[MBTI General] INFJ Compatibility - Why the INFJ/ENTP dynamic is hands down the best.

[the state i am in]

[MENTION=6275]the state i am in[/MENTION] (I love your avatar! I saw them last year in Indianapolis and it was one of the best nights of my life!!)

yeah, while i still love nmh, i do enjoy the way this assortment of titles has evolved over many years of forum-ing. i've got the original moment, the belle & sebastian song playing in the subway station as the windows into other worlds roll by, morphing into in the aeroplane over the sea (looking for my holland 1945/ghost existential truth/peace w the world moment), leading into some beefheart zig zag wandering and a leonard cohen spiritual sexual prayer. good work, me! my end credits only movie scenes abound, one after another!

- I agree with you that the challenges are great, but the reward is more complete understanding. I would go two steps further: to learn someone who excels at your weaknesses helps you grow, and can balance you out as a person.

agreed 100%. the best part is simply that, in the right circumstances, it seems to offer not a promise but a CHANCE at those two competing relationship balances: the self and the life, that both sides of that slinky oscillating between inside and out, can grow in their right directions together. the building up of more internal potentials while developing real plans in the world.

For example, whenever I take the personality test, I often get like 100% Ni. As in, my S is practically not there at all!! Not good! I am incredibly grateful to people who can bring me back down to earth.

if yer entps are bringing you back to the ground, might i suggest finding new ones? to me, entp fun is like playing american gladiators thru the wormholes connecting outer space. with hilariously dated scenes and a kind of absurd humor at the constructs defining the worlds/games of man. holy shit! is that BLAZE?!?!

on the other hand, they do have that gene hackman on the bus at the end of royal tenenbaums feeling, of getting out on the road, exploring, and, like e7s in general, appreciating that holy expanse whose enoughness need not be doubted. the world is interesting! enough to experience/not just have ideas of! and that there's always more!

Although feeling types make awesome friends, in my INFJ idealism I usually find myself choosing partners who inspire me with their insightful problem-solving abilities. In a way, Ti inspires my Fe more than Fi would... it seems more active and even more idealistically pure to me (not sure if I'm making sense). And I often prefer a Ti type to a Fe type, because if I really want to save the world, I'm gonna need some new skills My Fe is all about choosing to help people over personal comfort, right? I usually prefer to be stretched and inspired rather than to be perfectly comfortable (then I run to my study to hide and recharge, of course).

to me, Ti is just more immediately useful. and that's not bc it's necessarily better, but bc it is a kind of DISTILLED usefulness, mixed with being exactly the right tool for shaping my inherent cogitations and learnings into whatever the fuck the next version of itself it needs to become is.

Fi, on the other hand, challenges me to undo myself in a different way. it takes way more work. i have to get out the translator when communicating. buuuuuuuuuuut. it does lead to the depth of feeling, to the depth of empathy, to the depth of the truth of the heart in a way that is also maybe the best thing there is. needs, grace, healing, love, peace, beauty, authenticity, etc. i also do at times adore the way joy shows thru Fi in a more unadultered, less magazine cover-y way than us Fe folks.

 

[Dyslexxie]

What are you implying...?

NOTHING. A lot of girls go to the bathroom in groups. It's weird but it's common, especially with younger girls.

 

[1487610420]

why isn't this thread closed and stickied is beyond me

 

[the state i am in]

I wasn't exactly covert, plus I'm an ENTP so my motives should always be just a little suspect

yeah, in all honesty, i'm not getting quite the same gamesmanship as i usually get with the myriad of entps i know. from one bro to another, step it up. the signature kind of makes you sound like a 17 year old.

a buddhist might also follow some of that karmic inheritance expressing itself right there into oneself and see what kind of energy is being perpetuated there. any ego? clear seeing, or no? in the light of awareness and mutual interdependence, is misanthropy truly just about how we feel about others, or ourselves too?

to me, one of the deepest joys of the Ni/Ne dynamic, is not needing to only be half/a fragment of a person any more. to kind of reclaim the space for creative selfhood encompassing ALL of our potentials. choice becomes a beautiful thing.

