[INTJ] Hate an INTJ? Tell us why!

[Amargith]

I like most of them, but there is one I hate about them.

They like to be blunt and critical, but they can't take it. They need sympathy and understanding, but they can't give it. They're like babies. Very practical, organized, serious-minded, calculating babies.

Actually, most of em can and will do those things just fine, but you have to 'earn' it with them or they just pretty much dismiss you or consider you not worth the effort automatically.

I personally roll my eyes at that attitude

 

[Athenian200]

Actually, most of em can do those things just fine, but you have to 'earn' it with them or they just pretty much dismiss you automatically.

I personally roll my eyes at that attitude

Yeah, but the prize for earning it is dubious... in the case of an INFJ, earning it means you get stuck dealing with all the INTJs issues, and having them expect you to be there for them 24/7.

On the other hand, you do get something pretty awesome in return... they'll literally suck you into their inner world, and it tends to feel like the mental/emotional equivalent of being immersed totally in warm water while still able to breathe, while being hugged very, very tightly at the same time. I don't know if most people would consider that a positive feeling, but I would.

 

[Amargith]

Yeah, but the prize for earning it is dubious... in the case of an INFJ, earning it means you get stuck dealing with all the INTJs issues, and having them expect you to be there for them 24/7.

On the other hand, you do get something pretty awesome in return... they'll literally suck you into their inner world, and it tends to feel like the mental/emotional equivalent of being immersed totally in warm water while still able to breathe, while being hugged very, very tightly at the same time. I don't know if most people would consider that a positive feeling, but I would.

Hehe, well the thing is, (as far as I can see), you gotto activate their Fi...which costs effort for them to use, meaning you better be worth it. Only Fi will prompt the response of 'hang on, he might be on to something', especially if the bluntness and comments are geared towards their person and competence, instead of outwards tasks, and only Fi will wanna treat you with sympathy.

Personally, I think you're putting too much into it with them, but that might be Fe for ya. When they respond like that, I just smile and move on, on occasion bugging them, with a jab or a riddle and what not. Some will be intrigued enough to open up. Others will pass. That's fine. None of them ever expected me to be there 24/7. All of them know though that if they really need me, I'm there. And yes, their inner world is utterly amazing. It's a real treat to be a part of that

 

[Kalach]

INFJ blunt and critical is personal and has fuck all to do with achievement of impersonal goals, so not only does it sting, but it is recognisable as a genuine roadblock. Getting you guys to cooperate is an excercise in wishing powerlessness upon oneself. And somehow or other, you guys get away with that crap, probably because we recognise your authority, or perhaps just because everything stalls long enough for hopelessness to set in.

I'd hate on the INFJs in the proper thread but I don't want to be made to cry.

 

[Amargith]

LOL, I hear ya

I imagine it being worse for a fellow J though

 

[Athenian200]

INFJ blunt and critical is personal and has fuck all to do with achievement of impersonal goals, so not only does it sting, but it is recognisable as a genuine roadblock. Getting you guys to cooperate is an excercise in wishing powerlessness upon oneself. And somehow or other, you guys get away with that crap, probably because we recognise your authority, or perhaps just because everything stalls long enough for hopelessness to set in.

I'd hate on the INFJs in the proper thread but I don't want to be made to cry.

At least you know your place.

 

[Jaguar]

They like to be blunt and critical, but they can't take it. They need sympathy and understanding, but they can't give it. They're like babies. Very practical, organized, serious-minded, calculating babies.

You mean like this baby?

My attitude is that as long as I don't hurt anyone else and mind my own business, I'm doing my part. So just back off, everyone, okay? I've had enough dreary moralizing for one day. I contribute to charities when I can, and I want to get a job, work for my money, and support myself, not be a drain on anyone. That's all I've ever wanted. I'll have you know I am a respectible citizen that strives to contribute reasonably, even if I'm not perfect.

So... four words. Get. Off. My. Case.

Halla got up your ass for being apathetic and you fell to pieces.
I can actually hear the whine in your post. Or was that a wimper?

 

[Matthew_Z]

The reasons for my feelings of negativity against one or more INTJs I know are not type-specific.

 

[Curious1]

I have known three INTJs and all three werent particularly funny and were usually quite serious. I dont understand why INTJs are thought of as funny? Am I meeting the wrong INTJs?

I have no idea honestly lol. It could be that only some types get each others humor or think another type is funny. Alternatively, humor may have not much to do with type or only slightly to do with. I have two INTJ guys that I'm close with and one is hilarious but only to people he lets close to him. Others think he's a total ass. My husband is not that funny/witty but he suffers with depression so I am sure that dampers it )

 

[sgtmac_46]

I like most of them, but there is one I hate about them.

They like to be blunt and critical, but they can't take it. They need sympathy and understanding, but they can't give it. They're like babies. Very practical, organized, serious-minded, calculating babies.

Oh my god, you dinged that bell HARD AND ACCURATE!

 

[Athenian200]

You mean like this baby?



Halla got up your ass for being apathetic and you fell to pieces.
I can actually hear the whine in your post. Or was that a wimper?

Not precisely. INTJs fall to pieces for other reasons, but I bet it's very similar to that, yes.

I'm probably babyish in terms of striving to help other people, but only on my own terms, and in a global sense. I get apathetic and dismissive when anyone expects me to actually get my hands dirty, yet I probably need that kind of practical help more than anyone. Hmm...

I still maintain that he was out of line in demanding that I put myself in the way of harm to help another person. I may or may not decide to risk helping them, but no one has the right to demand it of me. Let's consider the subject closed. I put that thread on ignore for a reason.

 

[Edgar]

I'm probably babyish in terms of striving to help other people, but only on my own terms, and in a global sense.

