This is an interesting article:
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/c...ection-feels-like-physical-pain/#.UmQH-EL3C9Z
What do you think experientially? Do you know of any other research of this nature? Discuss.
I can see the point of the article. As for me, I register both social and physical pain; but I see them as good things. They’re good indicators or markers for making cost/benefit analyses.
For example, given my age (57 years old) I could take the easy route and exercise in a low-stress, pain-free manner by just doing walks around the block and taking the occasional swim or cardio class. But instead I prefer to push a little harder than that. So IRL I do a 6-mile run on even days and do weights & calisthenics on odd days. That higher level of physical activity is quite a bit more physically stressful or even painful and sometimes results in minor injuries, but the benefit is worth it: I like the resulting higher level of physical capability and fitness.
Same with socializing. I could stick to safe social venues (the AARP crowd, the local senior center) where I’ll fit in easily and won’t be challenged or meet with any social rebuffs and where I don’t need to worry about committing social faux pas. But I also like to stretch a little bit and try out social venues where the possibility of rebuffs, humiliations, and rejection are a bit higher: Gun clubs, veteran's organizations, dancing, Mensa, travel, etc. Sometimes I come away with my self-esteem punctured and deflated due to some silly mistake of my own or because of a rebuff or rejection on the part of someone else. But after the initial embarrassment or humiliation passes I re-examine the situation, usually find a new angle on it, and try again next week.
No pain, no gain. It’s about venturing outside one’s comfort zone. I agree that getting outside one’s comfort zone can be genuinely painful and/or humiliating. But I like a challenge. I like to play with the cost/benefit ratio: Increase the discomfort level a little bit, and you might discover a substantial benefit in return.
Also, as you learn to function outside your comfort zone, you tend to get desensitized to the resulting discomfort; you learn not to sweat the small aches and pains or the petty rebuffs and rejections, and instead focus on bouncing back or working through them.