... but from my experience, it's like watching paint dry. Which is totally respectable and I appreciate that, but there's a point where I can't handle it anymore (that's on me, not on the other person). There's only so long that you can keep opening yourself up and waiting, waiting, waiting, before you say fuck it, I'm done and it's too late.

agreed 100%. speaking only for me, i know that my capacity to trust, mixed with my intense trust needs (pretty far on one end of the extreme), are a real obstacle in all relationships. at bottom, however, there's something there that's more than communication. it's a kind of truth that is either there or isn't. for me, i know i will always follow the pursuit of that in a way that is equally self-driven as any entps intended destinations.

That being said, I don't care about type that much because any of them can work together with enough willingness and dedication.

agreed, again. the quality of the interaction is what is real.

with that said, i think for me and i assume for other ijs, there is a sense to look all the way towards the end. that there is a responsibility there to choose on behalf of not only the work but the potential. i actually have a great deal of conflict, at times, between most choices bc i feel such a heavy responsibility towards all the possibilities and at times get caught in a very silly trap of spending ALL my time in searching for bestness rather than betterness. here, i think, is one thing i appreciate with enps in general so much, that ability to kind of illuminate the way thru nowness that helps me find a better balance with these things. i know that, as far as my kind of inner circle goes, the ability to completely connect with me in this way and truly unleash the rest of the picture, in such seemingly incongruous, insubstantial moments, is my favorite aspect and what i best know how to make use of at this point.

how priority is given is just so different. the commitment to paths of intended outcomes rather than ways of being and the underlying needs that constitute them, to me, makes getting a deeper sense of relationship steadiness difficult to find. having dated an entp vs say an intj, it was weird bc the whole way of relating to one's own principles is just, sometimes, given to the group. it's confusing as hell, altho it does force me to confront some things within myself (eg here is how a person might choose to use Fe driven more by strategy than presumed morality/any kind of more aesthetically driven, ecological beauty sense). and also, here is how strategy can correct the problems of morality/aesthetic sense in ways that are actually more important, given the here and now. it really does go both ways.

one other thing i would add is that for me, while it's of a different kind, i get as restless w a process that is not speaking to me as anyone i know. give and take is challenging, especially when missions are at stake.

Just kidding, but yeah I think we warm up to people incredibly fast if we choose to. If I like someone, I've been told I pull them in like we've been friends for eternity, and non-ENTPs are always surprised by my ability to do that. It's probably part of our ENTP thing - we're either all in, or not at all.

to me, some of this is just sx intensity. the other is just that entps/e7s are good at focusing on the positive, at times avoiding the full truth, both with themselves and with others. entp's always there subtext: c'mon! click like!

Take it as a compliment that it's happening to you.

now THIS is entp. classic. selling confidence one buyer at a time (... until the plans for the factory go thru and the investors are lined up).

 

[Forever]

NOTHING. A lot of girls go to the bathroom in groups. It's weird but it's common, especially with younger girls.

If you think about it, it's probably super unsanitary lol. This is just to my imagination though, the worst fights could happen in women's bathrooms where the public eye doesn't see. It doesn't have to be physical, it may be verbal.

Oh Dyslexxie, you stimulate my imagination.

... lol. Now INTERPRET THAT.

Actually while it may imply a double meaning in possibly a lewd way, I didn't mean it that way. It's pretty much you help me build off on ideas.

 

[Dyslexxie]

agreed, again. the quality of the interaction is what is real.

with that said, i think for me and i assume for other ijs, there is a sense to look all the way towards the end. that there is a responsibility there to choose on behalf of not only the work but the potential. i actually have a great deal of conflict, at times, between most choices bc i feel such a heavy responsibility towards all the possibilities and at times get caught in a very silly trap of spending ALL my time in searching for bestness rather than betterness. here, i think, is one thing i appreciate with enps in general so much, that ability to kind of illuminate the way thru nowness that helps me find a better balance with these things. i know that, as far as my kind of inner circle goes, the ability to completely connect with me in this way and truly unleash the rest of the picture, in such seemingly incongruous, insubstantial moments, is my favorite aspect and what i best know how to make use of at this point.

how priority is given is just so different. the commitment to paths of intended outcomes rather than ways of being and the underlying needs that constitute them, to me, makes getting a deeper sense of relationship steadiness difficult to find. having dated an entp vs say an intj, it was weird bc the whole way of relating to one's own principles is just, sometimes, given to the group. it's confusing as hell, altho it does force me to confront some things within myself (eg here is how a person might choose to use Fe driven more by strategy than presumed morality/any kind of more aesthetically driven, ecological beauty sense). and also, here is how strategy can correct the problems of morality/aesthetic sense in ways that are actually more important, given the here and now. it really does go both ways.

one other thing i would add is that for me, while it's of a different kind, i get as restless w a process that is not speaking to me as anyone i know. give and take is challenging, especially when missions are at stake.