Lol, you'd make a great member of the Communist Party... "we're helping people, not individuals"

 

[poppy]

On the other hand, you do get something pretty awesome in return... they'll literally suck you into their inner world, and it tends to feel like the mental/emotional equivalent of being immersed totally in warm water while still able to breathe, while being hugged very, very tightly at the same time. I don't know if most people would consider that a positive feeling, but I would.

Interesting...being emotionally close to an INTJ is sort of similar to drowning in bath water...or maybe waterboarding?

In the best way possible!

 

[Kalach]

I like most of them, but there is one I hate about them.

They like to be blunt and critical, but they can't take it. They need sympathy and understanding, but they can't give it. They're like babies. Very practical, organized, serious-minded, calculating babies.

Oh my god, you dinged that bell HARD AND ACCURATE!

Good luck with that. The best that can be said when Fe takes someone down is, "Wasn't me, he did it to himself." You people and your needs, sick you make me, sick! Scoundrels and suck-ups you are. And you blame everyone else for it.

Bah.

 

[Gothmawg]

I'm hysterically funny. I mean literally. I not only think I'm funny, but other people do too. I will acknowledge that if you have fuzzy feelings that can be easily hurt, that you are unlikely to find my humor, er...humorous.

If you're a cop, a doctor, a soldier, or you grew up on the streets, you're likely to find my wit...er, witty. Otherwise, you'll think I'm vicious and cruel.

All MY friends laugh at my jokes. Of course, they could be too afraid not to.

I fit 3 out of 4, which is probably why I find you hilarious. But then again, I've made you snort more than once or twice as well

 

[Athenian200]

Interesting...being emotionally close to an INTJ is sort of similar to drowning in bath water...or maybe waterboarding?

In the best way possible!

Hehe. Yes, drowning in bath water. Or returning to the womb, I guess.

You know, at first I thought you meant surfboarding or waterskiing, but I looked it up and it's actually a form of torture. Yikes! Yeah, it can be like THAT, too, if negative emotions come into play.

One thing I think it's safe to say, though, is that INTJs are NOT INTPs. They're a lot more intense. INTPs can be warm, but not that intense. I think it's the J that makes them more intense, due to the focused tendencies. Focus and goals imply passion, especially in Introverts.

 

[Amargith]

You'd be wrong about INTPs. I actually find that INTJs are..more predictably warm and safe once you've bypassed Te. Don't get me wrong, they can be fiercly intense..but in a fun, familiar way. INTPs on the other hand kinda have that hot-cold sleeping volcano thing going for them. Never know when it's going to burst...So I wonder...is that just a Fi vs Fe thing again?

 

[the state i am in]

INFJ blunt and critical is personal and has fuck all to do with achievement of impersonal goals, so not only does it sting, but it is recognisable as a genuine roadblock. Getting you guys to cooperate is an excercise in wishing powerlessness upon oneself. And somehow or other, you guys get away with that crap, probably because we recognise your authority, or perhaps just because everything stalls long enough for hopelessness to set in.

I'd hate on the INFJs in the proper thread but I don't want to be made to cry.

i do have the ability to outcrass my intj and to be far more cutting. it's like a synthesis between an enfj and an intp, but with the intjs same Ni underlying meaning engine. get me in a closed game and i'll kill you 5 times before you hit the ground. my intj knows how to achieve an objective, but i know how to achieve an emotional objective. it's the difference between murdering self-efficacy vs murdering self-image. intjs are better at defending themselves tho so they can get away with acting like bigger pricks. when infjs go mean they're just empty suicide bombers and lazy like nihilists.

also i find intj and infj to have very similar humor/penchant for absurdity. taking an image and watching all the little Ni hands like shovels punching it in the kidneys. but with the speed of a coked out intp working on a rubix cube (with a misguided/sublimated sexual drive).

intjs and entps are by far the funniest types. entjs next. and then boarding all other in e5s in rows 20 and above.

 

[poppy]

Hehe. Yes, drowning in bath water. Or returning to the womb, I guess.

You know, at first I thought you meant surfboarding or waterskiing, but I looked it up and it's actually a form of torture. Yikes! Yeah, it can be like THAT, too, if negative emotions come into play.

One thing I think it's safe to say, though, is that INTJs are NOT INTPs. They're a lot more intense. INTPs can be warm, but not that intense. I think it's the J that makes them more intense, due to the focused tendencies. Focus and goals imply passion, especially in Introverts.

You'd be wrong about INTPs. I actually find that INTJs are..more predictably warm and safe once you've bypassed Te. Don't get me wrong, they can be fiercly intense..but in a fun, familiar way. INTPs on the other hand kinda have that hot-cold sleeping volcano thing going for them. Never know when it's going to burst...So I wonder...is that just a Fi vs Fe thing again?

It does sound like Fi vs Fe...I think INTJ Fi is pretty soft and squishy and safe once you get past the intense IXXJ-ness that Athenian described.

also i find intj and infj to have very similar humor/penchant for absurdity. taking an image and watching all the little Ni hands like shovels punching it in the kidneys. but with the speed of a coked out intp working on a rubix cube (with a misguided/sublimated sexual drive).

I love this.

 

[MonkeyGrass]

You'd be wrong about INTPs. I actually find that INTJs are..more predictably warm and safe once you've bypassed Te. Don't get me wrong, they can be fiercly intense..but in a fun, familiar way. INTPs on the other hand kinda have that hot-cold sleeping volcano thing going for them. Never know when it's going to burst...So I wonder...is that just a Fi vs Fe thing again?

I've found that to be true, as well. Once you figure them out, they can be very emotionally predictable and comfortable, growing and morphing at a slow enough pace to easily adjust to. They get off balance once in a while and shoot daggers, but once you learn when to duck, it's smooth sailing.