Bodylanguage and its purpose

[Virtual ghost]

To be honest I am not sure that I understand the bodylanguage thing.
Many times people said to me things about it, but this way of communication is more or less out of my reach.

The thing is that if someone says something to me I dont pay any atention to this. Which is because I am thinking about what that person said and looking at the context in which was said. Unless that person is doing something that is quite noticable.

I don't have any problems with picking persons mood but to tell you the truth I am not paying attention to this.

The thing is that I have to compare the data with my data base which is large and if I don't do it I will have nothing to say. Not to mention that I am obsessed with searching for holes.

On the other hand people said to me that I am walking enigma even when I am in social mode. This is probably because I am reserved and don't do things that could come in this category that much.



So
1.Why do you find bodylanguage important part of communication or why don't you find it important?

2.What frustrates you about deficit of bodylanguage in communication?

 

[Jack Flak]

Mix with people and pay attention to it. I highly doubt there's any academic way to illustrate it with which you'd come away with more than 25% the knowledge as with that.

 

[JocktheMotie]

Honestly I find body language to be a more genuine form of communication. If I'm out somewhere and approached, I'm trying to decipher as much as I can about the person and their intentions, and just trying to gather data. I am inherently skeptical about what people say, so I'll look at body language to determine the point/their motive in the conversation in the first place.

It's one of the reasons I hate talking over the phone. I think I'm missing out.

 

[Moiety]

Honestly I find body language to be a more genuine form of communication. If I'm out somewhere and approached, I'm trying to decipher as much as I can about the person and their intentions, and just trying to gather data. I am inherently skeptical about what people say, so I'll look at body language to determine the point/their motive in the conversation in the first place.

It's one of the reasons I hate talking over the phone. I think I'm missing out.

Ditto.

 

[ajblaise]

I actually think body language is pretty freakin easy to figure out if you're paying attention. But a lot of the time I'm not, and it doesn't register.

 

[Lady_X]

i think i trust body language almost more then someone's words because i think it's unintentional and more honest.

 

[ThatsWhatHeSaid]

Some body language is really easy to read, just by putting yourself in that person's shoes. So if a girl is unnecessarily touching you while talking to you, for example you know she wants you to rail her likes you. Or, if she keep looking away from you and isn't smiling, she's probably feeling awkward. Then there's the BS level of body language, imo, where crossed arms are a sign of defensiveness and open legs mean attraction. I don't really buy into that stuff as much.

 

[King sns]

So
1.Why do you find bodylanguage important part of communication or why don't you find it important? Body language is a very key part of communication. Most of the time it matches with what they are saying like,
"oh I am so excited too see the baby!!
But sometimes it doesn't match.
"oh I am so excited to see the baby.
Which one are you going to believe? I think its estimated that about (10%?) or so of communication is not in spoken word. You have to take tone, facial expression and some body language into consideration. I would agree with Edahn that there is some BS info. out there on body language. Crossing your arms or something like that could mean anything. You have to put everything into the context.

2.What frustrates you about deficit of bodylanguage in communication?
Its not common for people to show no body language or expression in communication, some people are less expressive with their body than others. That's a quirk that doesn't bother me much.
But when someone's body language is not matching up at all with what they are saying it really bugs me. I like everything to flow and match properly to feel that the conversation is going well, since I don't like to play guessing games about what people are trying to tell me purely through their body language if their words aren't matching up.

 

[Ardea]

1. Subtleties, and the impressions it gives people. Just because I'm not looking at you doesn't mean I'm lying.

2. Some sarcasm. It seems so literal at times. We should pop SARCASM HORNS out or something...

 

[ThatGirl]

I'm fascinated with body language. It can give quiet valuable information, but to really understand it, you have to take in a perspective twenty times larger than just the physical movement alone. I agree with Edahn, the crossed arms things and such that you would read in books really don't do the concept justice.

 

[placebo]

I think once you figure out how to read body language and manipulate your own body language, it becomes a huge advantage in how you communicate and come across to other people. It's like an art. Body language can be so subtle, but it can affect a person's perception of you on a more subconscious level. I think to be too unaware of other people's & your own body language is really a disadvantage, but I don't know enough about it to really explain it here.

 

[LostInNerSpace]

On the other hand people said to me that I am walking enigma even when I am in social mode. This is probably because I am reserved and don't do things that could come in this category that much.

That's what one of my high school teachers put on my report card. She also said she thought I was a bit thick--in front of the whole class (She didn't know I was in the class at the time).

1.Why do you find bodylanguage important part of communication or why don't you find it important?

2.What frustrates you about deficit of bodylanguage in communication?

Body language is mostly subconscious. Think about how you speak. Do you consciously control the vocal chords to make the sounds that come out of your mouth? Do you consciously process the words spoken by other people? No. In a similar way you speak body language and other people intercept it without either of you being consciously aware of it. Body language is processed by mirror neurons in the Amylgada part of the brain. This is quite a primitive instinctual part of the brain. You process this information with emotion vs. the cognitive processes in higher brain function.

 

[Lady_X]

that's why i trust it more...i think it's how i always know how people are feeling and why i'm so damn confused online w/o it.

 

[LostInNerSpace]

that's why i trust it more...i think it's how i always know how people are feeling and why i'm so damn confused online w/o it.

That's sounds very reasonable.

 

[Lady_X]

yeah...i'm a reasonable girl

 

[LostInNerSpace]

yeah...i'm a reasonable girl

Stop already!

 

[Lady_X]

oh no...haha

 

[LostInNerSpace]

oh no...haha

 

[Anja]

Then there's that intentional body language. You know. Like when you want to have a guest leave you may start emptying ash trays or glance at the clock. Some people seem oblivious to those social cues.

But not looking at someone while you are speaking and other rote sorts of interpretations can be misleading. Sometimes when people are lying they will stare intently into your eyes.

I watch for a nose touch. Often when people are lying they will at some point touch their noses. That's one clue. Sometimes it just means a itchy nose.

And it doesn't necessarily mean a lie is being told. It can also mean that the person is in conflict about what they are saying.

This can be especially amusing when watching politicians speak off the cuff.

 

[simpleamazement]

I see a lot of sources that say about 55% of communication is done through body language. Interrogators know a lot about this subject.