Maybe that's what it is...you guys are well thought out while we're impulsive. The problem with it of course is that we get really damn excited, everything is gravy, aaaaaaaaand...INTJs can't respond fast enough because they're caught up processing. Which is fantastic for mellowing us out, but platonically.

to me, some of this is just sx intensity. the other is just that entps/e7s are good at focusing on the positive, at times avoiding the full truth, both with themselves and with others. entp's always there subtext: c'mon! click like!

Quite possibly true.
"Sexual instinct can be called the instinct of attraction. It’s aggressive, competitive, single-minded, "all-or-nothing". Use of this energy is intensely fiery and affirmative, go-get-it approach, a life-and-death matter e.g. salmon swimming upstream to mate and die. With this instincts you are either turned on or you're not - it is what it is; you cannot fight mother nature. With this instinct one's attention is wholly captivated energetically by someone or something."

now THIS is entp. classic. selling confidence one buyer at a time (... until the plans for the factory go thru and the investors are lined up).

HAH way to call me out. I agree though, sometimes we're quite intense with no real basis.

If you think about it, it's probably super unsanitary lol. This is just to my imagination though, the worst fights could happen in women's bathrooms where the public eye doesn't see. It doesn't have to be physical, it may be verbal.

Oh Dyslexxie, you stimulate my imagination.

... lol. Now INTERPRET THAT.

Nope, you can't hide it, I know what you meant. You're thinking this is the equivalent of "what happens at sleepovers?" Boys! So silly!

 

[Forever]

Nope, you can't hide it, I know what you meant. You're thinking this is the equivalent of "what happens at sleepovers?" Boys! So silly!

*Puts the so called "mask" on* You don't know me.

Illuminati knows.

Watch out, especially you part of the NTP subfamily should know this very well.

#stereotypingatbest

 

[Litsnob]

I don't understand this opposites attract mentality. I am an introvert attracted to introverts, though admittedly I can behave like an extrovert for short periods of time and I like really shy guys. The thought of being partnered with an extrovert exhausts me and I would fear incompatibility in the form of he wants to go out and I want to stay home, he wants to invite ten people over and I don't.

 

[keshvi]

I'd say this is pretty accurate, though there is always a certain variation in every mbti type, I've always connected a lot more with entps than any other type. (I'm an infj) I do think infjs can be very extroverted, but only around people they are familiar/comfortable with. An infjs extroversion really depends on who they are talking to and what they are talking about. However like I said, there is always a variation in each type. Not every infj is the same, therefore I cannot speak for all infjs. I also 100% agree that infjs are the least orderly j, as I've taken the test multiple times and got infp a lot. I think infjs mature quickly, though at the same time, I do argue that infjs stay children at heart for a long time. Infjs are idealists and dreamers, they create and live in their own little world. Growing up, I've found it hard to balance my inner world with my reality. I think infjs hold on to this inner world because it is a place where they can stay a kid, where they can hold on to their innocence. I do very much agree though that entps are by far the slowest to mature.


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[WRiStBanDs21]

The downside for the INFJ maturing so quickly is because you already feel so different and alone (the ENTP does as well but being the extrovert with an over sized ego they haven't noticed it yet and is enjoying still thinking they're better than everybody else) you also don't feel like you fit in with other people your age so by the time the ENTP has matured the INFJ is feeling jaded, frustrated and starting to let go of that ideal picture of love they've always had and can find in the ENTP.

Wow, I just started hanging with this INFJ a lot recently, not even enough to even have enough material to begin deciphering our interactions... But just about every sentence in here was so true! The biggest conclusion I came to was ... I need to grow up, and FAST!!