cascadeco, that sounds really sp to me. so types are able to dial in to the social reality much more effortlessly than us. i have an easy time exploring someone--i can break down their defenses, draw them out, see them very nakedly, and i can match their energy if i COMPLETELY believe in the situation and desire it, but as soon as that dissipates, as i become unsure, i have a tendency to retreat as well. at that point, i lose sense of what i want, what is true, what the interaction means to both parties and to others in a social context/shared reality. i want to get it together, collect and organize my thoughts and feelins, understand exactly what it is that i want and what is true, before i become fully open again, instead staying somewhat withdrawn and very private.
so types borrow their self-understandings from the world more naturally. the infj 4w5 so/sx girl i know has a really difficult time knowing where to draw lines, to stand firm and say that she is right and that the conflicting party (with her) is in fact wrong. she wants sympathy and understanding and moral support, a kind of alliance with others, in a way that seems somewhat stronger than how i generally seem to feel. while it is true, i think, of most Fe users, my sx sense of what i want makes me more stubborn, impatient, unbudging, whereas she is more flexible and diffuse. i think so types are more often to have their general sense of lightness turn into this kind of DRIFTING away kind of anxiety. i don't feel lost when 100% stressed, i feel that the world has nothing in it of value for me, i lose my ability to want, and in the midst of that, there's no place to escape and let it all pass me by.