[ENFP] Common ENFP issues

[CzeCze]

Hi, everyone- I'm new here. I really enjoy this thread, although I haven't read all of it yet.

A few questions:

1.) What strategies do you use to overcome the follow-through problem? I'm a dreamer and I just can't seem to make much tangible progress. I'm extremely hardworking on something that inspires me, but that isn't constant every day.

Flex your Te. Satisfying to do lists and deadlines. Do it now, now, now. Learn to push through boredom and tedium. Sometimes, medication helps.

2.) I know that most people say that ENFPs are the ones leading people on, but I find that I'm the one seeking more closeness than people seem willing enough to give me. I'm the one checking in with my friends and family and putting out more effort that way. I get disappointed and disenchanted with people often as a result. I have the feeling that they always let me down. Does anybody else have this experience?

Yes, I think thats fi desire for intimacy. I think it's something you learn through trial and error where to invest in and find. And then when you feel more secure because y have that connection yuou will find y have less of an urgency for it.

3.) I absolutely hate inauthenicity. When somebody flatters me (and seems to be buttering me up rather than being honest) or has a lovey-dovey gushy communication style it makes me want to puke. I have somebody like this in my immediate family (the family I married into) and it's really difficult to manage. I never want to respond to the icky gushy texts, etc. Anybody have this experience also?

1) Don't write off overt shows of emotion or sweetness as fake. Its funny how people read different things as real or fake depending on the language they understand. Guahinessnfrom acquaintances and strangers can make me embarrassed (though from friends it's appreciated ) but I understand everyone has their own way of doing things. I think fe and fi can cross wires often and get interpreted as fake or manipulative when the intent is not meant that way and the person is being authentic in their own way.

2) Play along mnowing that ybwont get sucked in. If its not your cup of tea just give minimal answers or respond as if the person were riting normal texts and speaking in a more monotone manner. Gushy people aren't necessarily asking you to also be gushy if you look at it that way you won't find it so invasive.

 

[Biancaaa]

Getting in trouble for analyzing anything an everything. :/

 

[Such Irony]

Getting in trouble for analyzing anything an everything. :/

That sounds like INTP

 

[Biancaaa]

That sounds like INTP

But I'm not an INTP x) I've tested as INTP in one of my classes before I knew I was an ENFP. Also, I recently asked my mom how many people it takes for something to be "normal" in society just because I was curious how numbers change people's opinion who like to fit in (which I don't)... And she said "Google it!" so yeah... Getting everyone to understand my thoughts is something like herding cats.

 

[31january]

i know what you mean, i seem to overrate the significance of things all the time and analyse them endlessly, while the rest of the world just moves on to other things...

 

[Skking1961]

I really see so much of me in this description. The other thing I do that is totally annoying to me and often to others is always assume I've done something wrong to cause problems in relationships. Then, I get in this insane , "trying to fix it" mode, which makes me feel like a crazy person, and the other person just gets irritated.

 

[IceBlock]

Getting in trouble for analyzing anything an everything. :/

If you mean in the way of analyzing every single word, action and reaction of other people with thousands of different possibilities, you are so incredibly right.
I see this as a huge strength of ENFPs, and other types with Ne dom too; because we naturally know what people really meant or want despite their words. But when our Fi aux comes in the way, it starts to get really ugly...

 

[Redbone]

What about seeing patterns in the behavior of others around you but being blind to them in self? It's strange but I'm my own blind spot.

 

[Amargith]

What about seeing patterns in the behavior of others around you but being blind to them in self? It's strange but I'm my own blind spot.

Actually, all types have that, but Ne makes you double paranoid about it, ime, as it is focused on reconning all angles

 

[WALMART]

Their brains are too sexy.

But I'm not an INTP x) I've tested as INTP in one of my classes before I knew I was an ENFP. Also, I recently asked my mom how many people it takes for something to be "normal" in society just because I was curious how numbers change people's opinion who like to fit in (which I don't)... And she said "Google it!" so yeah... Getting everyone to understand my thoughts is something like herding cats.

Only enfp's make cat herding analogies

 

[Amargith]

Their brains are too sexy.

Only enfp's make cat herding analogies

That is coz we're intimately familiar with the concept

Also, there aint no such thing as *too* sexy. Just saying.

 

[WALMART]

That is coz we're intimately familiar with the concept

Also, there aint no such thing as *too* sexy. Just saying.

There is when I can't get a hold of it

 

[Amargith]

There is when I can't get a hold of it

I believe competence and achievement are NT values. Surely you enjoy a good challenge

 

[skylights]

I believe competence and achievement are NT values.

So is whining, unfortunately

 

[Grublet]

Well, I'm definitely a socially retarded and flirtatious attention whore; at least it's accurate.

 

[georgie777]

this is all so accurate! I tend to get very caught up on helping one person (usually a new friend) and forget all about my other friends, does this happen to any of you?

 

[Isis]

Losing interest in something that I was completely orgasmic about a week ago.

Weirdoes and freaks falling in love with me.

Anxiety

 

[stalemate]

Losing interest in something that I was completely orgasmic about a week ago.

yep

 

[Betty Blue]

being accused of flirting...(when you clearly are not)

 

[pinkgraffiti]

YES

YES

YES

Losing interest in something that I was completely orgasmic about a week ago.

Weirdoes and freaks falling in love with me.

Anxiety