think I said stuff out loud, then wonder why they don't respond.

 

[hokie912]

I definitely rehearse conversations with people in my head, imagining the different response scenarios. Sometimes I know that I never actually intend to have whatever conversation it is, but if I end up on a positive scenario, it makes me feel better. For example, if I'm angry with someone I can usually diffuse my temper by thinking about what I would say to him or her in no uncertain terms and what he'd say in return....while simultaneously talking myself out of the direct confrontation by realizing the other conversation scenarios. I'll typically still express my frustration with the person, just less directly. But having "had" the experience of saying what I really wanted to say, I'm less angry when it comes down to it.

I don't typically take it so far as to think that I've really had whatever dialogue I imagined in my head, but I can see how that could happen. As to the rehearsal inner dialogue, I'm with others who didn't think that was a type-specific thing.

 

[Bethedee]

I am so glad I'm not the only one I rehearse conversations with people in my head. I also have the mental characters that I talk to. Now that I'm trying to think of them, though, for some reason they're hard to remember. There's one dominant voice I argue with though.

 

[cathryn]

i rarely have actual dialogue unless im really upset and doing the 'just dont say anything' thing,
i do flip through scenarios, reactions from people; most of it happens more internally then in full awareness.
more recently ive had a few really vivid daydreams where it felt like that person was actually there really startled me the first time it occurred.

 

[Eagle]

Mmm hmm. And this is why we would do better with a question like this by asking (among other things) for non-Ni people to validate having the same experience(s) that is being presupposed by some to be "Ni" related.

Interesting... Mind if I validate? I'm sure we would get different responses from different people on this. What's interesting is that we are going from Ni Dominant to Ni being the least of all the functions. At least in my case..

While I don't actually talk to people in my head, I do talk to myself. A lot. It's like a quorum of me's in my head.
I can and do imagine all the possibilities a conversation can take, but visualizing the person saying them doesn't happen very much. Only when I'm VERY mad at something very specific having to do with confronting a person. Otherwise I don't see it. So, all in all I accomplish the same thing by counting all the possibilities without letting my almost nonexistent imagination get the best of me. It's what I get for being an ISTJ...

The peoples' responses I most relate to, I think, is prplchxxx (whatever your user name is.. ;-).

I guess I don't really think about 'how' I think, even though I do spend most of my time in my head, thinking about stuff. But it's always my own voice, as I'm thinking over things, or mulling over problems- no third parties, or 'outside' voices, or alter-personas..I can't really relate to that piece. It's always just me and my thoughts.

Same for me.

I do often do what prplcxxx does, though, where I'll play out different scenarios/conversations, and all of the possible responses/outcomes, and how I'll then in turn react to all of the possibilities..but I guess I assumed everyone did this. Often I'll get so wrapped up in doing this that it'll be like I'm there -- like I'm actually 'seeing' the things unfold in my mind, so I become unaware of my immediate surroundings. Well....like dreaming, or like when you're reading a book and you're just 'there', watching the story unfold as you're reading it.

I know the feeling. When I visualize conversations and possibilities it doesn't occur.

Well, anyway. So I either 'play out' conversations in my head, or it's just me talking to myself. But no other voices than me.

So, there are my current thoughts on the matter. If I experience a different mental state I'll let you all know.