Fi users and not apologizing

[citizen cane]

I only apologize if I know I'm in the wrong. Apologizing otherwise is stupid and counterproductive.

 

[Lady_X]

I think with me, once I open up, that's it. There's really nothing more past that other than knowledge and what I'm thinking. My surface behavior is completely completely different from my underlying behavior. For example, my ENFJ 3 best friend over here is awesome, and sometimes I catch myself following him around like a puppy every so often. I actually have to remind myself not to do that. Around him I'm really quiet and calm. When I'm away from him or a girlfriend, I often change back to... how I sorta feel right now. Neurotic and all over the place.

By the description you just gave it seems like that's exactly what she's thinking. I guess I'll ask her if I owe her an explanation.

nice.

i find you more palatable after these two posts. good for you. talk to the girl. don't expect her to know how it made you feel.

 

[chickpea]

Also marm is an E6. Every Fi valuing E6 thinks I'm unstable and dangerous despite the fact that I've never gone to prison or charged with any offenses other than 4 minor traffic violations. These are shallow words from shallow people.

There are plenty of people in prison more stable and saner than you.

 

[Azure Flame]

>implying that unstable and dangerous people always go to prison and get charged with offenses

hmm... lol...

Yeah I guess this conversation just confirms it. I'm the forum's closet rapist.

 

[Azure Flame]

Can we delete this thread?

The intent was to learn how Fi users communicate and figure out what's going on in their head. The outcome was that I have a dozen or so people reactive people telling me I'm a psychopath and a child.

 

[Lady_X]

i don't know how old ya are but imma school ya a bit on life

you see it's not ever going to be your way or nothing.

you don't get to just cut people out or hit delete. you have to take responsibility for your part in every single thing that goes wrong in your life. a misscommunication with a friend or 19 pages of forum people. you are responsible for how people see you.

you are responsible for not communicating effectively.

adult people really ought not to slam doors or throw tantrums.

 

[Azure Flame]

i don't know how old ya are but imma school ya a bit on life

you see it's not ever going to be your way or nothing.

you don't get to just cut people out or hit delete. you have to take responsibility for your part in every single thing that goes wrong in your life. a misscommunication with a friend or 19 pages of forum people. you are responsible for how people see you.

you are responsible for not communicating effectively.

Noted.

adult people really ought not to slam doors or throw tantrums.

I'm unaware I threw a tantrum.

define "adult"

 

[Lady_X]

come on you don't need me to "define" adult. what's the point of that.

and yes your breaking her phone = tantrum
your yelling at pregnant lady = tantrum
your giving someone the silent treatment for hurt feelings that were never expressed = tantrum

 

[chickpea]

Who is paying you to coach their lives for them?

 

[Azure Flame]

come on you don't need me to "define" adult. what's the point of that.

and yes your breaking her phone = tantrum
your yelling at pregnant lady = tantrum
your giving someone the silent treatment for hurt feelings that were never expressed = tantrum

Define adult. Your definition is going to be much different from mine I promise.

Here, if it helps, I'll give you my definition. But I expect to hear yours in return.

Adult = Someone who takes responsibility over their own life.

 

[Lady_X]

Define adult. Your definition is going to be much different from mine I promise.

you're missing the point. i don't give a shit what your definition is.

are you trying to say that due to our differing definitions you are allowed to behave like a child?

 

[Azure Flame]

Who is paying you to coach their lives for them?

People who value my solutions to problems they themselves cannot fix.

 

[Azure Flame]

you're missing the point. i don't give a shit what your definition is.

are you trying to say that due to our differing definitions you are allowed to behave like a child?

If your definition of adult is "button up, tucked in shirt, doesn't express emotions in public all in the name of looking 'professional'"

then I am going to ignore your definition of an adult because our values are different and incompatible.

 

[Azure Flame]

There is certain advice I am INCAPABLE of taking.

Worrying about my appearance is impossible and causes me to become neurotic. I tried for 5 years when I was in the military. it. is. impossible. I am who I am. Those who don't like it get door slammed. Those who do, do not.

 

[Lady_X]

If your definition of adult is "button up, tucked in shirt, doesn't express emotions in public all in the name of looking 'professional'"

then I am going to ignore your definition of an adult because our values are different and incompatible.

i'm a fucking enfp do you actually think that's my definition? haha

 

[Azure Flame]

i'm a fucking enfp do you actually think that's my definition? haha

I will continue to think that's what your definition of adult is until you correct my understanding. Your understanding is too subjective and now you're being difficult.

 

[Nicodemus]

 

[Azure Flame]

Yeah see I don't have these arguments in real life, and my friends love me. So as far as I can tell you guys don't understand.

Its been said I'm bad at getting my point across sometimes. Considering there are people, even on this forum, who know exactly what my point is without the condescension, I'm inclined to believe it is ya'lls responsibility to ask questions for understanding instead of make impulsive judgements.

 

[Azure Flame]

Or I can just continue filling my ignore list with the people who would rather believe they know everything instead of practice their listening skills.

 

[Lady_X]

I will continue to think that's what your definition of adult is until you correct my understanding.

wow...okay why the misdirection? it is so not important.

children do not have the intellectual or emotional maturity to express themselves through language. they do not have the capacity for self reflection or empathy. they do not have the life experience to grasp the intricacy of interpersonal relationships.

adult brains should have matured to the point that they are capable of communicating their needs effectively without resorting to childish acts out of frustration.

we can all be childish and imperfect communicators...and as adults we ought to realize that and aim to fix it.

that's all. adults take responsibility for their part and try to communicate to the best of their ability to resolve it....that's it..that's what i mean. you don't cut people out...you communicate.