Nijntje
Warflower
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2009
- Messages
- 3,130
- MBTI Type
- CRZY
- Enneagram
- 4w5
...but it's better if you don't.
Heating is getting installed today. F*CKING HELLS YEAH!!! I’ve been living in this 1890’s cottage for about 2 years now without heating, and I can tell you it gets mighty cold in winter. So I’m thankful that my owner decided I was a reliable enough tenant to actually warrant installing some kind of heating/cooling for me.
(How long you been asleep at the wheel? Out of control gathering up a speed. Your heart is on the dashboard, head in the street. I hope you wake up in time to scream..)
The thing I didn’t count on was all the freaking workmen; I have two installing the actual split system and another two installing a power system for the thing to run off as it needs it’s own power supply apparently. The problem with this is that the only manhole in my house is in my room and I am currently sick in bed, in my room…. Also because I am sick and haven’t been bothered tidying I currently have a “floordrobe†in my room. For the unenlightened a floodrobe is essentially when every article of clothing you own is on the floor.
(Waste me for tails or for heads. Your attitude is mud and your promises dead. You counteract the fuel with the drink and the drugs. It’s not what you did it’s what you will do…)
So I am currently sick in bed, with a ladder in my room leading to the tiny, tiny manhole in the corner of my bedroom, my kitten freaking out somewhere my other cat has abandoned me for other people… I found this out on Saturday night from some newly me neighbours that although Vlad hisses and growls at me, he is his same loving schmoopy self with other people. I can’t even begin to explain how awfully distressing this is to me.
(So take another turn on the merry go round. Your numbers all come up now you’re king of the town, So buckle up and chase yourself a new thrill, it’s never going to be like before..)
So pretty much I’ve lost my first-born furry child. And to people who don’t even love him as much as I do dammit!! The crazy cat lady in me just sees this as an excuse to get another kitten and give it all my love, and make it LOVE ME!!!!
(You keep coming back for me. To find me almost knocking n your door. Say man you’re the saddest thing I know. You got to coast man begging for the score. You lose it all and you stumble to the floor, say man you are the saddest thing I know)
So maybe tomorrow I’ll go kitten shopping. I’m manic and I know it but at the moment I don’t care, I prefer it to the depression, I know all of this is just a diversionary tactic to get me to not pay attention to what’s realty bothering me, which is feeling down all the time. So you don’t take your pill and suddenly buying a million kittens seems like a good idea. A great idea even. Yup.
(You keep coming up for air. To find your own foot pushing on your head. Say man you are the saddest thing I know. )
I can rationalise it by saying that it will give Hansel someone to play with through the long days when I’m not at home, but then it almost seems like I’m giving up on Vlad if I do that, but perhaps I’m resigned to the fact that my cat hates me and it’s a natural reaction to just go “fuck it†and move on to the next thing rather than dwell?
(I see the dried old blood is in your hair. You got the old kaleidoscopic stare. Say man you are the saddest thing I know)
So how do I jump from floordrobes to tradesmen installing airconditioning to my cat hating me to kittens and sickness all in one post without so much as a really common thread? Tangents and the fact that my brain is currently skipping through thoughts and ideas like scratched cd that skips back and forth through a track with gleeful abandon. My mind is currently a vortex of mixed up ideas, half formed sentences and delusional thinking.
(When you going to finally admit. It’s the end of the line, you’ve been hammered and hit. Your body is a wreck and your mind is a mess. I know what you want, I think this is it…)
Sadly I think I like it this way.
Heating is getting installed today. F*CKING HELLS YEAH!!! I’ve been living in this 1890’s cottage for about 2 years now without heating, and I can tell you it gets mighty cold in winter. So I’m thankful that my owner decided I was a reliable enough tenant to actually warrant installing some kind of heating/cooling for me.
(How long you been asleep at the wheel? Out of control gathering up a speed. Your heart is on the dashboard, head in the street. I hope you wake up in time to scream..)
The thing I didn’t count on was all the freaking workmen; I have two installing the actual split system and another two installing a power system for the thing to run off as it needs it’s own power supply apparently. The problem with this is that the only manhole in my house is in my room and I am currently sick in bed, in my room…. Also because I am sick and haven’t been bothered tidying I currently have a “floordrobe†in my room. For the unenlightened a floodrobe is essentially when every article of clothing you own is on the floor.
(Waste me for tails or for heads. Your attitude is mud and your promises dead. You counteract the fuel with the drink and the drugs. It’s not what you did it’s what you will do…)
So I am currently sick in bed, with a ladder in my room leading to the tiny, tiny manhole in the corner of my bedroom, my kitten freaking out somewhere my other cat has abandoned me for other people… I found this out on Saturday night from some newly me neighbours that although Vlad hisses and growls at me, he is his same loving schmoopy self with other people. I can’t even begin to explain how awfully distressing this is to me.
(So take another turn on the merry go round. Your numbers all come up now you’re king of the town, So buckle up and chase yourself a new thrill, it’s never going to be like before..)
So pretty much I’ve lost my first-born furry child. And to people who don’t even love him as much as I do dammit!! The crazy cat lady in me just sees this as an excuse to get another kitten and give it all my love, and make it LOVE ME!!!!
(You keep coming back for me. To find me almost knocking n your door. Say man you’re the saddest thing I know. You got to coast man begging for the score. You lose it all and you stumble to the floor, say man you are the saddest thing I know)
So maybe tomorrow I’ll go kitten shopping. I’m manic and I know it but at the moment I don’t care, I prefer it to the depression, I know all of this is just a diversionary tactic to get me to not pay attention to what’s realty bothering me, which is feeling down all the time. So you don’t take your pill and suddenly buying a million kittens seems like a good idea. A great idea even. Yup.
(You keep coming up for air. To find your own foot pushing on your head. Say man you are the saddest thing I know. )
I can rationalise it by saying that it will give Hansel someone to play with through the long days when I’m not at home, but then it almost seems like I’m giving up on Vlad if I do that, but perhaps I’m resigned to the fact that my cat hates me and it’s a natural reaction to just go “fuck it†and move on to the next thing rather than dwell?
(I see the dried old blood is in your hair. You got the old kaleidoscopic stare. Say man you are the saddest thing I know)
So how do I jump from floordrobes to tradesmen installing airconditioning to my cat hating me to kittens and sickness all in one post without so much as a really common thread? Tangents and the fact that my brain is currently skipping through thoughts and ideas like scratched cd that skips back and forth through a track with gleeful abandon. My mind is currently a vortex of mixed up ideas, half formed sentences and delusional thinking.
(When you going to finally admit. It’s the end of the line, you’ve been hammered and hit. Your body is a wreck and your mind is a mess. I know what you want, I think this is it…)
Sadly I think I like it this way.
